Harvest Goers 2024 Page 1

My ezBoard settings were at 30 posts a page.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

~The Nightly Fungus newspaper HQ, Toad Town MK~

<nowiki>*</nowiki>The year is 2024 (ooh, future-esqe), as implied by the title. Just so you know...

*An investigative reporter Luigi of the Pipes sits in a conference with his editor-in-chief, Eddy T.*

Eddy T.: Luigi...

Luigi: Yeah boss?

Eddy T.: This story just don't cut it.

Luigi: Wha? Why not?!

Eddy T.: Well, look son. What's the headline?

Luigi: "Farmers Finding It Hard to Keep Jobs"?

Eddy T.: You haven't experienced this first-hand.

Luigi: Sure I did! I... you know... I polled some of the farmers out there, and... maybe did an interview or two...

Eddy T.: That's not what I want from you.

Luigi: But...

Eddy T.: You grew up with all these fancy computer gizmos and stuff.

Luigi: Well actually...

Eddy T.: So, I'm going to give you a vacation.

Luigi: But!

Eddy T.: You'll be spending this vacation on an old farm I inherited a couple decades ago. Fix the place up, start some farming on it, you know...

Luigi: First-hand...

Eddy T.: Exactly. I'll expect you to be on the farm in a week, and plan to stay there... oh, maybe a month or so. Take your computer and e-mail your latest articles to me, of course, but I want more depth on THIS one.' This farmers loss isn't something that'll go away in just a month, so you'll have plenty of time.

Luigi: Yes sir...

Eddy T.: Atta boy. Get on home, give the news.

~One week later, the "of the Pipes" residence, Goomba Village MK~

Rebe: Let me just say again that I don't like this.

Luigi: How so? The kids'll be at the Academy for the next few years, those Goomboys are finally off on their own. It would've just been the two of us anyway. It'll only be a month.

Rebe: That's what you said when YOU went back to the Academy.

Luigi: Can I help it that I didn't know as much as I thought I did?

Rebe: Yes.

Luigi: -_-0 *monotone* We'll be fine, dear.

Rebe: You don't think it's odd that a Toad inherits a plot of land on earth?

Luigi: No.

Rebe: *sigh* Fine, let's just go.

~Two hours later, somewhere in Kansas USA~

Luigi: Wife mine, welcome to "Dorado Ranch"!

Rebe: I'll set the fireworks.

Luigi: Spoil sport!

Author: Masamune

~The screen zooms out from Luigi and Rebe and zooms into a farmland, or that is, wasteland nearby, the screen them zooms in until it reaches a sign...~

"Welcome to Mean Acres!"

~The Screen zooms into two short elivish kids~

Masa: Meanacres is the place to be
Farm Killing is the life for me
Land spreading out,
so far and wide
Keep the internet,
just give me that countryside.

Mune: OG Board
is where I'd rather stay
I get annoyed seeing you
I just hate your positive view
Brother, I love you,
but give me The Gamehikers!

Masa: The Pranks!

Mune: The Ranks!

Masa: A Prize!

Mune: More lies... >_<

Masa: You are my bro.

Mune: I Know... >_<

Masa and Mune: Mean Acres we are there!

~Screen fades out and goes in again when the two are in town later~

Mune: I don't get it Mune... why did you quit Nichi!?

Masa: It shut down! The service providing the building and everything went down and so did we...

Mune: *grumbles* Farm indeed, why that's not even worth being used as a DUMP.

Masa: Whiner, once we get some seeds it'll be perfect!

Mune: *kicks pebble* This is why I stopped beign a Party Goer... same old thing, ridiculous plot angle, insane happenings AND nothing ever gets accomplished.

Masa: Tut tut... *goes into the store and returns with some seeds* Ah! Here we go! *munches*

Mune: *glares* So you bought... Salted Sunflower Seeds... Typical.

Masa: Hey! Don't cut me short, I got other seeds. I'm telling you, come Harvest Time, we'll have enough money to invest!

Author: Blaine

Seen zooms in at a nother fram in Mean achers. Wes see three yung men and a sliver colored tiger at a fram with a for sale sign in the tiger's mouth.

Blaine was wereing a hisurai armor as always neatly polished and in perfect condition. The gold armor gleammed in the sun as did his older brother Changs sliver armor. Techno's white lab coat was flapping with the breeze his hair was mussed by it was too. skiver's sliver and black fur was nice and clean and had a nice sheen. sliver spat out the sign.

Bliane: Bah! two v.IP. dynimos the most brillent man alive and a tiger reduced to fram work! there is no honnor in this!

Chang: I agree but an order is an order. We were told to buy this farm and get it started so that is what we are going to do.

Techno: Hmm this does give me a insperation for new fram equipement!

Sliver: Oh no! not this time last time we were on a fram you modified a tracter and I was at the vethospitel for nine mothes and It took two years to regrow my fur!

blaine: let's just clutivate, plant, grow, weed, and get out of here!

Author: Yoshiman

*Yoshiman and Mr. Predict drive by in a 4x4 by LOTP's farm*

Yoshiman: Hey! Look! It's an ORGANIC produce farmer! Let's all laugh at him! Ha ha!

Mr. P: Ha ha!

Fuzzball: Ha ha!

Tirk: Ha ha!

Luigi: And where might you boys be going?

Yoshiman: We were just driving down to one of our enterprise genetically engineered produce farms!

Luigi: Enterprise farms?

Yoshiman: Yeah! Watch out, or we'll buy you out!

Luigi: Uh. . . uh oh?

Author: Blaine

Blaine is culitvating his feild and still very pissed

Blaine: the empire is in neeed of more rice and bamboo so you have to grow rice and bamboo! Bah!

Author: Ditto McCloaker

Narrator: Over at the G & W Ranchero, we see Ditto McCloaker III (grandson of the original owner), stepping out onto the front porch of his humble farmhouse in overealls, cap, and bandana. He stretches the sleep out of his limbs, and then surveys his large, fallow field. Birds overhead sing, and the sun shines happily down on this paragon of simple rural life...

Ditto: Aaaah... A brand new spring, and the weather is terrific! Now, what shall I plant... hm... Ooh. Eggplant would be good. Yes, now I shall... Wha-?

Narrator: Ditto happens to look over the fence around his property and is surprised at all his new neighbors. He decides to go over and say hello to his newest neighbor.

*walks up and peeks over fence, which comes up to just under his eyes, obscuring his face, a la 'Wilson' from Home Improvement.*

Ditto: Well, hidey-ho, good neighbor!

Luigi: *jumps* Oh! Um... hello. Who are you? I mean, er, uh, HOW are you? Eh heh heh...

Ditto: Oooh, I'm doin' fine. And I'm your patient, humble, world-wise advice-dispensing neighbor. Ditto McCloaker. But you can call me 'Wilson.'

Luigi: Uh, okay, Mr. McCloaker.

Ditto: New around here, aren't ya?

Luigi: Uh, yeah. Just moved in.

Ditto: Mm hm, mm hm, mm hm. How's it going?

Luigi: Oh, okay I guess, except I've been here a half an hour and people are already looking for ways to buy me out and/or make me want to run screaming for the city.

Ditto: Ah ha.

Luigi: Yeah.

Ditto: Mm.

Luigi: ...Well?

Ditto: Hm?

Luigi: Aren't you going to dispense some calm words of comfort and wisdom in soothing tones to help me adjust?

Ditto: Uh... don't get killed.

Luigi: ...Rebe...!!!

Author: Blaine

Just across the highway from Ditto and Luigi was Bliane and his friend's farm.

Blaine: Oh stuff it ya ****ing toothpick! Graagh! I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HAATE THIS PLACE!! Bliane retruned to his work. sliver was pulling a plow across the fields with no real effort at all Techno was only following only telling him to slow down or speed up if need be.

Techno; look bliane i know you hate it here but don't take it out on the neibers. hmm sliver just stay at that pace I've got some reserch to do.

Sliver: On what?

Techno: On none poisenus inset repelents and a way to genieticly enhance our crops so the ripen a week faster and produce a greater yeild with out the side ifect of the nagisake insident.

Blaine; Freshly grown rice growing wings and forming a carniverus ant like socisty... I wounder if they ever remided that...

Back at the Causack empire in the port city nagiisake a white clow sweeps over a cow and leaves it a pile of bones upon closer inspection we see that it is really the geniticly enhanced rice... Back with the Harvest goers.

Techno: I have no clue.

Author: Sapphire

~ The scene shifts to an old fashioned farmhouse that outwardly displays all the requirements of classic rural life. It lays somewhere to the northwest of Ditto's and Luigi's respective farms. The occupants aren't new to the land; a seemingly “wealthy” relative is visiting a younger cousin who had decided to renovate the farm that she inherited from her.

Voice Over: Inside the farm, a girl, at least in her early twenties though appears younger is dashing about, clearing the table and humming cheerily to some classical music. She is dressed familiarly in a faded blue summer dress, with glittering red shoes. A sky-blue bandana is tied around her head like a headband. She has been up since four in the morning, but doesn’t seem in the least bit affected by this.

~ Camera: pans outside

Voice Over: As the camera moves to the porch, we see a (presumably adult) woman sitting in a porch swing. Two things obscure her face: A newspaper, which seems to be The Nightly Fungus Newspaper, and a white hat with a large brim.

Woman: Interesting. Luigi of the Pipes dispatched to a rural farm area to discover the truth behind why farmers are doing so poorly economically. Those mushrooms must really have nothing going on in their lives...

~ Camera pans over to the large country-style window.

Girl: (from window) Oh cousin Sapphire~!

Woman: (glances up from paper, slightly annoyed, and we finally see her face)

Girl: I think we might have some new neighbors.

Sapphire: How nice.

Girl: Perhaps we should introduce ourselves.

Sapphire: You go ahead, Lilac. I have about five other papers to finish reading.

Lilac: *in awe* How many are you prescribed to?

Sapphire: More than enough. c_c

Lilac: If you get bored, a Farmer’s Guide to Self-Preservation is around here somewhere..

Sapphire: No, I don’t think I’ll get bored. It’s probably my old copy from when I bought this place anyway.

Lilac: ^^; Be back in a bit. (Starts walking down the road)

Sapphire: (shaking her head)

~ We now return to Home Improvement, already in progress.

Luigi: Really, it isn’t that bad, is it?

Ditto: [laughing] Naw. Was just kidding.

Luigi: *wipes sweat off brow*

Ditto: I hope.

Luigi: O_o;

Ditto: ^^;

Luigi: [rubbing chin thoughtfully] But where do I start? I have to renovate the place.. [Glances around as tumbleweed blows by a broken-down tractor and some roof tiles get blown off and land nearby]

Ditto: Yep. This place has been falling apart. Wondered if anyone would ever come to fix it, but people say the lands been cursed.

Luigi: Cursed?

Ditto: Mm. But those are old tales anyway. Don’t believe them.

Luigi: ..O-kay..

Ditto: I can always loan you my copy of a Farmer’s Guide to Self-Preservation.

Luigi: Really?

Ditto: I can go get it for you now if you like.

Luigi: [nods]

Ditto: Okay. Be back in a jippy. [Goes into house]

Lilac: [arriving down the road] Howdy, neighbor!

Luigi: [turning around] Huh?

Lilac: [waving] I brought you a casserole to welcome you to the neighborhood.

Luigi: Why thanks. It's not by any chance, Eggs, cheese and sausage, is it?

Lilac: That's precicely what it is. ^_^ [tilts head to the side as she looks at him]. You’re not from around here, are you?

Luigi: Nope.

Lilac: You must be from the city. Could you be that investigative reporter that my cousin was reading about this morning?

Luigi: You get Nightly Fungus News here?

Lilac: No. My cousin does. She travels so much that she subscribes to everything, even in Japan.

Luigi: O_o;

Lilac: My farm isn’t too far from here. Just a bit northwest. [points]

Luigi: [nods] I hope that my wife and I can settle into this farm business pretty quickly. Hopefully, if all goes well, we might even enjoy ourselves after the month and have a longer stay-

Rebe: [voice over] NOT ON YOUR LIFE, BUDDY!

Luigi: whoops. c_c; [Sticks out hand] I’m Luigi of the Pipes, by the way.

Lilac: [shakes hand] Well.. it’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr..?

Luigi: …of the Pipes.

Lilac: ^^; I’m Lilac Blue. I've been staying out on my cousin's farm. She bought it on a whim, so I decided to live out here so it wouldn't break down. [glances around at Luigi's farm] Like this one. ^^; They say it's cursed.

Luigi: I heard. u_u;

Lilac: Just a rumor though. Don't worry about it.

Ditto: [returning] Found it!

Lilac: Is that..?

Ditto: Yep.

Lilac: You'll like this book. Very informative. ^_^

Lilac and Ditto high-five one another after Luigi takes the book.

Author: Flutter

~meanwhile past THE FENCE, inside the castle, under the ground~

Secretary: *goes up to the back of a chair* Sir, we have received word of a new residence. *the chair turns around to reveal a Skytroopa in a camouflage outfit*

Sky Troopa: Hmmm... This calls for a nautical strike. *slams hands on desk and leans into the light to reveal Flutter*

Secretary: Gasp. Flutter don't you think that is a little harsh?

Flutter: First of, I don't think at all. Secondly, what is another possibilty?

Secretary: You could go say hello.

Flutter: Intriguing, tell me more.

~later with Luigi~

Luigi: Hmmm... it says to grow crops, I need water. *looks around at the barren wasteland*

Flutter: *drives up in jeep* Excuse me, is this where the new residence lives?

Ditto: Yeah.

Flutter: *gets out and walks up to them*

Luigi: That's me.

Flutter: And what's your name?

Luigi: Luigi of the Pipes.

Flutter: Well Mr. Lou IgiofthePipes, I've got some advice for you.

Luigi: Does it involve watering crops. I just read that crops need water.

Flutter: X_o; Well um... *looks at the barren wasteland* Not really.

Luigi: Good.

Flutter: Don't go past the fence.

Luigi: There are a lot of fences around here.

Flutter: I'm sorry... Don't go past THE FENCE. *points ten fence with barbwire at the top with a sign that says THE FENCE on it*

Luigi: What if I do?

Flutter: I will launch a Nautical Strike on your farm.

Ditto: Gasp.

Lilac: Gasp.

Luigi: Okay... *looks around at the barren wasteland again*

Flutter: Oh, and don't go in the town square.

Luigi: Why not?

Flutter: Cause there is a guy arguing with a scarecrow.

~in town square~

Nintenfreak Jr.: Look I don't care what you say, You are not scary.

ScareCrow:...

NintF Jr.: Fine, we'll settle this with a staring contest.

*a child walks up*

Enthree: *NintF Jr.'s Adopted daughter* Daddy, I hungry and mom wants you to go home, and so do I.

NintF Jr.: Just a second, I think he's giving in.

~back with Luigi, Flutter, Ditto, and Lilac~

Luigi: I see...

Flutter: And don't plant your crops more than 3 feet underground.

Luigi: Why?

Flutter: That's my property, and I will steal the plant.

Luigi: Thanks for the advice.

Flutter: No problem. Just trying to lend a helping hand. *gets back in jeep* See ya, Ditto, Lilac, and Lou. *drives away*

Luigi: Who was that?

Ditto: That's just Flutter. He's not evil, just weird... ~whisper~ and rich. ~whisper~ We try not to talk about him much.

Lilac: Then why are we talking about him now?

Luigi: Good question... Do you have any advice for me.

Ditto: Use water to water your crops.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

Luigi: Mighty nice of you neighbors. Looks like I'll be seeing you, then. *carries stuff back inside*

Rebe: What's this?

Luigi: Country hospitality. Stay away from the guy across the street. He called me a toothpick.

Rebe: Sounds familiar.

Luigi: Yeah... Don't cross THE FENCE either.

Rebe: So what's this about being haunted?

Luigi: Not haunted. Cursed. Eddy T. didn't say anything.

Rebe: Naturally.

Luigi: There's a library nearby. If you want to research it while I'm working. Maybe I can pry some more information from "Mr. Wilson" over there, too. Who reminds me a lot of my old CEO at Nichi, ya know...

Author: Blaine

There was a knock on luigi's door. He opens it and sees Blaine;

blaine: Sorry i yelled i just hate farming with a passion. And being new in town and all. oh by the way here. Gives him some rice seeds. These were genetcly altered by a buddy of mine they ripen faster and produce a bigger yiel then regular rice. just so you know rice farming riquires a lot of help. Oh just two more things. One will you come to dinner at my place next sunday? Two Do you know how to stop a swarm of mutente carniverus rice that formmed an ant like socity? my home land alter some rice and it turned out that way. but don't worry the stuff I gave you won't do that. Ack! Where the hell arm my mannors! My name is blaine Hala Yein.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

Luigi: Blaine, ol' buddy! It's me! I wasn't at the Academy THAT long, was I? I mean, for you to forget me?

Author: Blaine

Blaine: Do... do I know you sir?

Author: Nintenfreak

Secretary: How well did it go, sir?

Flutter: Quite well actually.

Secretary: Would you like to spy on someone?

Flutter: Anything to end this unstructured conversation.

~Town square~

NintF Jr.: Ah ha! you blinked!

Scarecrow: ...

NintF Jr.: Yes you did! I saw you.

Scarecrow: ...

NintF Jr.: That's it. *beats up Scarecrow*

Scarecrow: ...

NintF Jr.: There is a lot more where that came from!*Popeye theme plays, and NintF Jr. crushes a beer can and Liquid courage comes out, and is spilled all over the ground* NO! Why, oh why!?!? *cries*

Enthree: Let's go home, dad.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

Luigi: Sorry, must've been a different Blaine Hala Yein...

Author: Masamune

~Masa and Mune, disguised as bushes, make their way under the cover of broad daylight in the suspicous eyes of a hundred bystanders~

Mune: Somehow I don't like this idea... it seems... IDIOTIC!

Masa: Exactly, no one would expect anyone to be as stupid as to go to such a degree of secrecy in plain sight!

Kid: Oooh! Look!

Parent: Hush, their probably doing some skit about how we need to become better people, ignore them.

Mune: *sweatdrop* Point taken...

Masa: Now... with these seeds... all we have to do is find a mom... or someone to pass as one.

Mune: Why!? That's bloomin' ridiculous!

Masa: *narrows eyes* We'll sneak in... tell old Ma we traded the cow for seeds, she throws them out the window, next thing we know we're in a land of Giant Treasures!

Mune: Are you sure about this?

Masa: I read it... ever heard of Jack? It's a biography about a wealthy man!

Mune: ........

Masa: BESIDES... what could possibly go wrong? We just need to find one!

---

~The two are now seen at Luigi's home, bnoth are peeking in the back window....~

Masa: Must be the new neighbor...

Mune: Or the new neighbor's wife

Masa: Or the new neighbor's musclebound bodyguard equipped with a variety of multi-powered kicks and a powerful Teräs Käsi Deathblow!

Mune: .... you need to get out more, let's just get this over with.

Masa: Fine... through the backdoor.

~The duo sneak in~

Masa: Shame we left Dodo....

Mune: .....

~The walk up directly behind Rebe, without making a sound~

Masa: *slowly pulls out a foghorn and sets it on maximum* WE TRADED THE COW MOM!!!!!!

~A suprised (and nearly deaf) Rebe falls face flat on the floor~

Mune: Great, you killed her.

Masa: Oops....

Author: Flutter

Mune: Now what are we going to do?

Masa: I know. We'll hide the body. Then disguise ourselves as her. Next we'll toss the beans wait over night, the run away to land of Giant Treasures.

Mune: Won't people be suspicious?

Masa: No... of course not.

Rebe: Ow, my ears. *trys to get up*

Masa: *knocks out Rebe* You are suppose to be dead.

Mune: Great plan. Now let's hide the body.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

~Outside~

Luigi: So Wilson...

Ditto: MR. Wilson.

Luigi: Sorry. Anyway, do you know any... you know... rumors about the curse on this farm?

Ditto: Nope. *nervous glance*

Luigi: *waves hand* You will tell me the rumor.

Ditto: There's no rumor.

Luigi: (Blast!) Well then, mind helping me with a little report I'm doing for a newspaper? It's about the economic downfall of farmers.

Ditto: Well... what do you have so far?

Luigi: I questioned a few farmers a couple weeks ago, but they wouldn't comment. So I did some tests on the soil and found it to be somewhat nutrient-lacking.

Ditto: Where'd you take these tests?

Luigi: In the Mu... (no wait, can't mention Mushroom Kingdom by name...) Mushroom Farms of Missouri.

Ditto: They farm mushrooms there? I'll be...

Luigi: So was I right?

Ditto: No.

Luigi: No?

Ditto: Mushrooms don't get nutrients from the soil, Weege. They decompose substances about them and absorb nutrients from THOSE.

Luigi: So... it doesn't matter how bad the soil is?

Ditto: The soil's fine around here. Now lemme tell you what the REAL problem is... *beckons Luigi closer to the fence and whispers* It's the government!

Luigi: NO!

Ditto: *smashes Luigi's face against the fence* Keep your voice down, they'll hear you!

Luigi: Mphmy... (sorry...)

Ditto: Ever since the Mega Mega Extreme Doki Doki Panik party dissolved, the government has gone downhill.

Luigi: Hey, I was a part of that!

Ditto: Really? Now that I think about it...

Luigi: Anyway, you were saying?

Ditto: Right right. We've been growing just as many crops as we've done in the past. The problem is, the government is taking those crops and genetically modifying them, then they tell us that those aren't OUR crops, but their own lab-grown ones. They simply tell us that our crops can't compete with "theirs" and that they were all shipped to Russia. Thus, we don't get payed.

Luigi: Wow. Anyone tried to stop it?

Ditto: I'd tell you, but I've already said to much. AACKK! Duck!

*Luigi and Ditto drop to the ground. Several seconds later, a black car drives past.*

Ditto: *waits for the car to pass* All clear. We'd better get back to our growing before we draw more attention to ourselves.

Luigi: Uhh... got'cha. Actually, I think I'm going to go inside for a bit of casserole. You want any?

Ditto: No no, go ahead. *beckons Luigi close again* And don't tell ANYONE about... (you know what)...

Luigi: Not even my wife?

Ditto: NO ONE!

Luigi: Uhh... all right...

Author: Blaine

Blaine returnned to his farm.

Blaine: Bah! i can't stand this place though i don't mind the neighbers at all. i just hate farming!.

Sliver: i know it's a drag but we got to grow our crops then we hire some dopes and we split.

Chang: To where home is still being attacked by the killer rice!

Techno: I wounder if we can fix that... at the empire an entire town is nothing but scelitens and empty biuldings. A few tanks are in the road anlong with other militaryish weopons.... Back at the farm.

Chang dout it.

Author: Ditto McCloaker

Luigi: Thanks, Mr. Wilson.

Ditto: Just 'Wilson' will do, neighbor.

Luigi: Oh, okay... well, Wilson, what's your first name?

Ditto: Wilson.

Luigi: *thinks* Wilson Wilson?

Ditto: That's right. I was named after my father.

Luigi: You're Wilson Wilson... Jr?

Ditto: Right.

Luigi: *shakes head* I gotta hurry up an' move OUT of this neighborhood...

Ditto: Have a good night, good Neighbor Tim!

Luigi: Huh? Oh, never mind.

~Luigi retires inside. Ditto waits a while, and then also turns in, but he doesn't go to bed. Instead, he goes to a wall painting of a certain famous Arizona Senator of the past, opens it, and reveals a wall safe~

Ditto: Eyes... fingers... toes...

*turns the dial to 2, 10, and 11, and the safe opens, as dramatic music like a film score plays. It's a photograph of the old MMEDDP party during the Vorpal administration*

Ditto: The Neo-Birdocrat Party won't be able to manipulate our nation's precious veggie supply for much longer, however... As soon as we put a stop to their hijacking of our crops... None other than the current President's father... none other than the proprietor of Mean Acres himself, Masamune!

Luigi: Whoa, really?

Ditto: What the heck are you doing here?

Luigi: I got lonely. What's this all about?

Ditto: I'm not at liberty to say.

Luigi: Are you saying-

Ditto: No, 'cause then I'd have to kill you.

Luigi: Good night. *goes home*

Author: Yoshiman

Yoshiman: Fuzzball! Front and Center!

Fuzzball: Yessir!

Yoshiman: Fuzz, I've been hearing some things about that new farmer we were heckling earlier. Say he was a reporter, trying to find the reason that agriculture had gone downhill.

Fuzzball: But we both know it's cause of the government!

Yoshiman: Who do you think pays us?!

Fuzzball:. . . no, wait! Let me guess. . .

Yoshiman: THE GOVERNMENT, YOU IDIOT!

Fuzzball: You mean the men in the black suits?

Yoshiman: No. That would be Masamune's henchmen. They break our thumbs if we don't comply with them.

Fuzzball: Oh.

Yoshiman: Here's your mission: Sabatoge. Take this bucket of. . . Sprites. You know what to do.

Fuzzball: Uh. . .

Yoshiman: *sigh* Covert Operation Foxtrot Charlie Omega.

Fuzzball: OH! Yessir! *Salutes, takes bucket'o Sprites and leaves*

Author: Flutter

~meanwhile at the center of town~

ScareCrow:... [The time is now.] *the black car drives up next to it. The door opens and the scarecrow gets in. The black car drives off*

NintF Jr.: Alright ScareCrow, it's time to finish what I started. *starts staring into nothing* Wait... *stops* where did he go?

~meanwhile behind THE FENCE~

Flutter: It's time to count my warheads.

~later~

Flutter: Gasp... One is missing... Oh wait there it is.

Author: Sapphire

~Lilac returns to her farm after taking care of other chores, whistling slightly.

Lilac: (opening the door) Oh cousin Saph~! (glances around) Er..Saph?

Sapphire: (Sitting in a chair in the darkest part of the room) What?

Lilac: Oh.. there you are. ^^; It’s always interesting when new neighbors come around.

Sapphire: I suppose. *looks bored*

Lilac: What? Like you have interesting things to think about.

Sapphire: Actually, yes. I just find it ironic that you’re at the mercy of the Birdocrats. Pity.

Lilac: (worried look) Not so loud! They’ll hear you!

Sapphire: c_c That wasn’t loud. It was an observation. You all live in fear of the government. You’re probably too young to remember when I was involved in politics.

Lilac: ..I remember you were a senator for a few years.

Sapphire: Heh. There’s more irony for ya.

Lilac: Aren't you supposed to be in hiding?

Sapphire: Why do you think I'm here? Besides helping you of course. It would be better not to mention me.

Lilac: Too late. ^^;

~There is a knock at the door. Lilac freezes, and then rushes to a window and peeks through the curtain.

Sapphire: (rolling her eyes and returning to her reading) Paranoid.

Lilac: (in relief) Oh, it’s only the new neighbor. He looks sorta nervous. (opens the door)

Luigi: Er.. Hello?

Lilac: Good evening. (steps back so Luigi can come in)

Luigi: (looking around, not noticing Saph) Er.. Nice place you have here.

Lilac: Thanks. What brings you by?

Luigi: Erm.. Do you know anything about the.. er, rumors about the curse on my farm?

Lilac: Oh, you’ve only just moved in. Give it some time.

Luigi: Er.. Okay.. and you seem like a cooperative person..I’m writing an article about economic downfall.

Lilac: Well, you’ve seen the area. What happened as soon as you moved in?

Luigi: Er.. within the first half an hour and people were already looking for ways to buy me out and/or make me want to run screaming for the city.

Lilac: Exactly.

Luigi: What does it mean?

Lilac: It’s because of the government.

Luigi: Yes, but-

Lilac: Shhh! You’re not supposed to tell anyone.

Luigi: But how did it get this way?

Lilac: ..I’m not at liberty to say.

Luigi: That’s a popular phrase around here.

Lilac: ^^;

Sapphire: (from her chair in the corner) So it seems your work is cut out for you, Mr. Of the Pipes. My advice: stay as far away from it as possible, unless you have any means to assist them.

Luigi: (glances around nervously) Who said that?

Lilac: Er.. Nobody. ^^;

Author: Masamune

Mura: The Results?

Scarecrow: Aside from the town idot bothering me... everything seems clear... Masa and Mune should soon have enough treasure to fund the purchase of Canada.

Mura: Yes... We already have Mexico... As soon as we have Canada, we can give it some decent names!

Scarecrow: Of course... bwahahahaha!!!

~MEANWHILE...~

~Masa is sitting on Mune's shoulders in Rebe's outfit~

Masa: Now... I throw the seeds! Stupid seeds! Bah!

Mune: Now... to bed.

Masa: Hmm.... think Luigi will notice?

Mune: It's that CURSE remember...

Masa: Oh yeah! *grins*

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

*Luigi walks back home, scribbling on a notepad as he walks.*

Luigi: Good soil... government... genetic crops... Masamune's son... Birdocrats... buying people out... THE FENCE... It's so confusing...

*Luigi enters Dorado Ranch and heads up to the farm house, taking another quick glance over at McCloaker.*

Luigi: Ah well.

*Luigi enters the house and walks to the kitchen. Masa and Mune stand atop each others shoulders in a corner, wearing one of Rebe's dresses and a long brown, curled wig.*

Luigi: I think I'm going to hit the hay, hun.

Masa: *mumbling in attempt to imitate Rebe's voice* Okay dear.

Luigi: You all right?

Masa: I... uh... I have a cold.

Luigi: Okay, take care.

Author: Flutter

~meanwhile at THE FENCE~

Flutter: Hmmmm, I love spying. From up here on top of the hill, behind THE FENCE, I have the perfect view of the town. What's that? *sees the black car driving away* This can't be good.

Secretary: *over two way radio. One in the central command room, and the other in Flutter's watch* Sir, would you want me to launch a Nautical Strike?

Flutter: No. Not right now. But I'll have to leave soon, to go check something out.

Secretary: Yes sir.

Flutter: Pack my bags, and while I'm gone, I want you to keep this place ready to fire.

Secretary: Of course sir.

*the black car drives up to THE FENCE*

Flutter: Oh great. *fires a warning shot*

*the black car drives away*

Flutter: I must hurry.

~later~

Flutter: *tosses bags and weapons into the back of the jeep* Take care. *drives off*

~in the middle of the Town~

NintF Jr.: Where could he have gone?

Enthree: Daddy, Mom wants you to come home.

NintF Jr.: Okay...

Author: Nintenfreak

Mura: Hurry, you fool, before the Jeep catches up with us!

Same: I'm hurring! Get off my a-- butt.

Mura: Ooo! You almost said a dirty word!

Same: That isn't helping! If you think this is easy, why don't you drive?

Mura: Fine.

[as they switch places, the car turns around]

Flutter: Oh ya! Bring it on!

Same: Gyah! Watch out!

Mura: You think this is easy?!

[they turn around again.]

Same: You seemed to.

Author: Yoshiman

*Fuzzball does sneaky secret agent style moves while making his own theme music*

Fuzzball: Dun dun! Duun. . . . dundundun! Dun! dadadadun!

*Opens Luigi's window slowly*

Fuzzball: Dun dun dundundundundundadadadadun! Bum-bum! da da dun!

*Someone walks by, Fuzball freezes against the wall*

Fuzzball: Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. . .

*They look at him, shrug, and move on*

Fuzzball: Du du dun!

*pours Sprites into room*

Fuzzball: He he heh heh. . . I mean, dun! dududun! dududududun! dududududun!

*Sneaks off*

Author: Flutter

Fuzzball: That was too easy.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

*Masa and Mune sleep on Luigi's couch, having discarded the dress.*

Masa: Beans... beans...

Mune: *yawn* Huh? Hey... *kicks Masa's foot*

Masa: Five more minutes, mummy...

Mune: Wake up! We gotta get out of here!

Masa: Wha? We're still in the old guy's house?

Mune: Yeah, and Miss Teras Kasi is still missing. He's bound to notice.

Masa: Whoops.

*The door of the bedroom (down the hall opens)*

Mune: Aackk! No time! We gotta hide!

Masa: Where?!

*Mune lifts the couch cushions.*

Mune: After you.

*The duo crawl under the couch cushions, hoping that Luigi won't notice the fact that they're lop-sided and elevated.*

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

Luigi: Rey? *pause* Hun, where'd you go?

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

Luigi: Sigh, do I ALWAYS have to clean up after you. Leaving clothes everywhere, I swear...

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

Luigi: Ah well, must've gone to the... *pause* Yeah, gone to the store.

Mune: *whispered* Heh heh, good thing I conveniently left that fake note on the table.

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

Luigi: Well, might as well get to work. No point in wasting time. Hopefully Ditto... er... Wilson's up. Wonder if he takes bribes...

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

Luigi: Hang on a minute Weeg, you should at least check the weather first.

Mune: O.O *peeks out from under cushion, to see the TV set right in front of him*

Masa: Heh heh, he talks to himself.

*Mune reaches over and twists Masa's head to see the TV.*

Masa: Whoops.

Mune: Oh please sit on a chair...

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

~SQUISH!~

*Masa resists the urge to howl in pain.*

Luigi: Hmm... this couch feels lumpy. Darn curse...

~CLICK~

*The theme of local soap opera plays.*

Mune: Oh, my favorite! Keep it on!

Masa: :x

~CLICK~

Reporter: And in local news...

~CLICK~

Another reporter: We now turn over to Lorn Pavan with the weather.

Weather reporter: The skies will be a beautiful blue today, with nary a cloud in the sky and temperatures in the mid-eighties.

~CLICK~

Luigi: Hmm... dress lightly.

~UN-SQUISH~

~PLOD PLOD PLOD~

~SLAM!~

Masa: OH MY GOD!

Mune: *crawls out from under the cushion* Well, that was disturbing. It'll take a good year of mental scrubbing to get that out of my mind.

Masa: Help me out, I can't feel my legs. Or my arms, for that matter.

Mune: Or your brain.

Masa: Yeah, that t--... HEY!

Mune: ~evil grin~