Gamehiker Member OG 3 Page 4

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Author: Masamune

Luigi: This is a nice ship.

Ashley: It's just an intergalactic bus.

Luigi: Eh.

Ashley: Look, the Swordefeller is down there.

Luigi: Eh.

Ashley: We should land.

----

Slort: [Oh, Luigi!]

Luigi: It's all right, you're safe now. What are you doing with Masa? How did you even get in this OG?

Slort: [I was so worried about you. Masa told me terrible things.]

Luigi: What things?

Slort: [He said you have turned to the dark side . . . that you worked for the Ushatarians.]

Luigi: Masamune is showing off to you, he doesn't care about goombas. He's trying to turn you against me!

Slort: [He made me a crew member! I got dental!]

Luigi: You? Him? Ha!

Slort: [Luigi, all I want is your payroll again.]

Luigi: Money won't save you, Slort. Only my new powers can do that.

Slort: [At what cost? You are a good person. Don't do this.]

Luigi: I won't lose you the way I lost my sanity in another OG or my mop in yet another! I've become more powerful than any OGer has ever dreamed of and I've done it for you. To protect you.

Slort: [Come away with me. Hook up with Rebe. Leave everything else behind while we still can.]

Luigi: Rebe!?

Slort: Yeah, Masamune mumbled it in his sleep. Apparently in another OG, she is your wife.

Luigi: Don't you see, we don't have to pay attention to these stupid OGs! I have brought peace to the forums. I am more powerful than the Admins. I can overthrow them, and together you and I can rule the forums. Make things the way we want them to be.

Slort: [I don't believe what I'm hearing... Masa was right. You've changed.]

Luigi: I don't want to hear any more about Masamune, he's too important in this OG as it is. And he doesn't even have a Caykforce.

Slort: [I don't know you anymore. Luigi, you're breaking my mind. Don't leave me here all alone. Don't go where I can't follow.]

Luigi: Because of Masa? ~looks up to see Masamune~

Slort:[ Because of what you've done . . . what you plan to do. Stop, stop now. Come back! I need you.]

Luigi: LIAR! *points at Masa*

Slort: *sees him* [No! Not yet!]

Luigi: You're with him. You've betrayed me! You brought him here to kill me!

Slort: [You came here, remember?]

Luigi: Don't use your crazy goomba logic on me! *force chokes him*

Masamune: Let him go, Luigi... let her go.

Golem: Do goombas even HAVE necks?

~Fred throws a rock at Luigi and he releases him~

Luigi: You turned him against me!

Masamune: You have done that yourself.

Luigi: You will not take him from me.

Masamune: Your anger and your lust for power have already done that. You have allowed Murasame to twist your posts until now . . . until now you have become just a cheap knock off of him!

Luigi: Don't lecture me, Masamune. I see through the lies of the OGers. I do not fear the dark side as you do. I have brought peace, justice, freedom, and security to my new Forums!

Masamune: Your new Forums?

Luigi: Don't make me kill you.

Masamune: HA! Like you could.

Luigi: If you're not with me, you're my enemy.

Masamune: We established that, dude.

Luigi: This can mean only one thing! Long epic dramatic fight scene! Ashley, now!

Ashley: *presses the eject button and they both fly off the ship into a nearby volcano*

Author: SOAP

(Reaching through the bars, MJ garabs something off the ground and chucks it at Splog's head.)

Splog: [Hey! What was that for?]

MJ: I know you're not Slort! Now speak English!

Splog: [I'm not Slort... But I'm not the Splog you're thinking of either.]

MJ: [Yeah prove it!]

Splog: [You can understand my language?]

MJ: [Yeah. Didn't you just switch to English, just now?]

Splog: [Actually you just spoke Goombelli.] *cringes* [And butchering the whole language in the process.]

MJ: [Really!? Coolness!]

Splog: *shudders* [I wonder what caused your sudden gift of lingua franca.]

(Splog turned over the object that MJ had thrown at MJ's head.)

Splog: [Hmm... looks like a simple picture book.... but yet it seems to fill me with vast amounts of knowlege of all that has ever been and ever will be...] *gasp* [I know the ending of the OG! And you actually play a key part in the climatic twist.... Surely there must be some mistake.]

MJ: [I could of told you that withot reading a dumb book...]

(Splog waddles back over and mutters to himself as he frees MJ from the cage.)

MJ: *stretches* [That's better. Now let's go end this OG once and for all.]

Marin: *groans* Mary Kate...

Splog: [Seems like your sister's coming to.]

MJ: [Leave her. She's safer here anyways... As the picture book foretells.]

Splog: [Yeah right..] *rolls eyes*

(MJ and Splog leave, heading towards Weirdamonium.)

[Several hours later...]

Marin: *moans* No! Mary Kate... no... NO! *wakes up suddenly* Huh!? Mary Kate! I must save her!

(Marin gets up off the ground and runs in the direction SteveT and the other went, waving her amllet maniacally in the air.)

Marin: Don't worry Mary Kate! Your big sister's coming to get you!

Author: Luigi of the Pipes

~Masamune and Luigi lock swords. Ashley fires several more lightsabers onto the platform they're standing on.~

Ashley: Just in case.

Masamune: Who makes all these?!

Luigi: I do! ~sword clash~ And I practice with them... ~clash~ Three hours a day!

Masamune: You need to find yourself a girl, mate. ~clash clash~ Or perhaps you already have, and are otherwise unable to entertain her. ~clash~ You're not a eunich, are you?

~Luigi kicks Masamune away.~

Luigi: You STOLE my girl. And I practice with them... ~clash~ So that when I meet a pirate, I can KILL it!

~A bit more fighting.~

Masamune: I have failed you, Luigi. I was never able to teach you to be a villain in the other OGs.

Luigi: I should have known you were plotting to take my lackey . . .

Masamune: From the Plot Hole!!! Luigi, all Plot Holes are evil.

Luigi: From the OGer's point of view! From my point of view, the OGers are evil.

Masamune: Well, then you are lost!

~Masamune and Luigi go hardcore with their strikes, giving neither a second to pause. Luigi kicks Masa's jaw and backs away a second.~

Luigi: You hesistate. The flaw of having too much to do and in the end doing nothing.

~Luigi swings at Masamune, but he recovers and jumps over the attack.~

Masamune: You always go for the kill. The flaw of not being able to leave something open for others to continue it.

Luigi: RAAAAAA!

~Attacks go frenzied again.~

~Meanwhile, Golem is dragging Slort into the cabin with his scarf.~

Fred: Not like that, you fool! You'll damage him!

Golem: Well, how else should I do it?

Fred: *huff* Fine. We'll do this together.

~Fred and Golem pick Slort up, but he jumps out of their hands and dives into the volcano.~

Golem: Well that was pointless.

~Meanwhile, Masamune and Luigi fight on a rock that is drifting toward a lavafall... inside of a volcano. Yeah.~

Luigi: ~swings at Masa~

Masamune: Stop that! ~bats Luigi's laser sword away~ Seriously! I'm trying to keep my grip here!

Luigi: ~swings at Masa~

Masamune: I HATE YOU!!!

Luigi: Dude, that's my line.

Masamune: Oh yeah? Well...

~Masamune jumps off the rock and on to a smaller, flatter one floating in the lava. Luigi runs down the side of the rock and lands on top of Slort, who's floating in the lava.~

Slort: [I can't throw him off. Sorry. No hard feelings?]

Masamune: I'm gonna win anyway.

Luigi: Ha!

~Clash clash clash~

Luigi: This is the end for you, Masamune.

~Luigi flips on to the rock with Masamune. Their swords are like blurs. They clash faster and faster, and just as Luigi begins to omg win, Masamune jumps off of the rock and on to the volcano's rim.~

Masamune: It's over, Luigi! I have the high ground.

Luigi: You underestimate my power!

Masamune: Don't do it!

Luigi: ~jumps at the rim~

Masamune: ~shoots him~

~Luigi falls and cracks his back on the edge of the rim. He rolls off and on to a little shore leading into the lava.~

Luigi: .... you cheated.

Masamune: Pirate.

Luigi: MASAMUNE!!!

Masamune: YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!

MJ: I'M THE CHOSEN ONE, DAMMIT!

Masamune: You were supposed to bring balance to the OGs, not plunge them into your forums! You were my co-admin... I tolerated you... But I won't re-admin you!

Luigi: I HATE YOU!!! ~bursts into flames~

Masamune: ~anxious sweating~

~Luigi stands up and marches purposefully toward Masamune.~

Masamune: Wait, what?

Luigi: You should know I can't be burned.

Masamune: But... but... I don't know what I'm supposed to do now!

~Luigi lifts his sword to strike Masamune, but a beam hits him in the back. Luigi screams and falls over. Slort stands on the edge of the rim and blows yellow smoke out of his mouth.~

Slort: [I didn't want to do that.]

Luigi: Eeeeaugh!

Slort: [Let's go.]

~Slort walks back to the ship. Masamune watches Luigi intently, then runs after him.~

Author: SOAP

(Once Masa and Slort were gone, loud imperial-sounding music starts playing as a shadowy figure in a Darth Vader git-up appears...)

Luigi: Ugh... MJ! I'm too tired for this...

(MJ takes Ashley by the arm and throws into the Lava.)

Luigi: Ashley! No!

Ashley: *on a ledge below them* Actually I'm fine.

Luigi: I can almost hear her like she's still alive...

Ashley: I am alive...

Luigi: I will avenge you Ashley!

Ashley: Whatever. Just remember to come and get me when you're done.

Luigi: MJ, what do you have to say for yourself!

MJ: *wheezes* Luigi... *wheezes* I am your cousin...

Luigi: Yeah. So?

MJ: *takes off the helmet* Well, blood is thicker than water!

Luigi: And lava burns.

(Luigi kicks MJ in the leg, sending him over the edge of platform. But MJ pulls Luigi along with him. As they're falling, MJ grabs unto platform and Luigi grabs MJ by the foot.)

Luigi: Well... this is awkward.

Author: SteveT

MJ: Hey! Let go!

Luigi: No! Never!

MJ: *shakes his foot* Seriously...

Ashley: Hey, umm...it's not really that dangerous

Luigi: Quiet, honey. Daddy's in the middle of a fight right now.

*MJs shoe slips off*

Luigi: Hey! That was keeping me from...oh...*falls*

MJ: My precious shoe!

Luigi: *while falling, looks at the shoe and frowns. He tosses the shoe away*

Luigi: AAAAAAAAAH! *lands in the lava*

MJ: My shoe! My precious shoe! *shoes melts and sinks into the lava* That was expensive, too.

SteveT: *Steps up to the edge.* Well, well, well...

Ashley: What are you doing here?

SteveT: Arriving just in time, it would seem.

Luigi: Help! Help! I can't swim! *thrashes around in the lava*

SteveT: I can help your father.

Ashley: That won't be necessary, thanks.

SteveT: Oh, I'm afraid it is. I can save him from the lava, replace his lost limbs, and he'll be just as strong as ever. All you have to do is pledge yourself to my service.

Ashley: He's fine. He can't burn.

Steve: Really?

Ashley: *nods*

Steve: Want to...be my minion anyway?

Ashley: *shakes head*

Steve: Well, no matter. I have a new minion now. *Points at Mary-Kate*

MJ: *hanging onto the ledge* Why are you so interested in having her as a minion?

SteveT: Oh, that's a question for a later time.

MJ: Well, no matter when you decide to tell the story, it's still creepy.

Steve: Lynel?

*Lynel digs his claws into MJ's hands*

MJ: Ow! Hey!

Lynel: Long live the king! *lets go*

MJ: *falling* NOOOO!

Author: SOAP

(Suddenly, Marin appears out of nowhere and whacks SteveT from behind, sending him flying into the Lava.)

Steve: AHHHHHH! *plop!*

MJ: Serves you right! *hits him upside the head*

Steve: Ow!

MJ: Oh yeah. And before I forget... *takes back Star Sword* Thanks.

Marin: Um, why aren't they melting?

Ashley/Mary Kate: It's not lava. It's just very hot water with red food coloring.

Marin: Oh Mary Kate! I found you... er, which is which?

(Mary Kate and Ashley exchange glances.)

Ashley/Mary Kate: :P We ain't tellin'!

(That said the two girls grab hands and go running down the corridor.)

Marin: Oh great! Now she wants to go and play games... *chases after them*

Author: Murasame

Mysterious Silhouette: ~hangs up phone~ Seriously, does that boy NEVER take his calls?

Random Minion: I imagine he's too poor to have a phone.

Mysterious Silhouette: That's true. I guess I'll just have to take DRASTIC ACTION!

~DRASTIC ACTION is taken.~

Random Minion: NO! You made a promise, Mr. Confusingcus! You promised that only I would be on your speed dial!

Mysterious Silhouette: Oh relax. I was just going to send you to deal with it. It is time to reveal yourself, my random minion.

Random Minion: Yes Master.

***

Rebe: Masamune! There's trouble in Washington!

Masamune: Full speed!

~The S.S. Swordefeller flies to Washington. Splog clings to the bottom all remora-like.~

Marin: Waaaaaaaait!

MJ: Ha ha! I get to be on my own for longer!

***

Ashley: Tee hee... ha ha... giggle giggle... BAM!

~Ashley punches Mary Kate in the gut.~

Mary Kate: Owwwwww! Why are you doing this?

Ashley: That's for copying me and being too innocent for death. If I were you, I'd just stay here. ~walks back to the volcano~

Mary Kate: Ohhhh...

***

~Luigi floats down the lava river, laying on his back on a rock. He's really tired from intense swordfighting, getting shot, cracking his back on stone, getting beamed by his own best friend, getting attacked, falling in to lava, trying to swim, and crawling on to this rock which is careening toward the lavafall. He lays down all Boromir-like and goes to sleep...~

~When Luigi wakes up, he's lying on the rim of the volcano, with Ashley next to him.~

Luigi: I know your face... Ashley.

Ashley: I remember the forest. The taste of mushrooms. The smell of the trees in the early morning.

Luigi: Rebe dancing... ~begins to cry~ She had ribbons in her hair... If ever I was to marry someone, it woulda been her... ~sob~ It woulda been her! If only I hadn't gone to evil.

Ashley: ~hugs Luigi~ I'm glad you're here with me, Luigi. Here at the end of all things...

Luigi: ~looks at Ashley~ So you know.

Ashley: I know. I CAN still fight.

Luigi: I can't let you. I'm going to save you. There's a suit of armor claiming that you're his minion and an identical copy of you that's bound to cause loads of confusion on down the line. I must... send you back.

Ashley: ~sigh~ What else would you have me do, Luigi?

Luigi: ~holds her chin with his hand~ I would have you smile again.

~Ashley smiles a very sad smile, then begins to cry.~

Luigi: Here at last ends our relationship. I will not say do not cry, for not all tears are evil.

~Ashley turns and hugs Luigi again.~

Ashley: I love you, Dad.

Luigi: I know.

~Hug.~

Ashley: Um... why are you touching my butt?

Luigi: I'm not.

~Both turn to look at Random Minion, who shrugs and backs away.~

Random Minion: Sorry.

Luigi: It's time to go... Don't worry, if I do end up marrying Rebe in this timeline, we should meet again in... ~checks character bios~ Seven years.

Ashley: Yeah.

~Ashley is written out of the story.~

Luigi: ~bawl~

~Random Minion puts a hand on Luigi's shoulder. He takes off his mask to reveal... Murasame.~

Murasame: It's time. The end of the OG draws near.

Luigi: I know. Though I do not know if I have the heart.

Murasame: Let's go, my son.

***

Vorpal: There isn't any time! Yami and I can handle this!

Kuria: I'll never forgive myself if you die!

Vorpal: Then I promise I won't.

~Kuria reluctantly climbs into the Time-Traveling Monkey. GORE and EVIL Scientist Dude sit in the front seats.~

EVIL Scientist Dude: ~straps on a pair of goggles~ It's time to go... BACK TO THE FUTURE!

GORE: You mean Forward to the Past.

EVIL Scientist Dude: That's just stupid.

~Time travel to GMOG1.~

GORE: Okay, this is around the point you lost the Pie Arrow. You just need to grab it and we'll be fulfilling our destinies.

Kuria: Right.

~Kuria jumps out of the Time-Traveling Monkey. EVIL Scientist Dude notices something.~

EVIL Scientist Dude: Oh my.

GORE: What?

EVIL Scientist Dude: We're... um... out of gas.

GORE: WHAT?!

~Kuria jumps back into the Time-Traveling Monkey.~

Kuria: Got it. Let's go.

EVIL Scientist Dude: Oh no! And I've forgotten how to make the fuel! We'll have to find my past self and ask him, because only he can now save us!

~GORE takes a tank of gas out of the trunk of the Time-Traveling Monkey and puts it in the gas tank.~

EVIL Scientist Dude: Oh fine. Ruin my fun.

~BACK TO THE FUTURE~

Vorpal: There's too many!

Yami Yoshi: May you fight bravely!

~Vorpal and Yami Yoshi battle the Caykzors, to no end. The S.S. Swordefeller appears on the horizon.~

Masamune: Yee haw! The calvalry's arrived!

Rebe: I thought you were a pirate.

Masamune: Sorry.

~The S.S. Swordefeller begins blasting Caykzors, also to no end. Masamune jumps out, sticks the Master Pie to the end of his sword, and begins swinging it at Caykzors. The Time-Traveling Monkey arrives. Kuria jumps out.~

Kuria: Time to end this... ~notches Pie Arrow~

~Yami's and Golem's Caykforces begin to glow. One-Winged Murasame approaches on the horizon, badass as ever, Luigi hanging to his foot. They land on the deck of the S.S. Swordefeller, and Luigi crawls into the corner to sulk.~

One-Winged Murasame: At last.

~There is a flash of light, and all of the Caykzors are destroyed. Roy crawls away to try and be the main villain in the next GMOG.~

One-Winged Murasame: We duel.

~Rebe, Fred, and Golem all charge at One-Winged Murasame, but he easily takes them down.~

Rebe/Fred/Golem: Uuuuaghh!

~Masamune and Vorpal leap on to the S.S. Swordefeller, but they barely hold their own.~

Masamune: No! My six hundred year feud... it can't end like this!

~MJ, Marin, and Mary Kate fly in on an intergalactic bus, but they are no match.~

Marin: This is freaking ridiculous!

~Kuria, Yami, GORE... they too fall. SteveT, Strawman, and Lynel, rather than do something stupid like fight One-Winged Murasame, do something smart like steal everyone's wallets while they're too weak to fight back. And then, they all get back up.~

Vorpal: Come on guys! Let's use the power of friendship and teamwork and all that crap!

~They charge.~

One-Winged Murasame: Why must they come to me... to die?

Author: Masamune

~Murasame leans down to touch Marin's head~

Mj: You!

Murasame: Do you sleep still? Wait!

MJ: Stop!

Murasame: Do not be hasty, boy... I can see this girl's dreams... Oceans... Oceans... Oceans... Oceans... Oceans as far as the eye can see. And a duck, I don't get that. They are vast seas... None can swim across them... They yield no fish to catch... What did the Caykzors say? ...That they would flood the world?

Vorpal: Did not.

Murasame: And they left behind confectionary sattelites who would soon launch it? How ridiculous... Don't you see? All of you...

~Everyone looks around~

Murasame: ~shouting~ Your desserts destroyed you!

MJ: You won't win!

Murasame: I have been waiting for you, boy. For one like you... Yes... For the so called 'Chosen One'. Do not betray my expectations. Fight them, Luigi.

Luigi: In case you missed it, I just had this big battlescene, and I-

Murasame: DO TI!

Luigi: *sulks* Okay MJ. *ignites laser sword*

~MJ puts all his emotions and energy into the fight, swinging like a madman. Luigi just yawns and swings his laser sword while fixing some tea with his free hand. The laser sword is finally knocked out of his hand and he puts his hands up in mock surrender~

MJ: That was close!

Masamune: During that boring display, he went on top of that building!

~Masamune leaps to the helm and flies the ship up next to the building. They all single file climb on the building. Except Steve, Lynel, and Strawman who steal the ship~

Steve: Suckers!

~But enough of that~

Murasame: Your surely are the Mustached Plumber reborn.

MJ: Well I am his son.

Murasame: My country lay within a vast desert. When the sun rose into the sky, a burning wind punished my lands, searing the world. And when the moon climbed into the dark of night, a frigid gale pierced our homes.

Masamune: Dude, we lived in SCOTLAND. We never lived anywhere like that. Except for the Arabian Knights gig we did, that was fun. Though I should have wished to MEET my true love instead of slipping and making all the girls think I was their's... Stupid genie interpreting things wrong.

Murasame: *ignores him* No matter when it came, the wind carried the same thing... the scent of confectionary treats. But the winds that blew across the green fields of Scotland brought something other than suffering and ruin. I coveted that wind, I suppose. That's why I stole it! *holds up bag of winds*

Yami: Hey! You can't just put the wind in a bag! It's a wild creature that has to go on it's migratory paths and live its own lifes and give birth to little blusters and dust devils!

Murasame: Shut up. *throws a rock at his head*

Yami: Ow! *falls over*

Murasame: It can only be fate. That here I would bring you unwitting twerps with the Caykforce into my presence.

Luigi: Wait what?

Murasame: A three-layered twerp cake! *flies around and throws Golem and Luigi on top of Yami*

~In a bright flash, the Caykforce assembles itself into three cake pieces arranged in a triangle~

~thunder cracks and rain starts falling~

Murasame: So it begins.

Fred: Hey look, the rain is reviving the caykzors!

Kuria: I found ab unch of businessmen and armed them with arrows. *shrugs*

Mary Kate: What's going on down there!?

Marin: Shall I describe it to you... or would you like me to fetch you a box?

Mary Kate: Not funny.

Slort: [Their armor is weak at the neck... and under the icing]

Murasame: Foolish cakes! Foolish OGers! You will all bow to me soon! *he goes towards the Caykforce* Whoever touches it will have their utmost desire granted!

EVIL Scientist Dude: He who touches it will have whatever he desires granted... That is what you said, is it not, Murasame? Cakes of the Caykforce! Here what I desire! I want a private research station, in a big city. Serveral stories, lots of researchers. No wait, outside the city. There should be perpetual thunderstorms so I can say diabolical phrases followed by lightning and thunder. And I want funding, more funding that I can have FUNding with!

Murasame: *twitch* This is foolish... a future for you? *starts laughing* Meh heh, ha ha, hee hee... MWAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Golem: What are you laughing at Murasame? You're insane!

Murasame: Very well then, allow me to show you you're future. Yes... Allow me to show you... Just what hope you have... See how much your precious Caykforce is worth!

EVIL Scientist Dude: Well, I'm planning to sell it on eBay.

Golem: *snatches Kuria's bow* I'll use this bow to cover you, Yami. Attack him as best you can.

Yami: Do I have to?

Golem: Yes. We'll take him together.

Yami: I was about to say that. I'll have you know my power has doubled since last time, Murasame.

Murasame: Good! Double the power, twice the fall.

~shift scene to another room~

Masamune: Who am I, Dodo?

Dodo: *strapping armor on him* You are our captain, sir.

Masamune: And do you trust your captain?

Dodo: No, sir. Not even with my paycheck.

Masamune: Where is the plot and the writer...

Dodo: I'm pretty sure this scene has been done.

Masamune: Okay. So it is before the walls of- err...

Dodo: Mama's Home Cooked Pie HQ.

Masamune: Yes, that. So it is before the walls of *cringes* that place that the doom of our time shall be decided...

~Down below, a Caykzor climbs on top of a car and roars a battlecry~

~On the walls~

Mary Kate: Well, MJ. If it's luck you live by, let it hope it lasts the night.

Marin: Don't worry MJ, your sisters will make sure you don't do something stupid.

Mary Kate: Let's hope they last the night...

MJ: Umm, okay. *walks away*

~Elsewhere~

Murasame: Heh heh... The wind... It is blowing... *reaches around and grabs Fred*

Fred: Oops? *drops the now empty bag of winds*

Murasame: Idiot.

Fred: Yeah so like, I have a battle to win. *runs over by Kuria*

~on the highest part of the wall~

Vorpal: So we get to be awesome and just stand up here?

Masamune: Yeah, we're like... the people in charge. So we don't have to fight until we're winning.

Vorpal: Dude, I like this.

Rebe: So are you going to send me down with the women and children?

Masamune: Nah.

Rebe: Darn.

-------------

OoC: If I succeeded in confusiing you all....Golem and Yami are taking on Murasame, Luigi is nearby. Masamune, Vorpal, Rebe, and Dodo are standing away from the fighting shouting orders and being useless. MJ, Marin, Mary Kate, Fred, Kuria, and Slort are down there having to actually do the fighting. No idea where Splog is. Steve and his lackies are probably halfway to Vegas with the S.S. Swordefeller and everyone's wallets.

Author: GORE-ILLA

*Yami holds up a blade.*

Yami: Now we duel.

Murasame: Have you even held a sword before?

Yami: Not once.

*Murasame lunges at Yami Yoshi, and he falls back. Golem tries to shoot a Pie Arrow from behind, but Murasame flips out of the way.*

Murasame: Your moves are clumsy, Golem... too predictable. You'll have to do better. LIKE YOUR MOM HAHA!!!

*Murasame is pummeled with arrows.*

Murasame: Stop that.

*Murasame slams down on Golem and knocks him out. Then he focuses his attack on Yami.*

Murasame: I sense great fear in you, Yami. You have hate, you have anger and possibly herpes, but you don't use them.

Yami: Damn, shut up already!

*Yami attacks even fiercerly until he slices Murasame's hands off with his sword.*

Murasame: How the hell did you do that?

Yami: Not even I'm sure.

*Yami holds both his and Murasame's swords towards Murasame's neck like a pair of scissors. Vorpal grins.*

Vorpal: Good, Yami, good. I knew you could do it. Kill him. Kill him now!

Murasame: No! No!

Yami: I shouldn't...

Vorpal: Do it!

Yami: Well if you insist!

*Yami decapitates Murasame.*

Yami: I couldn't stop myself.

Vorpal: You did well, Yami. He was too dangerous to be alive. Even though he's immortal and will revive himself in a few minutes, the galaxy will have a quick moment of peace.

Yami: Yes, but he was an unarmed prisoner.

Vorpal: It is only natural. He did absolutely nothing to offend you even slightly, and you wanted revenge. It wasn't the first time, Yami. Remember what you told me about your cheesecake and the Canadians. Now, we must leave before he comes back.

Luigi: Not so fast. You're under arrest, Vorpal in the name of the Ushatarian Empire.

Vorpal: Are you threatening me Master Hobo?

Luigi: I also plan to blackmail, extort from and abuse you, but I'm starting with a threat.

*Vorpal lunges forward and begins lightsabering with Luigi. Soon Luigi tumbles onto the floor at the edge of the tower.*

Vorpal: Come back to the good side, Luigi! I'll throw in a free toaster! You don't even know who you're working for!

Luigi: Never! I'll never join you!

Vorpal: Murasame never told you what happened to the Mysterious Silhouette, did he?

Luigi: He told me enough! He told me you shot him! I remember his story clearly...

Flashback:

*Vorpal walks up from a booth in a bar when the Mysterious Silhouette comes towards him with a gun and forces him back to his seat.*

Mysterious Silhouette: <Going somewhere, Vorpal?>

Vorpal: As a matter of fact, I was just about to see your boss Mysterious Silhouette.

Mysterious Silhouette:

Vorpal: Oh. You musta lost weight or something. Anyway, tell yourself that I've got the new Party Goers comics.

Mysterious Silhouette: <If you give them to me now, I may forget that you exist.>

Vorpal: I don't have them with me, and I need to color them. Tell yourself-

Mysterious Silhouette: <I'm through with you! I'll put a price on your head so large, you won't even be able to go near a civilized system! Maybe I could take your sword instead...>

Vorpal: Over my dead body.

Mysterious Silhouette: <That's the idea.>

*Vorpal blasts Mysterious Silhouette with his concealed gun, and he falls over on the table. Wait... is taht what happened? Suddenly time rewinds. Instead Mysterious Silhouette fires his gun first, but Vorpal moves his head to the side in some impossible manner, then immediately blasts Mysterious Silhouette. No, no, did it happen this way? Time rewinds again, and this time the second event happens at a faster rate this time to make it look like they both fired at the same time. Whatever.

Vorpal: No, Luigi! I am the Mysterious Silhouette! All along you thought you were serving some evil mastermind, but it was me all along!

Luigi: No! That's not true! That's impossible!

Vorpal: Search your feelings. You know it be true. I am Darth Confusingous, and I have manipulated all you villains to your ends!

Luigi: Grrr... You will die!

*Luigi fires Force Lightening at Vorpal, but he reflects it back at him off of his sword. Yami returns from the vending machine with a soda.*

Luigi: Yami! Help me! He's the evil Gamehacker Lord!

Vorpal: No, you don't understand! He's the evil hobo we swore to destroy!

Yami: Hmm...

*Yami slices off Vorpal's hand.*

Vorpal: AUGH

Luigi: Heh heh he-

*Yami slices off Luigi's hand too.*

Luigi: Hey!

*Vorpal and Luigi both hold a sword in their remaning hands, then they strike at the same time to cut both of Yami's hands off.*

Yami: That's smarts!

*Golem drops down to protect Yami, but accidentally cuts off both his arms.*

Masamune: Hey, how dare ye have several sword fights without me! En- AUGH MY HANDS!!!

*Yami, Golem, Masamune, Luigi and Vorpal tumble off the tower. As they fall, the OGers hold swords in their teeth to cut off Luigi's and Vorpal's remaining hands until they land on the pile of Caykzors They're absorbed into the Caykzors, but the overload of power causes them all to instantly explode.*

Masamune: How predictable. Now back to the figh- AUGH MY LEGS!!!

*MJ, Marin, Mary Kate, Fred, Kuria and Rebe jump into the battle. They all swordfight until everyone is missing their hands. Then they start cutting off each other's legs. Soon they're all armless, legless stumps lying in the battlefield.*

Yami: This did not work well.

GORE: Well I got ignored so I guess I'm safe.

*Several swords fly at GORE immediately, chopping down his arms and legs in seconds.*

GORE: I'm sad now.

*Slort, Splog and Dodo point and laugh from their lounge chairs.*

Masamune: What now?

Vorpal: Let's sing to pass the time. On the road again...

Fred: Annoying yet nostalgic.

*Murasame arrives with Steve, Straw Man and Lynel.*

Murasame: Pick up my apprentice so we can leave.

Steve: Which one's your apprentice?

Straw Man: I am.

*Luigi starts bobbing his head and shouting to Mura.*

Murasame: Good question... I honestly don't remember. Just pick them all up and fix 'em. One of 'em's gotta be my apprentice.

*Later...*

Murasame: Lord Vaders... rise.

*All of the OGers rise chained to tables, but they now look exactly like they did before this story ever happened.*

Yami: Where's my cheesecake... is it alright?

Masamune: Where's the Swordefeller... is she alright?

GORE: Where's Donkey Congo... is he alright?

Vorpal: Where's Kuria... is she alright?

Kuria: Where's Vorpal... is he alright?

MJ: Where's Nader... did he win the election?

Marin: Where's Mary Kate... is she alright?

Mary Kate: (shakes violently and explodes)

Fred: Where's Masa... is he alright?

Luigi: Where's Ashley... is she alright?

Rebe: Where's Splog... he's the OG's title...

Murasame: I'm afraid he/she/it died/is gone. ...It seems in your anger, you've killed/eaten him/her/it.

*All the OGers snap their chains simulataneosuly.*

OGers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

THE END?

Starring In Order of Appearance
Marin
Roy
Vorpal
Kuria
Murasame
Masamune
Mario Jr.
Rebe
Fred
Luigi of the Pipes
GORE
Yami Yoshi
Golem

and featuring

Mysterious Silhouette
Caykface
Donkey Kongo
Germ
Sarugerm

Guest-starring....

Ashley
"Ezlo"
SteveT
Strawman
Liger
Kasei
Mary Kate
Caykilla
Plot Hole
Dodo
Slort
Aaronguy
Goombutler
Splog

And anyone who appeared after MJ's credits HA

Author: SOAP

~EPILOGUE~

(Meanwhile... Somewhere in the sky, a dot appears. The dot grows larger and larger, until it was clear that it was a goomba of some sort screaming out the top of his lungs.)

Goombutler: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(Goombutler crashlands in the street somewhere. Fortunately MJ"s head broke his fall.)

MJ: Owww! (grabs his throbbing head) That hurt!

Goombutler: Good job, old bean! A magnifiscent rescue if I do say so myself.

MJ: You again!

(MJ kicks Goombutler back to Kingdom Come.)

Marin: You do know that was Splog in disguise right?

MJ: GAWDDAMMIT!

Author: Luigi of the Pipes

~Everyone is back in the restaurant of Italianisms. Luigi sits in a booth on the other side of the room from the others, who are crammed into one booth. He glares at them and sips his Coke.~

Vorpal: The caykzors have been destroyed, but Murasame still lives. Again...

Yami: Not for long. According to this manual, one of the very few things that can kill Masamune and Murasame is... THE MASTER PIE!

~Yami holds up the Master Pie and mystic music plays.~

Masamune: Ye need to make it sparkle with the power to repel magic.

Yami: Oh...

~Murasame's face bursts through the wall next to them.~

Murasame: HEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY!

All: AAAAAUGH!

~The wall crumbles as Murasame slashes it away. They run to the opposite side of the building.~

Murasame: I shall end these pathetic stories once and for...

Luigi: No.

Murasame: WHAT?!

~Luigi stands up and faces Murasame.~

Luigi: Hello. My name is Luigi of the Pipes. You killed the good in me. Prepare to die.

~Murasame stares at Luigi a moment, and in that moment he realizes that he's trembling.~

Murasame: (That's not... it's... how can he do that?)

~Murasame turns and runs. Luigi chases after him. Murasame jumps on to a leaving boat and begins to sail away. Luigi stops on the shore.~

Luigi: YAAAAAMI!

Yami: What? I can't leave them!

Luigi: He's getting away from me Yami, PLEASE!

~Yami sighs and runs over to Luigi. Luigi jumps on Yami's back, who then Flutter Jumps on to the boat. Luigi jumps off of Yami and does a little bow, then turns and runs after Murasame, who's escaping into the ship. Murasame runs down a flight of stairs, turns, and throws his sword through Luigi's gut.~

Luigi: Ugh! ~collapses~ Sorry me... I tried... I tried...

***

Masamune: Well, I can't let him take all the credit for defeating MY arch nemesis...

Rebe: You're not going without me.

Masamune: Of course...

~Masamune grabs the Master Pie; he and Rebe jump on Dodo's back and fly over to the ship.~

***

Murasame: Well well... seems you grew up by yourself in a forest. You came all this way, just to die here. This is the saddest thing I've ever seen. How marvelous.

~Luigi pulls the sword out of his gut and tries to stand.~

Murasame: Good heavens. Are you still trying to win? ~picks up his sword~ Looks like you've got an overdeveloped sense of goodness. One that's going to get you into trouble some day.

~Murasame stabs at Luigi's heart, but Luigi blocks it.~

Luigi: ~stands~ Hello. My name is Luigi of the Pipes. You killed the good in me. Prepare to die.

~Luigi falls over. Murasame tries to attack again, but Luigi blocks.~

Luigi: Hello. My name is Luigi of the Pipes. You killed the good in me. Prepare to die.

~Strike block strike counterstrike. Murasame goes flying into a buffet.~

Luigi: Hello! My name is Luigi of the Pipes! You killed the good in me! Prepare to die!

Murasame: Stop saying that!

~Strike strike block strike~

Luigi: HELLO! MY NAME IS LUIGI OF THE PIPES! YOU KILLED THE GOOD IN ME! PREPARE TO DIE!

~Luigi scratches Murasame's cheek, who snarls.~

Luigi: Offer me money. ~scratches the other cheek~

Murasame: Of course.

Luigi: Power too.

Murasame: All that I have and more.

Luigi: Offer me everything I ever wanted.

Murasame: Anything... please!

~Murasame catches Luigi off guard by throwing a plate of cheesecake into his face.~

Luigi: I ~sob~ I want my goodness back, you son of a--

Murasame: Oh shut up...

~Murasame brings his sword down, but suddenly the ceiling explodes. Masamune dives in and smashes the Master Pie into Murasame's face.~

Murasame: Uh... heh... the pie... it is tasty... ~turns to stone, which promptly smashes through the deck of the ship, plunges into the ocean, and is gone. Forever.~

~Rebe rolls Luigi over.~

Rebe: Luigi! Hang on...

~Hospital, later...~

Doctor: I'm afraid I have bad news... ~shoots Masamune~

Masamune: I hate you.

Doctor: The patient is going to survive. You can see him.

Luigi: Hey...

Rebe: Hey.

Masamune: Yo.

Vorpal: Hi.

Kuria: Hello.

MJ: ~sniff~ I promised myself I wouldn't cry...

Luigi: Okay, I'm going to go to sleep in three minutes. Let's hurry along.

Rebe: We sprung to get you this.

~Masamune hands over a pie.~

Luigi: ~sniff~ Thanks.

Vorpal: So you're...?

Luigi: I'm done. When I'm evil, all I get is heavily wounded and perpetually nagged by him. ~points at MJ~ It's not worth it. I can't afford hospitalization, seriously.

Vorpal: That's good to hear. And by the miracle of OGs, you'll be all healed up in time for GMOG4.

Luigi: Oh yay. That's exactly what I want to do, gallyvant around with you-- ~falls asleep~

All: Oh Luigi...

~laugh track~

THE OTHER END!