Savage Worlds

A tabletop RPG that uses dice and stuff. Has no relevance outside the fact that Luiigii is using Party Goers scenarios during some game sessions. Honestly I just wanted to put these stats here in case I ever lose them. Has no connection to Ben Savage or Boy Meets Worlds sorry GORE.

Plot Summary

First Session

The setting is introduced in a similar fashion to Gamehiker Member OG XI: If These Bears Could Talk. King Cobalt has recently died and Golem has decided to throw one final party before his coronation. Invitations are sent far and wide, and among the recipients are:

• Dom Teedle, a corpulent and clueless Arabian Prince with a flying carpet, wind powers, and a medicine ball
• Bearphoenix Smith, an emo with spiked hair and blinding bangs, a gigantic switch blade, and a penchant for acting like every Final Fantasy main character ever
• James Henry Bond VII, who I can't really describe yet because he wasn't in the second session, but he's got gadgets and stuff like the real Bond
• Henry T. Man, a British gentleman with a gun built into his tea cup and the head of a unicorn, who is completely oblivious to his condition
• Jimmy, Henry's sidekick who is a short and stout teddy bear with a tie, a chainsaw, and a tricycle

They first run into each other at Arab Dude's Party Supplies store while looking for appropriate gifts to present to Golem; only Bearphoenix successfully manages to pick out a Sonic the Hedgehog figurine.

After harassing Arab Dude a bit longer, they set out for the castle and discover Golem and The Lady in Red being assaulted on the lawn by Donkeyman, two shoddily constructed Donkeyman robots, and several Mariorocks. Unaware of who's on which side, Dom Teedle quickly incapacitates the Lady, Bearphoenix attempts to defend Golem, Bond attempts to reason with Donkeyman and heal the Lady, and Henry is horribly offended that no one has spoken to him yet. While the robots and imps are dealt with, Henry assaults Bond at random and then gives his attention to Donkeyman, hoping to make a profit. Donkeyman implies that Henry could be one of his kin and is attacked for it; his own threats prove useless as Henry strikes with a sword and Jimmy finishes him off via decapitation. Of course, this Donkeyman was also a robot, with the shoddy ones only being there to draw away suspicion. Bearphoenix spots Lord Sky watching them and Golem reveals that the Mariorocks were actually disguised Blue Guards, though he is then distracted by the arrival of Luiigii and GORE-ILLA.

While the Lady in Red sneaks off, the group heads inside to the ballroom, which is actually spherical. Bearphoenix takes the stage and summons his band to help him play terrible, terrible music, while Bond and Dom Teedle socialize and Henry wanders off to find things to steal. The latter comes upon a torn-up bedroom where Liger is sleeping and a collection of sapphire earrings are sitting out. He takes the sapphires and sneaks out. Bond spies Vorpal and Masamune arm wrestling (Masa wins) and challenges them to a match for money. Masamune bets five (clay) doubloons and wins, Vorpal bets one torn half of a dollar bill and also wins. Bond gives up and learns from the nobles that none of them are happy with Golem. Dom Teedle's clueless nature pleases GORE, who leads him on a wild goose chase after the missing Golem. He instead finds SteveT and Straw Man looking down into the ballroom from its glass ceiling four stories up. After some banter, Dom Teedle incapacitates Straw Man with one hit and SteveT breaks through the glass and drops into the party. Bond tries to reason with him as well and is smacked hard enough to be conveniently absent from the next session since his player couldn't be there.

Second Session

While Henry and Bearphoenix rush SteveT, the present Party Goers (consisting of Big Al, Flutter, Vorpal, Masamune, Luiigii, and GORE-ILLA) draw straws made from Luiigii's nose hairs to see who gets to stop him this time--Luiigii's luck fails him. Henry sprays SteveT and Straw Man with a burst of tea, which upsets him enough that he hacks into Jimmy and very nearly kills him. Luiigii sends Slort to heal the bear while the assembled group hack at him. Just before SteveT is taken down, Liger wanders into the room and is sent into a berserk rage when Straw Man throws him some catnip. Vorpal gets up and finishes him off while Henry runs away with SteveT's helmet.

The group goes back to socializing and Flutter is offended at Dom Teedle's accusation that no one else in the group is royalty. "Golem" shows up shortly after and is quickly recognized as an imposter. Big Al explains to the players that Golem swapped places with Rhyk and just didn't want Sapphire to know before they can tear him apart. They hear Sapphire shouting shortly after and follow her voice to the destroyed bedroom, where she demands that someone find Golem. Dom Teedle tells her about Rhyk and she demands that Rhyk find Golem instead. When Rhyk finds the unused TASTS in Golem's room, he gets suspicious and leads the group back to the ballroom, though he picks up the Lady in Red on the way and her identity is made apparent to the group.

Back in the ballroom, Golem is being held hostage by Murasame. His crew surrounds him and holds the Party Goers at bay despite the fact that they shouldn't really be that hard to fight off. Masamune is allowed into the circle so they can have a predictable sword duel, while Krunk and Snipes engage the players who have entered from a back door. Krunk is quickly disposed of, though Snipes keeps his distance and proves more difficult. Dom Teedle grabs Golem and tries to carry him to safety, though Golem protests to being useless and rushes back in...though he's completely useless in the long run. Dom Teedle instead jumps down onto Murasame and crushes him, allowing Sapphire the opportunity to ask if Lord Sky hired him.

Third Session

Murasame refuses to give information about Lord Sky, so the players finish him off and follow the Party Goers outside. Once Murasame's crew has been cleaned up, Golem and Sapphire continue the party on the lawn. Dom Teedle wanders the grounds and discovers an old man in a prison cell; he crafts a saddle for himself and takes the man along. Henry remains in the ballroom and picks up the discarded sword. He is possessed by Murasame, then kills Jimmy and runs for the hangar. After the others find Jimmy's body, Masamune explains the swords' curse to them. He refuses to chase Henrysame, thinking the new guys would try to use him to kill Murasame and sacrifice his own life. Vorpal volunteers to escort them instead.

The group takes off in pursuit of Henrysame (having stolen the S.S. Swordefeller) with a flying submarine and two intergalactic buses. Bearphoenix tries to strike up a rivalry with Vorpal (being madly jealous of his awesomeness) and is completely ignored. They reach the ship and Vorpal lands his bus with style a midst cannon fire from Henrysame, some of which strikes the sub. Bearphoenix tries to show him up by crashing his bus into the ship and diving out. The Swordefeller breaks apart and plummets into a cloud bank, approaching the Atlantic Ocean. Bond, piloting the sub, begins to lose control of his own vessel and falls alongside them.

Vorpal and Bearphoenix attempt to wrest the sword away from Henrysame, but the listing ship and more cannon fire hamper their efforts, as well as potshots from Bond that hit his allies more often than his enemy. Realizing the stalemate, Dom Teedle flies over on his carpet and they form a temporary truce with Henrysame until they can all be flown to the sub. They board and Bond regains control. The Swordefeller is left to its fate as the submarine turns back to Turquoise. However, Henrysame remains as defensive as before despite the players' attempts to reason with him; he doesn't think that they'll let him get away and is ready for another fight.

Stats

See: Savage Worlds (stats)