Member OG 10 Page 6

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Author: GORE-ILLA

*In his dark surburban lab, FrESD leans over the unconcious GORE, working wildly on circuitry. The two heads talk to each other.*

Fred: What are we doing Doctor?

ESD: Oy, why did I have to become Professor Monkey-For-A-Body? If you must know, I am operating on GORE-ILLA. Installing a microchip to block put his current state of primal fury.

Fred: Please elaborate, sir. Your exposition is all that keeps me alive.

ESD: Fine, in fact, I'll tell you everything about GORE-ILLA and his true true past. I mean it now! No more time-travelling Jedis or any other crap! This is how he really came to be. It all started with the Velvet Monkey, a nearly-immortal simian. But he felt he would not be around forever, so he wanted an heir to carry on after him. That is why he enlisted me to help him, to make the ultimate fusion of organics and robot. Half of GORE-ILLA was made using the genetic material of the Velvet Monkey himself; the other half was mechanical parts constructed from I, the best work I ever did do. We soon discovered a problem, a flaw with the GORE-ILLA model. He seemed to be working fine, he was unnerved whenever he was near the Velvet Monkey.

Fred: (makes a break between the two paragraphs)

ESD: It must have been some strange side effect of the Velet Monkey's DNA in GORE that made him act this way when near the host. Once the Velvet Monkey even had a vision that constant exposure to the Velvet Monkey's presence would drive GORE into a homicidal rage. When GORE found out, he exiled himself from the Velvet Monkey's base, eventually coming to Earth and meeting the Party Goers. The Velvet Monkey actually never minded the possibility that GORE might kill him, thinking it would make GORE and even better successor.

Fred: How predictable. The name of the mountain was obviously "strange clone son of Velvet Monkey and EVIL Scientist Dude and heir to evil empire" spelled backwards.

*ESD opens his mouth to point out that nothing like that ever happened, when suddenly GORE's bionic eye flashed on, and his human eye slid open. He leapt up in full primal rage, Primate Punching FrESD into the opposite wall with enough force to split the two into Fred and a legless ESD. Quickly ESD found a remote control and pressed it. Slowly GORE calmed down.*

GORE: W-what? I... feel normal again.

ESD: Yes, sadly not for long. I wasn;t able to finish the microchip before you woke up. It was a once-in-a-lifetime thing. You'll become a mindless killer again within another hour- probably until you've killed the rest of the Second Generation.

GORE: ... I don't have much time.

*GORE-ILLA quickly leapt through the ceiling and rushed through the streets in an attempt to reach his destination. Soon he found a gloomy, foggy grove on Yoshi's Island, with a tombstone labelled "Yami Yoshi".*

GORE: I only have a few minutes left, so I'll have to make this quick. I knew I shouldn't have spent forty minutes looking up random horror movies and The Flintstones on Wikipedia. Anyway... it seems that we're cursed. You were the first to go, old buddy, but in a way I'm glad you're not alive to see this. This story might not end well, but I like to think that it will make the next happy ending even happier. (places a cheesecake on Yami's grave) Here you go- hope. For tomorrow.

*With that GORE clutched his head and screamed as he turned into his primal form again. He tore the tombstone in two and ran off into the night. But the cheesecake still remained.*