Gamehiker High University Page 1

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Author: GORE-ILLA

*Golem is woken up by his Space Harrier alarm clock. He quickly takes out his retainer, and proceeds to get ready for school. Golem then rushes out and runs to the bus stop. He sees Professor Vorpal waiting there in his half-school bus, half-ice cream truck.*

Golem: Ah, right on time!

*Golem steps towards the bus when suddenly the door slams shut in his face and the bus drives off. Soon it is completely out of Golem's sight, but he can still hear the ice cream bus's generic melody echoing down the boulevard.*

==THE GUYS DID ONE OR TWO GOOD OGS BRING YOU...

==HIGH SCHOOL AND/OR UNIVERSITY GOERS- DEPENDING ON WHICH IS MORE CONVENIANT AT THE GIVEN MOMENT!==

*Golem quickly enters the school.*

Golem: Oh I'm late I'm late I'm late...

Toby: (leaning against a locker, wearing a leather jackets and shades) Yo Golemio.

Golem: Toby? Oh good, I thought I was late for homeroom.

Toby: You are.

Golem: What... then what are you doing just hanging around here?

Toby: Hey! I'll go when I feel like it... (looking past Golem) I suddenly feel like it now. (runs off)

Golem: What's he so worried about? (turns around and bumps into... Headmaster Mune!!!) Oh, I'm sorry sir!

Headmaster Mune: Well well, if it isn't Golem, the little ringleader. A little late for homeroom, aren't we?

Golem: Sorry sir, I missed the ice cream bus and had to run across the desert and swim the moat to get here! Those alligators get faster every day...

Headmaster Mune: Hmph! Not so careful without the rest of your precious "Party Goers" to back you up, eh?

Golem: But- sir, I- Sorry sir-

???: Hey, quit pushing the poor kid around!

Headmaster Mune: What... who dares? (looks and sees Sapphire there) Oh you.

Sapphire: Yeah. The kid's telling the truth. In fact I paid Vorpal to ditch him there. I have it on tape if you want to see it.

Headmaster Mune: (glares) You are so lucky that the state requires each school have at least three female students (screen quickly flashes to establish the other two girls- Elzie and Kuria). Well you're off the hook for now... (leans in close to Golem's face) Party Goer.

Sapphire: Seeya in Phys Ed, Golem! (walks off)

Golem: (stares after Sapphire blankly for a while)

Headmaster Mune: Get to class already, your mortal affections disgust me!

Golem: Yeah, eh, uh, sorry sir. (runs off to Professor GORE's homeroom)

Headmaster Mune: Heh heh... I showed him. (trips and falls over, then notices that his shoelaces had been tied together; his face glows red) Grrrrr.... PARTY GOEEEEEEEEERS!!!

Author: Masamune

~Headmaster Mune continues his patrol of the halls... straight into the BATHROOM~

Lupus: ~is wearing a Australian cowboy hat and like, a crocodile skin vest or something~ Man, those Party Goers. They're all "Turn in your post" and that's like, so VGF Tech College, you dig man?

Yami: ~is wearing a generic cowboy hat~ My God, you're right. Why didn't I see it? I should totally drop out.

Mune: AHA! *steps out in front of them*

Lupus: Hey buuuuuddy.

Yami: Oh snap!

Mune: Thinking of dropping out, Mr. Yami?

Lupus: I thought it was Mr. Yoshi.

Yami: Naw dude, I switched around my names for some stupid reason I forgot.

Mune: Hey I got an idea. GET BACK TO CLASS. *points to Lupus* And register for classes!

Lupus: Naw man, I'm cool.

Mune: You'll pay for this, mark me! *turns around and hits the bathroom door on the way out* PARTY GOEEEEEEEEERS!!! CURSE YOU!

~Meanwhile~

Professor GORE: Now as you can see, there is many fields of study on whether Donkey Kong as you see him here is actually the original Donkey Kong or DK Jr. grown up. Advocates from the the DKU Foundation propose "Screw Nintendo" and have set me on fire several times. Any question?

Golem: Will this be on the test?

Professor GORE: Everything is on the test, ever. Whether I talk about it or not. Even if it's not in the book.

Sapphire: Aw that sucks.

Professor GORE: Now moving on... BREAK TIME. Get out of my face stupid kids.

Author: Golem

~Gamechamp, leaving GORE's class, enters the bathroom.~

Yami: ~whispering to Lupus~ Hey, there's the new foreign exchange student.

Lupus: ~whispering~ Who did they exchange him for?

Yami: ~whispering~ Luigi the Doubter.

~Elsewhere, in who knows where...

Luigi the Doubter wanders through a field full of cows. Finally he reaches a person.~

Doubter: Excuse-a me! Can-a you-a tell me if I'm-a anywhere near-a the school-a?

Person: Croikey, mate, this-a IS the school-a, yah? ~rips open a pack of bite-size sushi~

~Back in the bathroom...~

Yami: Hey kid. I've got cheat sheets for Prostupid GORE-ILLA's test tomorrow. Want 'em?

Gamechamp: Cheatie sheeties? I am-a noht sure I should be using thees...

Lupus: We only want to be your friends. Teachers love students with cheat sheets, heck those students get extra credit!

Gamechamp: Rove zem, eeh? Croikey, thanks matey! ...Want some bite-size sushi?

Author: Masamune

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