LaAoM Series 3
Soon to be the longest article on Wiki Goers.
| Series in The Life and Adventures of Miyamoto |
| 1 - 2 - 3 - Dr. Wily - Lemony Fresh 1 - Lemony Fresh 2 |
Lemonjello
23 years later...
Miyamoto:Ruling the wolrd is getting really boring.
Met:Controlling your every thought is very entertaining! GWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Miyamoto:You're not supposed to come in till midway through.
Met:Oh yeah. *leaves*
Wozby:What we need is a restart.
Miyamoto:You fool! If we reset the OG...it could happen.
Jozby:What is it?
Miyamoto:The most horrible thing that could happen to us.
Daffy Duck:WOOHOO WOOHOO WOOHOO!!! *presses the reset button*
Miyamoto:NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
OG HAS BEEN RESET
OG Board Pictures presnts...a Nintendo Pictures Production.
The Life and Adventures of Miyamoto
Directed by Mario5000
Co-directed by Matthew Lesko
Randomness provided by Random House
Misc. other by Lupus the Turk
Janatorial work provided by Lemonjello Setzer
Miytamoto:CUT! This isn't how it's supposed to start!
Met:It is now! I have killed every OG writer and now I write this OG! Team Met, come forth!
Wr. Wily:The W rules us all!
Willy:I am the true inventor of video games!
Wats:How are you gentlemen?!
Guy:Your time hath come, Miyamoto-san!
Willy: You shall not defeat me and my loyal soldier, Sir Not Appearing In This OG!
Miyamoto: This calls for drastic measures. Team, it's now time for the over used Team Rocket Motto rip off!
Wozby:But the other members of the team are dead!
Miyamoto:This calls for desperate measures...
Met:And?
Miyamoto:I don't have any more secret weapons to use on you. *sob*
Met:There, there, Miyamoto. You can borrow one of my evil weapons of mass destruction.
Miyamoto:*sniff* Really?
Met:Yep. Now go into my evil airship and pick your weapon.
Miyamoto:Yay!
Wats:How are you gentlemen?!
Wozby:Fine.
Wats:That does not compute. System error. Emgage self destruct.
Met:NOOOOOOOO!!!
Wats:You have no chance to survive make your time.
Mario:Itsa me, Mario!
Luigi:How are you gentlmen?!
Wats:System error! Engage natural disasters! *tornadoes, floods and earthquakes happen for no reason*
Met:We're all gonna die! *everyone dies*
. . . . . . . . . . . . . Narrator:In the OG lab...
Lemonjello:What happen?
Lupus:Somebody set them up the bomb!
Narrator:So, with no characters at all, Lupus and Lemonjello died for no apparent reason.
Mario500:I'm the only one left. That means only one thing...THE LIFE AND ADVENTURES OF MIYAMOTO CAN BE SERIOUS!!!
To becontinued...
NEXT TIME ON THE LIFE AND ADVENTURES
Miyamoto:My poetry reading for today shall be...an Ode to Cheese!!!
Mario500:AAAAAAAA!!! Too much cheese! I'm melting!
Lupus
Miyamoto: Now, time to settle down and start a real entertainment program. My poetry reading for today shall be...an Ode to Cheese!!!
Mario500: AAAAAAAA!!! Too much cheese! I'm melting!
- in the OG's Lab*
Lupus: Hehehehe. Writing this OG rules.
Mario500: Didn't you read Lemonjello's post? You're dead! I'm the only writer!
Lupus: Well, I guess I'll stop. Can I at least write what'll happen next episode?
Mario500: Ok, as long as its serious.
Lupus: Hehe, now's my chance!
NEXT TIME...
Miyamoto: Zaph Creation is my lover. My soul. I love brown sushi!
Wozby: You can feel the city breaking.
Nobuo Uematsu: I like cabbage trees. Smells like pinapple cots.
STAY TUNED!!
Mario500: LUPUS! HOW DARE YOU!
Masamune
Masa: Bwahaha! That LemonJello looked over me... as did everyone! Negligence pays... and soon
Mario500: YOU!
Masa: Crap!
Zaph Creation: GREETINGS.
Masa: Who is that!?
Miyamoto: Zaph Creation is my lover. My soul. I love brown sushi!
Wozby: You can feel the city breaking.
Nobuo Uematsu: I like cabbage trees. Smells like pinapple cots.
Mario500: NO! This isn't serious at all! This is a circus!
Wonzo the Wlown: YIPEE!
Mario500: *pounds reset button*
It was a normal summer day as Miyamato was in his backyard. He often enjoyed the fruitless labor of the litle spacemen and the hundreds of pikmin he saw walk around his garden. His cell phone rang.
"Miyamato-San!" The Cell phone rang, "It is an emergency! The Ghost of Yokoi has returned!"
Miyamato, wasting no time ran to his car and drove towards the Nintendo HQ.
NEXT TIME....
"I want Dialogue!" Lupus yelled angrily, "This is plain annoying!"
"No no! This is perfect" Mario 500 exclaimed in pure delight.
Wozby: Where do I come in now?
STAY TUNED!
Lemonjello
- Miyamoto's car falls into a plothole that leads to the Nintendo HQ*
Miyamoto:What happen?
"I want Dialogue!" Lupus yelled angrily, "This is plain annoying!"
"No no! This is perfect" Mario 500 exclaimed in pure delight.
Wozby: Where do I come in now?
Miyamoto:Why are two people arguing in the lobby?
Guy:I think they're arguing over the format the OG should be in.
Miyamoto:OG? Isn't this real life?
Wozby:Nay, Miyamoto-san! We are the figment of the foul rogues that write this banter!
Miyamoto:Then how come the writers are here? That only means that...
Narrator:Elsewhere...
Kefka:Now Miyamoto will strap a bomb to himself! Oh, how I love writing OGs!
Narrator:Back with Miyamoto...
Miyamoto:I have a bomb!
Wozby:Don't do it, Miyamoto! What about your wife and kids?
Miyamoto:I am not real, only a figment of Kefka's imagination!
Mario500:The OG's sructural integrity has been compromised due to our self-realizationn!
Lupus:Run away!
Wozby:Where's Lemonjello?
Lupus:Ummmm....
Narrator:At the OG writers lab...
Lemonjello:No soliciters!
Narrator:GWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Foolish characters! I am the OG wirter I control evething!
Miyamoto:RPG Battle!
Narrator
HP Lesko/Turner
MP Hedgehog/Echidna
Miyamoto
Absolutely nothing
Narrator uses OG warp! Miyamoto is warped to a nonexistant OG!
Melchior:So..ye hath finally arrived to thy humble evil time warp dimension.
Miyamoto:What?
Melchoir:This is where all forgotten OG characters go to be tortured for all eternity. Make yourself at home.
Miyamoto:I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE!
Wiyamoto:There is no escape for ye, Sir Miyamoto of Banalot.
RPG Battle!
Miyamoto
HP 4432/56789
MP None
Wiyamoto
CHEEEEESE!!!
Wiyamoto uses old english! No effect!
Miyamoto summons a piece of wood! Kills Wiyamoto!
Wiyamoto:Time warp! *Gate opens up* I shall see you in the Egg Kingdom!
Melchoir:NOOOO!!! *jumps into the time portal*
Miyamoto:Boing! *jumps into the time portal*
To be continued...
NEXT TIME ON THE LIFE AND ADVENTURES
Miyamoto:So this is the OG lab?
Met:Yes...now join me, Miyamoto, and we shall be masters of the OG!
Miyamoto:Yes! Destroy all of the OG writers!
Masamune
~BIG SCROLLING TEXT APPEARS...~
THE L&A OF MIYAMATO
EPISODE XXXVIII
THE OG IS UTTER CHAOS AS REBEL WRITERS
FLEE TO ESCAPE THE ONCE CONTROLLABLE
MIYAMATO-SAN. NOW ARMED WITH THE POWERS
OF A MOD, A SOLE SHIP FULL OF WRITERS
FLIES OFF TO ANOTHER PART OF THE GALAXY
WITH THE ONLY CHANCE FOR HELP....
~screens pans to a pink eraser-shaped ship being shot at by a big block of cheese~
~INSIDE SHIP...~
Jay2R3: *beeps*
K-0RL: Yes, yes! I know the OG Board is being destroyed, but what are WE to do!?
J2R3: Beep beep... *turns into a room*
K-0RL: Jay! Where are you going!? Don't leave me! *trots after him*
~K-0RL then finds Prince Shaneia, complete with the bum haircut, giving a message to J2R3~
K-0RL: What was that?
J2R3: Beep...
K-0RL: The princess!? *more beeping* Wait! You know we aren't allowed on the escape pod! Wait, wait for me!
~LATER...~
Miyamato: I'm just not cut out for the life of a OG-Farmer here on Mariooine... If only I knew who the real controllers were...
~MUCH MUCH MUCH LATER...~
~Miyamato runs into the room where Man Wozby was frozen in Carbonite~
Miyamoto: So this is the OG lab?
Met: Yes...now join me, Miyamoto, and we shall be masters of the OG!
Miyamoto: Yes! Destroy all of the OG writers!
~MEANWHILE~
Lupus, LemonJello, Mario500, Masa, J2D3, K-0RL, and others: I've got a bad feeling about this.
~NEXT TIME....~
Masa: Captain! We've entered a Plot Hole!
Mario500: PULL OUT!
Lupus: Aye sir...
LemonJello: We cannot escape, we have over-crossovered and parodied...
Lupus: Blast your Vulcan Logic!
~STAY TUNED!~
Lemonjello
- a huge plot hole appears*
Masa: Captain! We've entered a Plot Hole!
Mario500: PULL OUT!
Lupus: Aye sir...
LemonJello: We cannot escape, we have over-crossovered and parodied...
Lupus: Blast your Vulcan Logic!
Lemonjello:According to the Life and Adventures databanks, this is where all plot holes merge together in an attempt to summon an ancient beast known as...Shanehamut, king of the Admins.
Mario500:THE CONTROLS AREN'T RESPONDING! WE'RE GOING IN!
K-ORL:We're doomed!
J2R3:Beep!
Lupus:Prepare for impact in...5...4 *they ship crashes* Ack! Thes cript said that we would crash after I counted to five!
???:That is because you are at the End of OGs, the place where all of the stuff from this messed up plot go when they die. I know this, for I am...Whane, Miyamoto's ultimate evil robot clone! I have the powers of all the Admins!
Mario500:Miyamoto dosen't have the power to create Whane, only I have that sort of cheesy power!
Whane:Silence, uncheesy ones! Forgotten OG characters, arise!
Wega Wan:You have no chance...
Kefka:...make your time.
Lupus:What you say?
Wiyamoto:You are on the way to destruction! Plot Hole open! *a huge plot hole opens*
Whane:Gwahahahaha! *bright flash of light*
Narrator:Where am I? Who am I? And now back to the OG...
Miyamoto:Wozby, intiate the reanimation sequence.
Wozby:Which one should we awaken first?
Miyamoto:Lupus...because my hororscope told me to.
Wozby:Reanimation complete.
Lupus:All your base are belong to...malfunction. Please consult troubleshooting manual.
Miyamoto:So Whane did have more adverse effects on them than I thought. Wozby, awaken the others while I get Histroy of Whane DVD.
Narrator:34 minutes and twelve seconds later...
Miyamoto:How are you gentlemen?
Lemonjello:I own all of your base! Don't try to take it you soliciter!
Miyamoto:Main screen turn on. *turns on* What you are about to see is the history of my ultimate creation, Artificial Administratives Life Form #0001, codename:Whane.
Narrator:Movie begin.
In the year 2035...Spam was beginning.
tritoch:Mr Miyamoto, I need you to use Shane Sacobie's corpse to make a new robot to deal with the increasing threat of Spam. He needs to be called...Whane Wacobie. I'll give you a custom rank and $646,565,653,535.06 to complete him. And I need him in the next six months.
Miyamoto:Agreed.
5 months later, during the testing period...
Whane:You_are_inferior. You pathtic humans require...*power outage occurs, DVD player stops*
Gaspar:This plotline has gone on too long! Plot line change!
Miyamoto has begun his day with Folger's cofee, the olny thing you should drink in the morning, lest you incur the wrath of th Folgers Mafia. But anyways...
Miyamoto:Wozby...I had a vision that told I must create an entity known as Celda, which lead to my own extremely painful downfall.
Wozby:*yawn*
To be continued...
NEXT TIME ON THE LIFE AND ADVENTURES
Miyamoto:Question #1, why you exist?
Celda:I exist only to destroy the Legend of Zelda franchise.
Miyamoto:Correct!
Lupus
Miyamoto: WOZBY! GIVE ME MY CUP OF TEA!
Wozby: Yes sir.
Miyamoto: How is the Celda operation going along?
Wozby: We're currently in Stage Bli-NK 1.82. Should be finished... probably at Stage SuMM 41.
Miyamoto: Which is...?
Wozby: Two seconds from now.
- Two seconds later, Bob Dole steps out of the Celshademachine*
Celda: Hiya! I'm a game that is represented by Bob Dole.
Miyamoto: I am about to ask you a series of questions which will ultimately lead to you getting fired. Ready?
Celda: Fire.
Miyamoto: Question #1, why you exist?
Celda: I exist only to destroy the Legend of Zelda franchise.
Miyamoto: Correct! Now, Question #2, who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?
Celda: That was you.
Miyamoto: *sweatdrop* Uh, yeah. Anyway, it's time to... PLAY DUCK HUNT!
- Suddenly Nintendo HQ fades away, revealing a huge swirling abyss*
Gaspar: I am going to go insane if don't encounter another human being soon.
???: I am another human being, Gaspar.
Gaspar: Who are you?
???: I am simply known as ???.
Gaspar: Why are you here and what do you want?
???: I am here to offer you an oppurtunity:fufill your destiny and join Lemony Fresh Cleaning Co. and become my right hand man!
Gaspar: I guess so. It's better than doing nothing in here.
???: Then come with me to 2001 AD! *jumps in a time portal*
Gaspar: Okay.*jumps in a time portal*
Narrator: In the year 2001 *A huge lemon explodes* war was beginning. But that does not concern us, as this is the tale of Lemony Fresh...
Gaspar: Impressive facilities. But I have one last question that will determine whether or not I work here...is there a small, weak monkey boy that I can boss around?
???: Yes! You're hired! As an employee of this company, I can now tell you my real name...LUIGI!!!
Gaspar: Luigi? Aren't you busy saving the Mushroom Kingdom and stopping Toad's assasination attempts?
Luigi: I am doing this for...revenge.
Gaspar: Why?
Luigi: Lemony Fresh cleaning products are really a way of gathering income so I can build my Lemony Ray to utterly destroy the Mushroom Kingdom. Then Sarsaland, which I rule after forcing Daisy to abdictate, will rule all of the Mushroom World!
Gaspar: So you're asking me to dragged down your path of senseless of destruction of your vendetta against a few individuals?
Luigi: Well...ummmm...yes.
Gaspar: I'm in!
Narrator: And so Gaspar and Luigi worked hard for weeks until a mysterious stranger arrived early Monday morning...
Miyamoto: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?
Gaspar: Miyamoto-san, I have been sent here through billions of miles of space to your petty little mind, to give you one thing. One thing that may change the future of the Earth as I, not you, know it. It holds the power to everything.
Miyamoto: ...what is it?
Gaspar: The Life and Adventures of Miyamoto Series 3 Special Edition DVD.
Miyamoto: I have no DVD player.
Luigi: You shalt find thou DVD player in the place where the moon and the sun cross, where to two rivers of god are met.
Miyamoto: So Chadstone shopping center, right?
Luigi: Correct, Miyamoto-san. Now, be off!
NEXT TIME
Miyamoto: Oh no! They've been revived!
Shanehumut: Bwahahah!
Tritoch: Grrr!!
Wepviathan: Heheheheh!!
Shanehumut, Tritoch and Wepviathan: AMAZING TRANSFOR ATTACK!!
TO BE CONTINUED...
Lemonjello
Menawhile, in the Shrine of the Three, directly under Chadstone shopping center...
Guy:Oh great Shanehamut, Tritoch, and Wepviathan, I offer you this great sacrifice to revive your long dormant powers of ancient days...Livazio donatio adminlazo spamarkonranki avatatret...Admins of the of next relam beyond our planet, awaken!
Shanhamut:Why hath ye awakened us from our eternal slumber?
Guy:I was...ummmm, Shigeru Miyamoto spammed the Dreamboxcubestationcast 2 Forum! You muust ban him!
Wepviathan:I like banning people for no reason.
Tritoch:This board will be dead in a week.
Menawhile, with Miyamoto...
Quina:DVD player good eat. I no eat Miyamoto DVD playerfor it have *Quina teleports to Mars*
Miyamoto:Ummm...I'll just take it home now. *walks out of store to see Shanehamut,Tritoch, and Wepviathan*
Miyamoto: Oh no! They've been revived!
Shanehumut: Bwahahah!
Tritoch: Grrr!!
Wepviathan: Heheheheh!!
Shanehumut, Tritoch and Wepviathan: AMAZING TRANSFOR ATTACK!! *they transgorm into Adminxander*
Adminxander:BAN THEM ALL*shoots a laser beam at Miyamoto, who dies*
Wozby:I summon the Eidolon, Al! *Al kicks Adminxander, then dies*
Adminxander:I MUST COMPLETE THE MISSION OF THE GREAT GOOFBIRD!!!!!!!111
Wozby:Worst. episode. ever.
Menawhile, with the ghost of Miyamoto...
Quasimodo:Welcome to the home of the deceased great ones of video games, VGF.
Miyamoto:VGF?
Qausimodo:Vincent's Game Freaks.
Miyamoto:Why did this Vincent send me here?
Qausimodo:To extract your power.
Miyamoto:Why?
Quasimodo:So he can summon Alberto san Valencia, the immortal tennis ball.
Miyamoto:Never! RPG Battle!
Quasimodo casts flare!
Miyamoto dies.
Game over.
- the camera zooms out to show 6 kids playing The Life and Adventures video game in the Nintendo Game Testing Facility*
Kid1:This is crap!
Miyamoto:Noooo! Now I will never show the world my master creation...
Man:Based on the opinion of one person?
Miyamoto:*sob*...yes...
Wozby:Nintendo is doomed now. Seeing as our coin op home console failed, The Japanese Video Game Mafia will kill all of us in our sleep.
Miyamoto:Then we have only one option...
Wozby:Contact the authorites and seek justice?
Miyamoto:Drink 5345 cups of cofee so we will never havee to sleep again?
Shanehamut:I think not.
Man:How did you get here?
Shanehamut:The elevator.
Man:Oh, yeah.
Shanhamut:Tritoch, show them the future of VGF!
Tritoch:<gwok gwok> *uses his magic to show them the vision of the future*
In the vision of the future...
Shane:In addition to the 3467% increase in the weekly donation, the last free nation caved in and surrendered.
Cid:Sir, the people's spririts have completly broken. You have complete control, except...
Shane:Except?
Cid:A small resistance group only known as the WVALANCHE. I have a list of the members...Shigeru Miyamoto, Will Wozby, Will Jozby, Homer Simpson, Lemonjello Setzer, Lupus the Turk, and Man.
Shane:Did you say...Man?
Cid:Yes sir.
Shane:My old rival from the early days of VGF...
Cid:Your old rival?
Shane:We were competing to rule the world through creating video game froums...I won, but Man swore revenge.
Cid:Should I send out the Admins?
Shane:Yes...kill all of them except Man. Bring him to me.
To be continued...
NEXT TIME ON THE LIFE AND ADVENTURES
Miyamoto:Man, who are the real Admins contolling Tritoch, Shanehamut, and Wepviathan?
Man:Mario, Melchior, and Quina.
Masamune
Miyamato: I must find someone to helpp us.
Wozby: Good idea.
Miyamato: But how?
Jozby: Call Cleo!
01:35, 8 April 2007 (MDT)~
- RING*
Cleo: Hello there! I can see you have called for help!
Miyamato: *puts hand over phone* She is GOOD!
Jozby: Ask her!
Miyamato: I need you to-
Cleo: The cars here are telling me your girlfriend is cheating on you.
Miyamato: *gasp* I should have known!
Cleo: But I see trouble brewing over here...
Miyamato: Yes! Yes! We are wanted for our Coin-Op console!
Wozby: *grabs phone* Listen chubby. We need help agaisn the admins. Who do we call.
Cleo: Man... *under breath* These guys are jerks...!
Miyamato: Man! She knew it! I knew she would know it!
Wozby and Jozby: ..........
01:35, 8 April 2007 (MDT)01:35, 8 April 2007 (MDT)01:35, 8 April 2007 (MDT)01:35, 8 April 2007 (MDT)
~After a long, 20+ hour adventure including several sidequests and bosses (Which are all featured in Paper Miyamato) go by as they finally meet Man~
Man: Why have you come?
Miyamato: To stop the admins!
Man: They are merely shells of the TRUE admins...
Miyamoto: Man, who are the real Admins contolling Tritoch, Shanehamut, and Wepviathan?
Man: Mario, Melchior, and Quina.
Miyamato: NO! That can't be true!
Wozby: Why not?
Miyamato: *narrows eyebrows* All of them have to do with Square....
Man: So you found out, eh? *turns into a giant Square* I have lived long for... THE WORLD TO BE SQUARE!
Miyamato: Never! The world is meant to be flat!
Jozby: Psst... Round
Miyamato: RIGHT!
NEXT TIME ON L&A
Miyamato: Mario... you were never Italian?
Mario: It'sa true...
Miyamato: WHY!?
Mario: I will-a make it square... and every other country after!
STAY TUNED!
Lemonjello
- man takes off his mask to reveal....*
Mario:Itsa me, Mario!
Wozby:Stop the Italian accent. You were never italian.
Miyamato: Mario... you were never Italian?
Mario: It'sa true...
Miyamato: WHY!?
Mario: I will-a make it square... and every other country after!
- Mario Segali appears for little or no reason*
Segali:Itsa me! Mario!
Mario:No! Ima Mario!
Miyamoto:???
Wozby:Mario got his name from Mario Segali, the guy who owned one Ninty's warehouses. That is all.
Segali:Wa! Ha! Woohoo! *kicks Mario*
Mario:Wahahahaha!
Segali:How are you gentlemen?
Miyamoto:Fine...I guess.
Segali:All your Miyamoto are belong to us. You have no chance to survive make your time.
Miyamoto:Sporkio, I summon you!
Sporkio:Itsa me! Sporkio!
Miyamoto:Kill Segali and Mario!
Sprokio:Itsa me! *kills them*
Phone:Ring.
Miyamoto:*picks up phone* Hello?
Man:*on phone* Hello? Is this W Busters HQ? There is a Wario Wegali stealing my sporks.
Miyamoto:Wrong number. *hangs up*
Cid:IT CAN'T END LIKE THIS!!! AAAAAAARGGGGGHHHH!!!
SUPER CID PLOT CHANGE O RAMA!!!!!111
- the world is unbalaced by Cid's attack*
Narrator:On that day the world changed forever.
Cid:Miyamoto? You finally woke up after all these years!
Miyamoto:What you say?
Cid:Catch me lot o fish. No bad fish either.
Miyamoto:I am very confused.
Ad man:Then take a trip to Sim City! Gwahahahaha!
To be continued...
NEXT TIME ON THE LIFE AND ADVENTURES
Lemonjello:Gentlemen...I'm afraid that Life and Adventures is now an illegal substance in Guam, Japan, and Russia.
Lupus:We must take action now! Call the men in steepled hats!