Gamehiker Member OG 2 Page 5

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Author: Masamune

~With their journeys over, the OGers return to Antonio's Pizza Parlor and Assorted Other Italian Foods, everybody ignores them~

Yami: Nobody seems to care.

Fred: Yeah...

~Golem sits at the table with tray full of drinks~

Vorpal: Hey, aren't you underage?

Golem: It's just... juice.

~They all hold their mugs up and tip them together, then drink~

GORE: This all seems vaguely melodramatic.

Masamune: Aye... *suddenly looks up to see a woman at another table* Hmmm. *takes another drink and gets up*

MJ: Hey, isn't that Rebe?

Marin: Yeah...

Fred: But... I thought...

Lupus: You'll always have me, pal.

Fred: Joy.

Masamune: *walks up to her and tips hat* Arr, miss.

Rebe: Excuse me?

Masamune: Arr.

Rebe: Oh....

Masamune: I just saved the planet, wanna head off somewhere?

Rebe: Actually, I was talking to this guy here...

Masamune: *looks at the plain faced fellow there* This guy boreing you? I got a ship, it flies. Wink

Rebe: Well, we were thinking of leaving...

Guy: .....

Rebe: But then again, maybe not. Let's go.

~They both leave together~

Guy: *mockingly* 'I've got a ship', bah.

~Sometime later~

Fred: *is suddenly struck by an arrow in the head* I'm dying!

Vorpal: Relax. *pulls it off* It's just a suction cup. There's a note on it.

Fred: Oh. *reads it* "My dear Fred," It's for me.

GORE: Get on with it!

Fred: Right. "My dear Fred, you cannot always be torn in two. You will have to be one and whole for many OGs. Your part in this story will go on."

Golem: Who is it from?

Fred: Er, Masamune.

Golem: From where?

Fred: The Hangar- he's leaving!

Vorpal: Oh.

Fred: I have to stop him! Besides, you guys are boring.

~He arrives at last at the Hangar, now fully redone to suit Masamune's tastes. In the center of it all is a great giant sailing ship, like the ones in the other OGs. But this one is new, obviously.~

Fred: Mr. Mune! Wait!

Masamune: *turns around* You weren't supposed to follow me!

Fred: I made a promise, a promise.

Masamune: And you kept it?

Fred: No.

Masamune: Listen, we saved the Earth. Especially for me. And I'm going to enjoy it.

Fred: No. You don't mean that.

Masamune: I do. You can't help me anymore Fred. Go home.

Fred: No! I'm coming with you!

Masamune: But you can't sail!

Fred: *climbs aboard ship anyways*

Masamune: Arr, fine.

~He climbs on board the S.S. Swordefeller...~

Masamune: I thought you were supposed to stick to the rules!

Fred: We figured the rules were more like guidelines.

Masamune: Do it again and you'll walk the plank.

Rebe: *hands him his hat* The ship is yours.

Masamune: Arr... *puts hand on the helm* Ah... *looks around* To your posts ye mangy swabs! *after they all rush away he relaxes* Now... bring me that horizon.... drink up me harties, yo ho!

THE END

Starring In Order of Appearance
Yami Yoshi
Vorpal
Golem
Rhyk
Masamune
GORE-ILLA
Kuria
Lady in Red
Lupus
Aaron
Plot Hole
Luigi of the Pipes
Hungary
Uruguay
Antonio
Mario Jr.
Carrotcake King
Murasame
Marin
Yoshiman

and featuring

Vorpasame

Guest-starring....

Ditto McCloaker
Slort the Goomba
Dodo the Raven
Mecha-Amish
Caykzor
The Canned-Laughter Turkey
Chibi-Devil
Luigi Jr.
... and bah, others I can't be bothered to look up!

Author: GORE-ILLA

~Epilogue, even though Masa beat me to this first joke...*

• Murasame runs up to a boat on his way to the fortress of his master, the Mysterious Silhouette, AKA Lord Confusingous. Suddenly Luigi rushes after the boat.*

Luigi: Wait Mr. Same!

Murasame: Luigi, stop! I'm going alone!

Luigi: Yes, and I'm going with you!

• Luigi uses the Force to enhance his leap towards Murasame's ship, but he winds up leaping right past it and into the ocean.*

Luigi: Help! I've somehow forgotten how to swim!

Murasame: Luigi!

• Murasame pulls Luigi onto the boat.*

Luigi: I made a promise, Mr. Same. A promise. Uruguay said, "Don't you leave him, Luigi of the Pipes! Don't you leave him!" And I don't mean to. I don't mean to.

Murasame: Alright, but remember that to my master I'm known as Lord Meanie.

• Back at the pizza parlor...*

Yami: I have to admit- without my cheesecake, it would not have been victory.

Vorpal: Victory? Victory, you say? No, Master Yami Yoshi. Not victory. Begun this Clone War has.

Lupus: What Clone War?

Vorpal: Shut up.

Kuria: Where'd Golem get to?

Vorpal: He's escorting the Lady in Red back home.

• In Turquiose*

Priest: I know pronounce you man and wife.

• Golem reaches towards Sapphire, having revealed her identity to Golem melodramatifcally, with his mechanical hand.*

Sapphire: ...Other hand.

• Golem and Sapphire kiss passionately as that romancey theme plays in the background.*

Golem: ...Teehee.

• Elsewhere, Murasame and Luigi stand on a cliff overlooking Lord Confusingous's fortress.*

Murasame: I hope the others find a more horrible death.

Luigi: The Carrotcake and the Plot Hole'll look after them.

Murasame: I don't suppose we'll ever fight them again.

Luigi: We may yet, Mr. Same. We may.

Murasame: Luigi... (shoves off cliff and runs off)

• A familiar theme plays in the background as the credits start rolling for good, blocking out Luigi's scream. To be continued in Gamehiker Member OG III (shots of some volcanic eruptions).*

Author: Luigi of the Pipes

~Next time, on Gamehiker Member OG 3~

~Kuria sits in a room on the Omnipotent. Krunk and Snipes enter.~

Snipes: Cap'n sssaysss you'll be dining with him tonight. And you'll be wearing thisss. ~holds up a clotheshanger~

Kuria: But... there's nothing on that.

Snipes: Exactly.

Kuria: Tell him that I am respectfully disinclined to acquiesce to his request.

Krunk: CAP'N SAID YOU SAY THAT! YOU DINE WITH CREW NAKED!

Kuria: But... I'll be naked either way.

Krunk: YEAH.

Kuria: I think I'll just order Chinese.

Krunk/Snipes: ~glare~ Fine.

Author: SOAP

Marin: Well. That was fun.

MJ: Hey, maybe next time, Mama and Papa will join in!

Marin: Uh... I don't think our parents are going want to be anywhere near me after that stunt I pulled in the movie theatre.

~flashback two weeks earlier~

• Marin and Peach are sitting watching a movie together. Suddenly something scary happens on screen and Peach grabs Marin by the leg. Marin responds by taking her hand and giving her a reassuring squeese. Peach looks at her and smiles. Marin smiles back starts kissing on her neck. Peach doesn't say anything. Marin starts nibbling on her ear. Peach still doesn't say anything. After a while Peach pushes her off and gets up.*

Peach: What the hell are you doing?

Marin: Mom... I.

• Peach storms out of the theatre totally red with embarasment. Marin chases after and grabs her by the hand.*

Marin: Mom! Gawd! I'm so sorry. I totally misread your signals... Do you think we could just go back to be mom and daughter again?

Peach: Just stay the hell away with me. *leaves*

~end flashback~

Marin: Let's get the hell out of here.

MJ: 0.o Okey-dokey, sis.