The OGers: The Third Generation Page 3

Pages in the The OGers: The Third Generation Archive

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AaronGuy

~Just outside of the Mayors building in Rocketsville I, in a pile of MechaSonic parts~

Ramsey: ~beaten and bloody~ ~crawls his way out of the junk pile~ This... doesn't.. make any sense... ~wheezes~ Urgh.. so cold... ~closes his eyes, feeling the warmth leaving from his body... then slowly return~ ....Wha?

Spiritual Voice: Wow, is it ever a good thing I found you when I did! You were on the ropes!

Ramsey: Who's there?

Voice: Call me Moondo. I placed my soul in your body. It'll help you get back on your feet. Just rest for a bit, though, if you'd please...

Ramsey: Hold on. I don't want to share my body with anyone. I appreciate the gesture, but I think I'll be fine.

Moondo: On the contrary, my friend, you really DO need me. Not just for the lifeforce either.

Ramsey: What are you talking about?

Moondo: ...You want to know about the explosion, right? Well, your sensors are just a bit off. It didn't happen in the year 2000. It was the year 2018. Good guess, though.

Ramsey: You mean it DID happen? Then what was that turtle trying to hide?

Moondo: That's the odd thing. He isn't aware it happened. No one is. Except for a handful of people...

Ramsey: ~sits up~ Why is that?

Moondo: Hey, this is what I'm here for. Okay, here's what you're going to need to do to get all the answers. You're going to need to find one of the living OGers from the 2nd generation. Not many are alive, but one, GORE is still kicking. He's in Rocketsville II, which is west of here.

Ramsey: This is a lot to absorb... ~stands up~

Moondo: I know, I know. But hey, you wanted the answers. Oh, by the way, you MIGHT want to pick up some clothes on the way there. Torn jumpsuits are NOT all the rage.

Ramsey: All right, all right. But first... ~digs into the MechaSonic parts, taking out an arm and a leg~ Let's see if they too my... Aha! ~Reaches through a hole in his jumpsuit, pulling out a a small set of tools~

Moondo: ...You keep things like that in your underwear?

Ramsey: It's underwear with pockets, don't worry. What can I say? I like tools, and I like machines. Maybe if I rework these things, they can replace my old bracers...

Moondo: ...My friend, this is the start of a lovely relation ship. You better work on the go, though.. it's a long walk to Rocketsville...

SteveT

~Inside Scott Smith's School of Medieval Blacksmithery~

Scott: That'll do it, you're all fixed up.

SteveT: Thank you. Hopefully I can avoid being slammed into a wall for a few more posts.

Scott: Yeah, I hope so...

SteveT: You look sad. Minions aren't allowed to look sad. Stop that!

Scott: Well, it's just that...Now that I'm safe from being needlessly murdured by you, I kinda wish I coudl go home.

SteveT: MINIONS AREN'T ALLOWED TO LOOK SAD! ...I have to make a phone call.

Narrator: SteveT opens a previously inconspicuous door in his left breast. He pulls out the N-gage and holds it up to his ear, sideways. It rings for a moment, and someone picks up.

SteveT: Yo

Straw-Man: I can't believe you just said that. It's Straw-Man, not Lynel, you idiot.

SteveT: I never said it was Lynel...

Straw-Man: There you go again! Tuesday is taco night. You're wrong about everything.

SteveT: Put Lynel on...

Straw-Man: I will, but in stopping this conversation, you concede to my every point, as we agreed.

SteveT (shouts): I never said that!

Lynel: Hey.

SteveT: I thought I told you never to give him the phone again.

Lynel: YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME?

SteveT: *sigh* What are you guys doing this week?

Lynel: We were gonna go to the mall and pick fights.

SteveT: Would you rather be killing people who vaguely remind me of Festivity Attenders?

Lynel: Always. I'll fire up the Lead Zeppelin. Where are you?

SteveT: Rocketsville II. Get here quick before my ride leaves. He's leading me to our victims until I find he reminds me too much of one of them.

GORE-ILLA

*Back in the hidden warehouse in Persian Alley, EVIL Scientist gets up from a spinnig chair.*

EVIL Scientist Dude: ...Well I guess we'll be leaving now! Watch over the place in the meantime, Mousie!

Mousie: Alright, mon!

*So EVIL Scientist Dude and Aither leave and walk out into the streets.*

EVIL Scientist Dude: Hey kid, you have that like of good intentions on you. That attracts Rockets.

Aither: Don't worry, I can just intesify the sun's rays around me to put glares in people's eyes when they look towards me.

*Back at Scott's place, SteveT has just finished his last line when GORE wheels into the room on a wheelchair.*

GORE: Hey, were you guys just talking about me? My ears are burning!

SteveT: Umm... no, no, not at all. ...So how long will your friend take? We can't waste time finding those Festivity Attender-reminders!

GORE: Oh, he should be back about... (pauses) now!

*EVIL Scientist Dude and Aither walk in.*

EVIL Scientist Dude: Hey, I found our first recruit! Now it will only be a matter of time until the rest of the Third Generation is assembled.

SteveT: Yes... only a matter of time... until I have my REVENGE! ...Whoops, wasn't supposed to say that last part out loud.

Luiigii of the Pipes

Rocket Admin: So... Miss Harripittis...

Ashley: It's Hanimar.

Rocket Admin: Ah, Hanimar...

Ashley: I mean of the Pipes.

Rocket Admin: Okay, of the Pipes...

Ashley: Well, maybe Harripittis...

Rocket Admin: *slams fist down* Listen. Daughter of that one hobo Jedi guy. You know that Party Goers and relatives of Party Goers have been restricted from walking the streets of... *throws curtain open* ROCKETSVILLE!!!

Slort: Um, actually...

Rocket Admin: What?

Slort: *sips coffee* Well, you see. Luigi wasn't actually a Party Goer.

Rocket Admin: We have records that claim otherwise.

Slort: That's nice. But really, how could he have been a Party Goer? He used to own a pizza place here way after you put that law into effect. Unless your system is... mm... lacking?

Rocket Admin: We have no records that claim the existence of such a pizza place. You know how MagiKoopa likes his pizza, Goomboy. He would have known if there was one.

Slort: Whatever. Please go on.

Rocket Admin: Yes, so... You do understand, Daughter of that one hobo Jedi guy, that walking these streets with a concealed beam sword is also against the law. Hence we have confiscated the device.

Ashley: I wouldn't mind having it back some time soon.

Rocket Admin: Ha ha, yeah. We kinda broke it apart.

Ashley:

Rocket Admin: We just want to know why you're here...

Slort: Coffee.

Rocket Admin: Shut up.

Ashley: What he said.

Rocket Admin: I've been counting how many times you've refused to answer, you know. The law says that every time you give a false answer in an interview like this, you have to watch one of MagiKoopa's homemade animes. Just so you know.

Ashley: Really? How many times?

Rocket Admin: 3456.

Slort: You'd think you'd learn to stop asking.

Rocket Admin: Shut up. Now--

Intercomm: Hey... admin?

Rocket Admin: What?

Intercomm: The Rocket Agent wants all of the captives brought to his office. He's going to interview them all at once.

Rocket Admin: Hmph! Fine! *turns off intercomm* Well, it's only a matter of time before one of you cracks. My bet's on the Cataquack, but we'll see...

Ashley:

Slort: *sips coffee*

AaronGuy

~Just outside Rocketsville II~

Moondo: Any luck with that thing?

Ramsey: ~Fiddling with the MechaSonic Leg~ I think so. I rewired it, so maybe if I twist this thing over here...

Leg: ~activates a booster~

Ramsey: ACK! ~Flies backwards~

Leg: ~disengages~

Ramsey: ...Well, at least we don't need to walk anymore.

Moondo: Funny. Well, there's Rocketsville. Let's just find you a clothing store.

Ramsey: And how am I supposed to pay for it without the proper currency?

Moondo: Well... I... Hadn't thought of that. Have anything worth bartering?

Ramsey: Well, other than these Robot parts, no. Let's just head into town, and hope we find someone interested in buying scrap metal.

Moondo: Yes, lets.

Luiigii of the Pipes

Rocket Agent: Well well... now that you're all gathered and your hands have been bound, I can begin.

Cataquackers: I'll tell everything! I can't take the pressure! END THE PRESSURE!

Rocket Agent: . . . I haven't even started the pressure, but okay...

Masamune: No! Mr. Cataquackers, pull yourself together!

Cataquackers: How? I don't have any hands! *turns to Rocket Agent* OH GOD! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY HANDS?! I'll tell! I'll tell! Just don't take my eyes... I DON'T HAVE ANY EYES! WHY?!

Rocket Agent: Um...

Masamune: Arr, ye'll be gettin' no information from us, lubber!

Slort: What he said.

Rocket Agent: *pounds his desk* Oh, don't be so sure. I have ways of breaking you. Just look what I did to your Cataquack friend!

Masamune: No, that's normal for him.

Goonetta: I can vouch for that...

Lt. Snagret: Yarr.

Bumptles: Indeed.

Albatosso: Yup.

Klepton: It's tr--

Rocket Agent: All right! I get it! *eyes Cent-Sorio* What about you, then?

El Cent-Sorio: I answer only to my employer. Speak with him, if you wish.

Rocket Agent: *eyes Chibi-Devil* Spill, lizard!

Chibi-Devil: You can say that again.

Rocket Agent: Spill, lizard!

Chibi-Devil: You can say that again.

Rocket Agent: Spill, lizard!

Chibi-Devil: You can say that again.

Rocket Agent: Spill, lizard!

Chibi-Devil: You can say that again.

Rocket Agent: Spill, lizard!

Chibi-Devil: You can say that again.

Rocket Agent: Spill, lizard!

Chibi-Devil: Now's your chance. Knock him out.

Rocket Agent: Spill, lizard!

Cataquackers: I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Narrator: Cataquackers leapt onto the Rocket Agent's desk, scooped him up in his beak, and then flipped him through the ceiling.

Rocket Agent: Argh! I knew we should have cut that thing off!

Narrator: The Rocket Agent leaps back into his office, but it's now empty.

Rocket Agent: Why those little--

El Cent-Sorio: Ah ah ah!

Narrator: Cent-Sorio slaps a giant sticker with a red X over the Rocket Agent's mouth, then runs out of the office again. The Rocket Agent hits the button on his intercomm.

Intercomm: Sir?

Rocket Agent: Mm mmph!

Intercomm: Sir, is that you? I can't understand a word you just said.

Rocket Agent:

Narrator: Meanwhile, the others are making their escape, despite their bonds.

Masamune: This way! I can sense the S.S. Dodo!

Lt. Snagret: How can you sense it, captain? It's a ship.

Masamune: How dare ye?! Of course I know where me own ship is!

Narrator: Masamune throws himself against a door and flies through it. The room is empty, except for a note on the floor that says, "Dear Masamune, we moved the S.S. Dodo to our base in Nevada. Have fun trying to reach it now. Ha ha ha. -MagiKoopa"

Masamune: Dang and blast! We'll have to jump!

Narrator: Masamune runs for the open hangar door.

Lt. Snagret: But captain! No one's following us. We could just go back the way we came and use the elevator.

Narrator: Too late, as Masamune jumps out the hangar door. His crew, being birds, shrug and follow him, leaving Cent-Sorio, Chibi-Devil, Ashley, and Slort in the hangar alone.

Chibi-Devil: Well well... long time no see.

Slort: Not really. We were in the same room for the last fifteen minutes. We had to have seen each other then at least.

Chibi-Devil: I know what you're planning, Luigi's friend and Luigi's daughter! You want to ssstop me! But I won't let you!

Ashley: We don't even know what you're doing TO stop you.

Chibi-Devil: You can say that again.

Slort: Forget that. We're out of here.

Narrator: Slort walks for the door. Ashley looks at Chibi-Devil and Cent-Sorio, shrugs, and follows.

Ashley: Can we find my laser sword first?

Masamune

~Meanwhile, on board the newly christened S.S. Dodo 2 minivan, Masamune drives on...~

Masamune: Curse that MagiKoopa, I never did like him!

Lt. Snagret: You should've have jumped off, sir. You're luck the only bones you broke were that Rocket Grunt's.

Masamune: Aye, but it be fortuitous that I did. Else we would not have gained a new ship!

Lt. Snagret: VAN.

Masamune: It be a ship and any bird who says otherwise can walk this 'ere plank!

Lt. Snagret: It's a VAN. It doesn't have a plank! And vans don't need christened!

Goonetta: You know, it is kind of crowded in here. Why did we have to bring the girl and goomba?

Masamune: Insurance!

Goonetta: Of WHAT?

Masamune: We're in one of them thar alternate timelines. See, the Luigi I knew was a hobo. Filthy, dirty, and married to a mop. But this 'ere daught of his makes him out like some fancy pants Jedi.

Lt. Snagret: Fascinating.

Masamune: And the goomba spoke gibberish.

Slort: Mmf! *struggles with gag* Mrrrrf!

Bumptles: So where to, cap'n?

Masamune: Nevada. I want me ship back!

Lt. Snagret: Okay. Well then, I suppose you shouldn't have taken that bypass to Canada two exits ago.

Masamune: Arr? No! I be doing this as a distraction in case they be following me! Get out the map!

Lt. Snagret: Cap'n, we birds. We ain't got hands.

Masamune: Grrr. Get in the back then and bring the girl up here.

Ashely: *gag is removed as is the bounds around her hands* If it wasn't for you driving at reckless speeds of 200 mph in the wrong lane, I'd strangle you.

Masamune: Ye dare insult me honor at driving?

Goonetta: Well, you never did get a driver's licence...

Masamune: HUSH! Look at the map, girl!

Ashley: You could ask directions.

Masamune: ARR! MAP. READ. NOW.

Ashley: Fine, but only until you stop. Then I'll kill you.

Masamune: All the women say that.

Ashley: -_-

Luiigii of the Pipes

Ashley: All right, you need to go west on 46.

Masamune: West?! Which way be this west?

Ashley: Left.

Masamune: Arr, this be a ship lassie. Ye be addressin' directions with the proper connotations.

Ashley: *sigh* Port.

*Masamune turns the car sharply to the right.*

Ashley: I said port!

Masamune: This BE port!

Ashley: This is starboard!

Masamune: Arr! Are ye questioning me directional skills?

Ashley: It's not questioning when you're flat-out wrong!

Masamune: Who be the notorious sea captain and who be the daughter of a mop?

Ashley: I'M NOT THE DAUGHTER OF A MOP!

Slort: That's true. You're thinking of a completely different timeline. I don't even think I'm in that one.

Masamune: There be so many of them... But he's still a dirty hobo!

Ashley: He's my dad! AND I SAID GO LEFT!

Masamune: Starboard?

Ashley: I'm done.

GORE-ILLA

Ramsey: Well this is the closest I could find...

*Ramsey enters Scott Smith's School of Medieval Blacksmithery.*

Ramsey: Um, hello?

Scott: What? Who goes there?

Ramsey: Yeah, I was wondering if you can buy some scrap metal off of me.

Scott: What? This isn't an orpahanage where you can just sell unwanted things! Get lost!

*Ramsey sighs as he turns to leave, but suddenly Scott swipes the leg from his hand.*

Scott: Ah! This is no ordinary metal! This is metal from a Mecha-Sonic. Long have I yearned for it- simple in structure and easily capable of forming... an army! A droid army!

Ramsey: Excellant! So you'll buy it?

Scott: Hell no, it's mine now!

Ramsey: That's not very fair.

EVIL Scientist Dude: Well we're all ready to... go?

*Upon seeing Ramsey, EVIL Scientist Dude takes out his pictures and flips through them.*

EVIL Scientist Dude: Two members in one day! Great!

Ramsey: Wha?

SteveT: (shudders) I think that's enough! ...No, just another breeze. Still need more Festivity Attender-reminder-ofs.

*A beeping is heard from outside. Peering through the window, SteveT sees Lynel and Straw-Man in the Lead Zeppelin.*

SteveT: Save the exposition for the ride!

*Everyone piles into the Lead Zeppelin, which rushes off eastward.*

Aither: Where exactly are we going?

Lynel: (shrugs)

*A series of exploding spears rain down, but miss the car due to Lynel's crazy driving.*

EVIL Scientist Dude: Not this guy again...

*Vlad watches from a building top, then hops down and lands on a motorcycle. The motorcycle zooms off in pursuit.*

Straw-Man: Oh no, no bounty hunter is gonna mess up my car!

Lynel: It's my car.

Straw-Man: Says who?

Lynel: Says this certficate of ownership! What do you have?

Straw-Man: A FIST! ...Travelling to your face!

*Straw-Man and Lynel grapple and lose control of the car, which in turn crashes into another out-of-control automobile.*

EVIL Scientist Dude: That damn minivan!

GORE: Hey, is that Masa?

*Vlad's motorcycle pulls up.*

SteveT

Narrator: EVIL Scientist Dude crawls out of the Lead Zeppelin, but immediately clambers back in.

EVIL Scientist Dude: Get this car movie?

All: EH?

EVIL Scientist Dude: Get this car moving!

GORE: Perhaps you failed to notice...

EVIL Scientist Dude: GET THIS CAR MOVING!

Ramsey: What's with this guy?

GORE: Mad scientist.

Ramsey: Oh.

EVIL Scientist Dude: GET THIS CAR MOVING! VLAD!

GORE: ... ... GET THIS CAR MOVING!

SteveT: Vlad?

GORE: Bounty hunter. Wants us dead.

Straw Man: No, Vlad's a vampire.

GORE: Bounty hunter.

Straw Man: I have books to prove it.

SteveT: Not now, Straw Man. GORE, define "us"

GORE: ...

SteveT: Oh, fine. I get the hint.

Narrator: SteveT walks out of the minivan and comes face to face with a wildly spinning spear.

SteveT (casually): I hear you want these guys dead.

Vlad: You are not on my contract. I advice you to be on your way, demon.

SteveT: Ok, here's how it goes. You're after my potential enemies. Here's your options: you can team up with me, you can give me a spear and race me to our victims, or you can get thrown very, very far.

Vlad: I don't have time for—HEY!

Narrator: SteveT yanks Vlad's motorcycle out from under him and throws it into the horizon, just barely missing by about two meters to the right.

Vlad: Don 't you know the villain's code?

SteveT: Ah, but revenge missions are exempted from standard procedure.

Vlad: So be it.

Narrator: Vlad lunges at Steve's shoulder with his spear. Steve does not react. The spear's tip deflects harmlessly over Steve's shoulder and the iron construct pulls it from Vlad's hand.

Vlad draws another spear, but again, Steve's body deflects the powerful thrust. This goes on for a while until Steve gets bored, digs the shaft of his newly acquired spear into Vlad's stomach, and flings the bounty hunter into the horizon. This time he makes the shot.

SteveT: Good spear...Normally I prefer axes, but as Musashi suggested, it's unwise to reject any tool at your disposal.

EVIL Scientist Dude: Hmm, it seems that maybe you won't kill us all after all.

SteveT: That's what you think.

ALL: Oh, Steve...You and your death threats....

GORE: To repeat: Hey, isn't that Masa?

Groaning figure in the minivan: Yarrrrrrrr

Luiigii of the Pipes

Narrator: Masamune crawls out of the minivan and turns to look at it.

Masamune: The S.S. Dodo 2! *draws sword* Ye'll be payin' fer this, fools!

EVIL Scientist Dude: No way! You hit us!

Masamune: I think not!

EVIL Scientist Dude: I think too!

Masamune: Not!

EVIL Scientist Dude: Too!

Straw-Man: Obviously this is all HIS FAULT! *points at Lynel*

Lynel: What?! You're dead! *tackles Straw-Man*

Masamune: Don't ye fight. Ye'll all pay...

Cataquackers: Cap'n! I can't feel my legs!

Masamune: Arr, not now! I be in the middle of a death threat!

Narrator: Ashley climbs out of the minivan.

Ashley: I should tell you that I think it's going to explode. Maybe you should--

SteveT: Minion!

EVIL Scientist Dude: OGer!

Masamune: What? That be me new navigator! How dare ye! *puts hand over Ashley's shoulder* Why, I ought be killin' yeh just fer... fer...

Narrator: Masamune notices that Ashley's shoulder isn't there. They all look around for a few seconds, then hear the sound of police sirens.

GORE: Aw shatmucker...

Lt. Snagret: Cap'n! We gotta be fleeing! Use the S.S. Dodo's remote!

Masamune: Arr, the remote! I almost forgot!

Narrator: Masamune pulls a remote from his pocket and presses a big red button on it. There is an explosion as the S.S. Dodo smashes through the wall of a really tall building nearby... and gets stuck halfway out. As this happens, the police pull up and form a perimeter around them.

Police Chief (into megaphone): This is the Rocket Police Force! Drop your weapons and put your hands in the air!

Masamune: Never! *is shot by tazer*

Aither: Okay, I'll-- *is shot by tazer*

EVIL Scientist Dude: I don't have a-- *is shot by tazer*

Narrator: The others quickly put their hands up, save for SteveT, who holds his spear across his shoulder, the birds and Slort, who are still trapped in the minivan.

SteveT: So I hear you guys have-- *is shot by tazer* --tazers. That tickles.

Police Officer: On the ground, freak!

SteveT: If I do that, I won't be able to get back up.

Police Officer: On the ground!

SteveT: You're not listening. My joints are kinda-- *is shot by gun* --rusty. Hey, don't do that.

Police Officer: Somebody get a Maggun on this guy!

SteveT: What's a--

Narrator: SteveT is knocked backwards by a magnetic force. He hits the van and is pinned to the side.

SteveT: Oh.

Police Officer: Round them up. All of them.

Narrator: And the minivan explodes.

Narrator: Meanwhile, Ashley is running fast out of town.

Ashley: Man, I left Slort behind...

Narrator: And running.

Luiigii of the Pipes

~In a secret underground lab in Rocketsville I~

Narrator: Magikoopa enters, trying to walk and use his N-Gage at the same time.

Magikoopa: Hah dah hum... hoo dah hoh...

Bomberman: Magikoopa, buddy!

Magikoopa: Heh? Oh, Dr. Bomberman. How's the patient today?

Bomberman: He's finished. It took a while, dredging him out of Hell and repairing all of those bite wounds, but he should be ready to go.

Magikoopa: Good, good. And you... *turns to Mecha Sonic (the original), who is leaning in the corner* One of your duplicates planted the picture on them, right?

Mecha Sonic: Should have.

Magikoopa: Eh, close enough. Now, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiise!

Narrator: A spotlight illuminates a giant test tube in front of Bomberman, to reveal...

Luigi_64: Uh... day-um, those lights be bright! Turn it down, foo!

Magikoopa: He's... perfect!

Narrator: The test tube drains and opens, and Luigi_64 steps out.

Luigi_64: Hey, homies. Whazzup?

Magikoopa: Uh, yo, E dog.

Luigi_64: It's G-dawg, foo.

Magikoopa: Sorry. So here's the, um, rep. Mecha Sonic ran into a bunch of hooligans who are acting awful similar to your old... posse.

Luigi_64: You mean 'dem strippers I hooked up with one night, heh heh.

Magikoopa: No, I mean the Party Goers.

Luigi_64: WHAT!? Those fools be whack! I was never part o' no wussy gang like dat!

Magikoopa: We were there, man. We saw you.

Luigi_64: Aw crap. Caught red-handed.

Magikoopa: Understandably, you did try to destroy them. And now I'm offering you a chance to destroy these wannabes too.

Luigi_64: Sweet! You gots some bombinator or somethin' I be usin'?

Magikoopa: No, we're going to go for something more... covert?

Luigi_64: Covert?

Magikoopa: Undercover.

Luigi_64: Like a spy! Badass!

Magikoopa: Yeah. So, Mecha Sonic slipped a picture of you into the set of pictures they've been using to gather these Pseudo Goers.

Luigi_64: Pseudo?

Magikoopa: Fake.

Luigi_64: Aw, dey all fake!

Magikoopa: FURTHERmore, our police force in Rocketsville II has just arrested them. You're going to go and 'break them out', and they'll have no choice but to accept you!

Luigi_64: I can do that, yo.

Magikoopa: I know you can. We've prepared a shuttle for you. It's on the 6th floor, west hall.

Luigi_64: Sweet! Peace out! *runs to the elevator*

Bomberman: Are you SURE this is a good idea?

Magikoopa: Trust me. Once Luigi_64 has destroyed these new Party Goers from the inside out, NOTHING will stop us from taking over the world. TRO shall be victorious!

Masamune

Masamune: The *taser* indignity *taser* of *taser* it all!

GORE: I dunno *taser* it actually makes me feel livelier *taser*

~MEANWHILE, AFTER ONLY TWO POINTLESS LINES!~

Ashley: At least I'm away, I can help slort later.

???: Hey.

Ashley: *turns around* Ack! Uh, is that you d-

Luigi_64: Yo babe, sup in the jiggy?

Ashley: I suspect not. Who are you?

Luigi_64: I'm da man of yo dreams, sweet thang.

Ashley: I'm gonna just walk away, alright?

Luigi_65: Don't do that, chick-a-dee. I'm looking for those Party Goers-types.

Ashley: They're being beaten by the police back there-

~MEANWHILE~

Police: *starts beating Strawman with a club, since nothing else was working*

Strawman: Police brutality! Police brutality!

~OKAY~

Ashley: - so they're a little busy.

Luigi_64: Good, I have to rescue them. Wanna come, baby doll?

Ashley: Not real-

Luigi_64: *scoops her up anyways, jumps in the air, and the jets in his feet fire off*

Ashley: You can fly!?

Luigi_64: I can? Sweet!

~AND... okay, you get it now~

Narrator: Everyone is now captured. All of them in handcuffs, except the birds and Slort, who are in cages. Steve is also still just attached to the metal. And Strawman's arms were removed for evidence.

Police Rocket: That's it for here, let's move out bo-

Luigi_64: YEEHA! *flies down*

Police Rocket: Oh. *looks down at papers in his hand* Oh my. Luigi 64 has uh... arrived. We cannot possibly stand aghast... no, against. Sorry. We cannot possibly stand against him. Leave the prisoners so we can escape en what?

Police Rocket 2: Masse.

PR1: Is that french or something?

PR2: It just means all of us at once!

PR1: Oh. Well why didn't it- I mean, I say so?

PR2: I dunno. Let's just go.

Narrator: In poorly played terror, they all run off at walking speed from the scene.

~after everyone is freed~

GORE: Hey look at this, the files say Luigi_64 here was one of the original first Party Goers!

Masamune: Wow, old skool. But I dunno, I just remember something....

~FLASHBACK~

Luigi64: Beh, this place ain't no good fo' no' playah hata dawg like me! Time for me to slick jiggy outta here, lick smack!

*he tries to disappear in a puff of smoke, but it doesn't work, and he reappears in the same spot, looking like an idiot*

L64: *clicks his shoes together three times* L is Real, L is Real, L is Real...

*looks down*

L64: L is dead. *in normal voice* Oh, why did I not take the opportunity to seize the graceful light of Heav'n when I did'st have the chance, that I might not be standing here now, hopeless, in the Bottomless Pit, in the Eternal Fire? O, great God Almighty, is it not possible to yet spare mercy upon this so-

Nearby Villain: We're breakin' outta here in 5 minutes to take over Heaven.

L64: *in his typical voice* Coo' Let's roll.

*he gets in line behind a procession of shady looking characters on their way somewhere*

Hell64: Hah! Sayonara, Satan dudes! L is outta here! *taps shoulder of guy in front of him* So, how do we get out?

X (of the present): The boss will get us out easy.

Hell64: Awesome. And who is this boss?

*they all enter the chamber, to see... Dark Ditto!*

Ditto: Well... look what we have here... The guy who used to call me unflattering names!

Hell64: Wow. I ain't never been screwed THIS fast.

*gets thrown out, falls over cliff to very lowest level of Hell, and lands in one of the Beast's three mouths, which begins to chew him for eternity*

~END FLASHBACK~

Masamune: Probably nothing. Wait, that's not even my flashback.

~FLASHBACK!~

Masa: *looks at screen* Hmm... a new entry... Luigi64... O_O I didn't know heck went so deep...

Fuzzball: *looks* It wasn't Lucifer, someone must've tossed him down there.

Masa: *shudders as he watches Luigi64 suffer through CENSOR CENSORED CENSOR CENSORED CENSOR CENSORED CENSOR CENSORED CENSOR* Oi... no one deserves THAT...

~END FLASHBACK!~

Masamune: Eh, might not even be this timeline.

GORE: What?

Masamune: Umm, I mean, time SHARE. I was thinking about my time share. It seems worthless, I should just sell it.

GORE: Oh. Well

Masamune: *looks at wrecked minivan* Sigh, it looks as though the S.S. Dodo 2 will never fly again...

Ashley: It never flew in the first-

Lt. Snagret: Let 'em have his moment.

Luigi_64: So like, we're gonna go gatehr more Party Goers or crap, yeah?

GORE: Oh yeah. Who's in?

Masamune: I wanna get my ship back.

Ashley: I don't really care.

SteveT: I hate all of you equally.

Vlad: I don't even know why I'm still here. *leaves*

Slort: The goomanity of it all!

Luigi_64: I ain't going fo' dis PG thang.... kidding kidding, I'm in man, yo yo.

GORE: Masamune! We need your help to save the world.

Masamune: You know, half the time I was a villain anyways. Or doing my own thing, you know?

GORE: What if you joined us, but only for your own selfish desire to get your ship back.

Masamune: Okay, I can live with that.

GORE: And you Ashley, you want to come because it means you won't have people accusing you of looking for your father.

Ashley: *groans* Oh fine.

GORE: And SteveT, you-

SteveT: Are just coming along so I can backstab you all, I know I know. Stupid team-uniting moments. Those accursed Festivity Attenders did it all the time!

GORE: So be it. We shall be the Fellowship of the uh... OG.

Masamune: That sucks. Let's just be the OGers or something.

GORE-ILLA

EVIL Scientist Dude: So what now?

Masa: I don't know. I'm not even sure where we are.

GORE: I think we're in Rocketsville II, which shall hereafter be referred to as Vegasville to avoid confusion. I think I know the perfect way to test out our knew team.

Ramsey: And what's this?

GORE: We're going to reclaim Las Vegas.

SteveT: What? You'd be declaring war against Team Rocket Omega!

GORE: So be it. I may be too old and weak to fight, but I'm sure all of you together could take it from Bomberman. And then well head to Rocketsville and take Magikoopa out.

Ashley: ...This is utterly impossible. I think I'll quit this group again.

GORE: No! You are all stronger then you think! Team Rocket is beatable!

Straw-Man: Of course! In fact, I'd easily be able to take all of America from Team Rocket and Europe from Lupus alone! I just don't feel like it!

GORE: Perfect! Now all we need is a plan!

Luigi_64: Yo sons, I got us a sweet-ass plan...

SteveT

Luigi_64: Arright, bitches, here it goes: We rent out a hotel, hire some hookers, find a few bags of "party favors," if you know what I mean, and throw the sweetest party Vegasville ever had, yo. Word?

All: Blank stares

Ashley: Clearly conquering cities isn't your forte.

Luigi_64: Don't be hatin', sweetie.

Slort: All we really have to do is find Team Rocket's Command Post and invade it.

Straw Man: Which we'd be inside right now if someone didn't have to go and save us...

Masa: The Rocket Building be right over thar.

Narrator: Masamune points across the street to a very annoying restaurant. In fact, he points to what probably would be the most annoying place to eat in the entire world, except that it's part of a chain. It is called Johnny Rocket's. Waiters in fifties-style paper hats dance to songs long forgotten, except in the general vicinity of Johnny Rocket's. And Richard Simmons videos. You get the idea. SteveT starts humming along to "Ain't No Mountain High Enough"....maliciously.

Luigi_64: Ok, new plan: We rent out a hotel, hire some hookers, find a few bags of "party favors," if you know what I mean, and throw the sweetest party Vegasville ever had, yo. Word?

EVIL Scientist Dude: That's the exact same as the last plan.

Luigi_64: Is not. Why you be up in my face, old man?

Straw Man: It's true, that was a different plan.

Liger: Well know EVIL Scientist Dude knows he's right....

Narrator: Straw Man tackles Liger, and a dust cloud forms around them.

SteveT: ain't no mountain high enough....

Masamune: To be blunt: I want that jukebox dead.

SteveT: You better not be talking about me.

Masamune: Why? Have you been singing?

SteveT: Umm...of course not.

Ashley: Well, we may as well check it out.

GORE: Yes, perhaps we'll find a secret staircase leading up to Team Rocket's Headquarters.

Lugi_64: Ok, yeah. Those waitresses are kinda hot. And I'm always game for a burger, yo. Extra buns.

SteveT: *Punches Luigi_64*

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