GCPA Sidequests Part 6

Anthologies of GCPA Sidequests

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10

The Adventures of Scruffy and Que Pasa: Harry Potter and the Mystery of Where the Hell the Light Rail is

by Scruffy and GORE-ILLA on November 18, 2005

*Big dramatic anime theme song filled with philospical lyrics that have nothing to do with the show.*

Scruffy: Excellent!

Que Pasa: Cap'n, everyone has gone off to Newport to watch the new Harry Potter movie!

Scruffy: What bout us? Weren't we invited?

Que Pasa: I dunno. The invitations must have gotten lost in the mail

Scruffy: Damn those fools! Who feeds them?

Que Pasa: Mr. T does.

*Scene of Mr. T sprinkling fish food into the ship from above.*

Scruffy: Who gives them shelter? Who adopted them???

Que Pasa: Kelsey Grammar. ...We must find them!

Scruffy.: Well then, who's ship is it?

Que Pasa: Technically it belongs to the state of Idaho.

Scruffy: ..... I have a brilliant idea that I just stole from you. Let's go find them!

Que Pasa: Excellent! They were going to take something they call the "light rail". We must find this "light rail" and intercept them there

Scruffy: What the fuck is that?

Que Pasa: I have no clue. But if we keep wandering in random directions, we're sure to find it.

Scruffy: Okay, before our ship gets blown up again though, let's use these horses that just happen to be here.

Que Pasa: Okay.

*Scruffy and Que Pasa board the horses and ride off while Lord of the Rings music plays*

(A horse bites Que Pasa's Mario-Kun manga)

Que Pasa: BAKANA! (eats the horses) Damn, I should have said it in Kanji to get extra credit

Scruffy: Great....now we have no mode of transportation! ...I have an excellent idea! (whistles)

(Salama comes tired and hungry saying, "Feed me feed me". Scruffy presses the button on the cloning machine and duplicates Salama into 3.)

Scruffy: There, transportation. And this time, the transportation can eat you instead of you eating it.

Que Pasa: Salama went to the movie didn't he?

Scruffy: No, I don't think he did. And anyway, this is a clone. All 3 are clones.

Que Pasa: *climbs out of Salama's mouth* Ah the cruel irony!

Scruffy: (pulls Que Pasa out) Stop...fooling ....around!!!

Que Pasa: Hey, you know this is the perfect opportunity for some random villain to come and challenge us!

Scruffy: So it is.

*A closet opens, and Mr. Fatigue marches out.*

Mr. Fatigue: Gimme yo' energy bitches!

Scruffy: Mr. Fatugue!!!!!

Mr. Fatigue: And that's Fatigure, bitch!!!

*Mr. Fatigue starts doing a wild dance*

Scruffy: Que Pasa....feel...weak!

Que Pasa: (cuts one of the Salama's stomaches open) Quick, hide in here!

Scruffy: Get the meat-scented Fabreese can....and spray it...on Fatigue!

Que Pasa: *does what he just said, and Mr. Fatigue runs off chased by the Salama clones.*

Scruffy: Good job, Que Pasa! Now, we're off.

Que Pasa: They're probably already at Newport Mall. Let's just head there

Scruffy: (following that sign that says Newport Mall)

*Mr. Meyer follows them in the shadows with two leashed cowjackals*

Que Pasa: We're almost there!

(Afyer a long and perilous trek through the Sahara Desert, Great Wall of China, center of the earth, and the Eiffel Tower, they reach the Light Rail.)

Scruffy: We're here...we made it!!!! (gets jumped)

*They're both pinned to the ground by Mr. Meyer's cowjackals.*

Scruffy: Damn it, so close! (train moves off to next stop) We missed it!

Que Pasa: Not yet! *tosses one of the cowjackals into the other, causing them to explode, then fires a grappling hook from his nose cannon that links onto the train*

*Scruffy grabs onto Que Pasa's foot as the train pulls him away*

Scruffy: Good job Que Pasa, I'll finish the cowjackls off! (drops energy sword on rail, causing an electric oversurge, send the jackals flying in a Team Rocket fashion)

Mr. Meyer: (speaks into walkie-talkie) They're getting away.

Guy on Other End: Don't worry, leave them to me.

*Gorenicus rides up in a hovercar and starts dropping junk towards Scruffy and Que Pasa.*

Scruffy: Aw crap, Gorenicus! Not you again, you stupid monkey!

*Gorenicus flies towards the grappling line with a giant pair of nose clippers*

Scruffy: No!!!!!

*Inside the train, the other crewmates are too busy tossing around Family Guy quotes to notice anything. Gorenicus cuts the line and sends them flying back as the train leaves*

Scruffy: (falls of) Remember me for who I am!!!!!

Que Pasa: Remember who?

Scruffy: (thud) ouch

Que Pasa: We failed to catch them there, but we have to get to Newport Mall! Our afternoon's entertainment is at stake! I just want to go there and shout out, "CEDRIC DIGGORY DIES!"

*The pirates quickly board jet skis and continue driving towards Newport.*

Scruffy: Where'd you get these?

Que Pasa: Don't remember. Think I stole them from a hobo.

Scruffy: I know what he feels like... (remembers a Jedi with a pirate band steal his blanket) Well, anyhow, how do you use 'em?

Que Pasa: You just... use them.

*Cap'n drives forward with new intensity. They soon arrive at Newport Mall after dodging a field of movies starring rappers like Fifty Cent*

Scruffy: Phew, we made it!

*Scruff and Pas quickly rush towards the movie theater.*

Movie Dude: Sorry, the movie already started, and it's never being shown again since its being recalled for its high amount of HOT SEX

Que Pasa: Maybe we can sneak in!

*Gorenicus drops down through the air duct*

Gorenicus: Not so fast!

Scruffy: Not you again! (throws fireball)

*Gorenicus is still laughing, chokes on the fireball and explodes*

Scruffy: ....I planned that. Now, let's go in!

Movie Guy: I said no!!!!

Scruffy: Que Pasa, dance off with him!

Que Pasa: *grabs a pencil and duels the Movie Dude; Eventually the Movie Dude is pinned to the poster for Superman Returns by a pencil going through his chest*

*The others come out of the movie.*

Que Pasa: Wow, that duel lasted 154 minutes?

Scruffy: Wrong!!!, it lasted 154.00 minutes!!! u fail, no go to the dorner and cry!!!

Que Pasa: Fine. Where's the dorner?

*A giant polygonal being drops down.*

Being: I AM THE DORNER, BRINGER OF DOOM!

Scruffy: Oh no, trouble! (goes into a trash can and a magical light appears around it, a figure pops out wearing a cape and speaking with a Californian accent)

Figure: Where there's trouble, you can count on Super Hobo!!!!!!

*Super Hobo and the Dorner run into each other and fight until Dorner's penis is set on fire and he explodes.*

Super Hobo: Whenever a citizen is in need , like I'll be there, or here, or that place where the citizen is.......Super Hobo...AWAY!!!!!!(goes to fly off for a dramatic end but trips over own cape)

Super Hobo: Dude!!! That, like, hurt shaw!

*The Millenium Falcon drives into the mall.*

Han Solo: Great shot, kid! That was one in a million!

Que Pasa: What the hell just happened?

*Japanese anime credits play with shots of random girls and more lyrics with philosophical meaning that have nothing to do with the show.*

The Electric Train Adventures

by No Name on November 19, 2005

The Adventures of Scruffy and Que Pasa- Outbreak: The Unofficial Steven Spielberg Sequel That Japan Never Released in America

by Scruffy and GORE-ILLA on November 23, 2005

Untitled

by No Name on November 23, 2005

Thanksgiving

Written November 26, 2005

Anthologies of GCPA Sidequests

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10