Galaxy Goers Page 3

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Author: GORE-ILLA

A small cruiser soars through the infinite blackness that is space at breakneck speeds that are sure to be above the speed limit. The ship's pilot is a most odd-looking fellow, from his hair to his toes- even though he was just a teenage human. One of his most bizarre characteristics was his hair, a wild mangly mane of hair that shot out from his head in every direction except down. Each hair seemed to have a life of its own.

The boy's eyes were unseen, hidden behind a thick set of goggles. Even if you couldn't see his eyes, you could tell that he was most definately happy from that sinister grin which always seemed to be across his face. But it was not wise to cross this teenager- especially if you comment on his abnormally low height. This dude can get surprisingly angry.

Now for the teenager's attire. He wore his open lab coat loosely and in a way that made even the dorky piece of fashion look cool. Beneath that he wore a Star Wars shirt. Whatever the shirt displayed changed with his mood. Since he was currently happy, the shirt depicted the Endor celebration.

One reason for the teen's happiness may have been the music blaring from his radio and loud enough to be heard from space no matter how impossible it is. The boy hummed along to the song, "Oh I'm too sexy for my Lithium 89 Quad-Laser Cannon, Too sexy for my Lithium 89 Quad-Laser Cannon, so sexy it hurts! And I'm too sexy for Coruscant, too sexy for Coruscant, Tatooine and Bespin!"

Suddenly the boy's song was interuppted by a red blinking light on his console. The t-shirt flashed an image of Jar Jar Binks as the irritated boy turned off his music.

"A distress signal? Dammit, whenever I try to listen to my songs!"

He pressed the button, and a female voice (Rhykette) was heard. However there was static. "Help-- Under attack-- Pies n' Cakes-- Bask--" It cut off.

"Ho ho! A woman!" The t-shirt changed to show Princess Leia garbed in a metal bikini. "Maybe this won't be as pointless as I thought." He aimed his ship towards their coordinates. "Wait up, they mentioned a Bask! I'll have to suit up." The boy scrambled over to grab a special helmet which was abnormally large to fit around his hair. He wore it. "Let's see how you do without your telekenisis against the greatest human mind in the universe! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!11"

The teenager's ship drew near to the battle and, using some brilliant techniques that are too complicated for non-rocket scientists to comprehend, manages to chase off the Bladechappe and then docks with the Pies 'N Cakes.

"Greetings crew of the Pies 'N Cakes! I come bearing an olive branch of peace, because I hate olives! Any questions?"

Luigi had one. "Yeah. Who the hell are you?"

"My true name is of no importance. You may call me..." the camera zoomed in dramatically on his goggles. "Triple-X!"

A stunned silence followed, and one of the crew members coughed.

Finally GM broke the silence. "So Mister X, do you happen to have any expensive bounties on you?"

Luigi slapped him. "We're not captured someone who just saved our lives!"

"By the way, we're the young lady who sent that distress signal?" asked the Triple-X.

"That was me," said Rhykette.

"Oh.. so... you're a robot."

Rhykette nodded. "Whatever. So what are you guys doing?"

"Looking for bounties and money and boots or something. Want in?"

Triple-X shrugged, "Sure, I could use the money for my experiments. I'll follow you guys from my ship."

"So, like, what are you, a scientist or something?"

"Yep, I'm the first freelance scientist. No one even knows about my career. If the government found out I'd be stuck in one of their boring facilities being forced to work on their defense programs instead of stuff I want to do. In retrospect I shouldn't have told you any of this. Especially since I've lost my Amnesia and Death Rays. By the way, we should start moving now before that Bask comes back."

"But I thought you dealt with him?"

"Only temporarily. Knowing The Bask won't give up so easily. Let's get out of here while we still can."

Author: GM

(Earlier at Milliways, which I'm getting sick of, the Itoli were taking a closer look at "Tiffa". She was wearing completely different clothing than when they last saw her and, when she woke up, kept yelling over and over again that she was the Neko-Neko Emperess.)

Kolan: Maybe she has multiple personalities.

Datana: Tiffa's never had multiple personalities.

Kolan: She could've developed some since your school days.

Nefertina: I am not this "Tiffa" person! I'm the Emperess of the Neko-Neko Empire and if you don't let me go now, not only will all three of you be executed, but your planet will pay dearly!

Kolan: Alright, alright, go! Just stop being such a-

Datana: *interupting* We're very sorry for the inconvinience, your Highness. We thought you were someone else.

Loter: *nods*

(Nefertina just stomped away from them and yelled out for her guards.)

Datana: You had to knock her out, didn't you? Now we'll probably be fired.

Kolan: Fired? Didn't she just threaten to kill us?

Datana: That makes it worse for you, you dumbass! Anyway, we'd better look for the real Tiffa.

Kolan: Do we have to? I'm full, tired, and I just want to go home now.

Datana: We're not leaving without her, Kolan! Got that?

Kolan: Loter, help me out here!

Loter: ...

Kolan: Well, some help you are.

Datana: Okay, let's split up and look for her. We'll meet back here in ten minutes.

(Her brothers shrugged and they split up. They looked everywhere, which was easy since Milliways had such lousy security. They met up again at their ship ten minutes later.)

Datana: You guys didn't find her anywhere?

Kolan: She's not with us, is she?

Loter: ...

Datana: Just great. Where could she-

Nefertina: You three again!

Kolan: Oh no...

(Nefertina had spotted them at the hanger entrance and was now stomping toward them.)

Nerfertina: Where are my guards!?

Datana: We don't know about your guards, your Highness.

Nefertina: I doubt that! My guards and ship have disappeared! This combined with what you three did to me... Is this some kind of kidnapping plot!?

Datana: Of course no-

Nefertina: I'll have you know that if you do anything to me, the Neko-Neko Empire will make sure you pay dearly!

Datana: Your Highness, this was all just a big misunderstanding. We thought you were a friend of mine who was with us earlier. You bear a strong resemblence to her.

Kolan: *mumbling* And to think that an hour or so ago I was wondering if I could score with this bitch.

Nefertina: What was that!?

Kolan: Um, hey I just thought of something! You know how we thought you were Datana's friend, right? Well, maybe your guards thought our friend was you and left with her!

Nefertina: ...That is the most idiotic thing I've ever heard.

Datana: It's a possibility...

Nefertina: My guards would never be so stupid! They know what I look like!

Datana: Yes, but Tiffa looks exactly like you, your Highness. It's a very likely possibilty at this point.

Kolan: A lame and slightly overused posibility, but yeah.

Nefertina: ...Son of a bitch! Stupid guards! When I find them they're all going to be executed!

Datana: This can't be good for Tiffa... We've gotta go after them!

Kolan: What!?

Datana: She could be in mortal danger right now!
__________

(Keeping an old cliche alive, Tiffa wasn't currently in danger. In fact, she was lying on her throne while Jorge and Andromeda fanned her with giant leaves.)

Jorge: I hate being a slave.

Tiffa: Well, it's the only think I can think of to keep you from getting executed.

Jorge: I know, but if I have to do this, can I-

Tiffa: If you say anything perverted, I'm going to sue you for sexual harassment too.

Jorge: ...Damn!

(Suddenly, a guard bursts in and bows.)

Guard: Forgive me, my Emperess, but the Bladechappe is on our radar! You're needed at the bridge.

Tiffa: It is!? I mean, *ahem*, I understand. Servants, wait here for my return. Your Emperess commands it!

(With that, Tiffa got up and followed the guard out of the room.)
__________

Nefertina: Do you really think my guards would let you three on my ship?

Datana: No... But if you come with us, we can switch you and Tiffa. If that's okay with you, Your Highness.

Nefertina: What!? Me!? Travel with you three!? Never! I'll just wait here and wait for my ships to pick me up. They'll have to figure out it's not me eventually.

Kolan: It could be a long wait.

Datana: Your Highness, we are trained Itoli bodyguards. You'd be safe with us.

(Datana shows the Emperess her identification.)

Nefertina: Hmm... Alright. I don't want to wait to make my guards pay anyway, and I'm sure you know better than to cross the me.

Datana: Yes, your Highness. Shall we go?

Nefertina: I hope you don't mean in that civilian ship. That thing would never be able to keep up with my personal ship. However, I did spot a bunch of dead Galactic Policemen in th resturant. Perhaps there's a cruiser somewhere.

Kolan: Wait a minute! You want us to steal a Galactic Police cruiser!? Do you know how much trouble well be in!?

Nefertina: I'll tell them that I needed it. I doubt they'll question me. The Galactic Police is weak. Why do you think they depend so much on bounty hunters?

Kolan: Because the galaxy is big and hard to police.

Nefertina: You! You're not aloud to talk anymore!

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

Computer: Once again separated, the Pie N' Cakes makes communication with Triple-X's ship.

Rhykette: We're slaving your ship to ours for the time being. Our financial benefactor is rather eager to finish his original mission after these delays, so we're going straight to AlphaTwoSectorJ5ElevenPiCueball9er. Do you need supplies?

Triple-X: I'm good.

Rhykette: Okay. We're launching in three... two... one.

Computer: The ships jump into hyperspace. GM turns to Luigi, now in the captain's chair.

GM: Can't we go after Don Miguel first?

Luigi: He'll be quite safe with SteveT.

GM: You're just saying that.

Luigi: Yes. At least you'll get to keep your full profit.

GM: . . .

***

Masamune: Chase off my ship, will they?

Ashley: Well, they sent a distress signal and you attacked them.

Masamune: They stole a ship! And we have to destroy them anyway!

Dark Ditto: ~coughs~

Masamune: What did you say, punk?

Dark Ditto: I said ~coughs~.

Masamune: Don't think I can pull this off, eh? Maybe you'd like to see the inside of my rocket booster up close?

Dark Ditto: ~looks at Ashley~ Aren't you going to chastise him for violence and stuff?

Ashley: You killed my dad.

Dark Ditto: Yes, well... Your friend wouldn't be too happy, would he? Good ol' Darth?

Masamune: . . . whatever. What do you suggest we do then?

Dark Ditto: Naturally. I know exactly what we should do... Set coordinates for the Plural Z Alpha system.

Masamune: But that's...

Dark Ditto: Yes. Now do it.

Author: Masamune

Depkon: Curses, what did you do!? Where are we?

Masamune: I don't know! *hits controls* One second we were heading to the Plural Z Alpha system and then we're here.

Depkon: Um. Yeah, I got that part.

Masamune: I was explaining it for the sake of these two.

~Ashley and Dark Ditto look at the ground~

Lt. Chozo: Our star charts indicate we're near Neko-Nekoian Empire.

Depkon: Distance?

Lt. Chozo: Five hundred light years it seems.

Masamune: This is Ditto's fault, Plural Z system my arse.

Depkon: That was incredibly fast. Unusually fast.

Masamune: Well no use discussing it, activate the-

Lt. Chozo: The Temporal Drive has been disabled. Permanently.

Masamune: How?

Depkon: *indicates a control panel* The computer indicates a small object composed of lead struck the temporal drive at high velocity.

Zebesian: Captain! We're detecting a Neko-Neko ship.

Masamune: Damn! Of all the persistent...

Zebesian: It's the Empress's Ship.

Lt. Chozo: They're sending a transmission.

Masamune: Blah blah, surrender, blah blah. Put it on, this should be good.

~the screens turns into the face of Tiffa~

Tiffa: Um. Hi.

Masamune: Can I help you?

Tiffa: Ah yes. It seems that, I mean. You have to surrender, if you could. Please?

Masamune: *looks baffled* I'd rather not.

Tiffa: I don't want to fire on your vessel.

Masamune: Sounds fun. *closes transmission and the viewscreen vanishes*

Lt. Chozo: Orders?

Masamune: Get us out of here.

Lt. Chozo: The Temporal Drive is integrated with the Hyperspace Engine. We-

Masamune: Won't be able to take off. So we'll need a new Temporal Drive or Hyperspace Engine.

Depkon: *smiles and points to the ship on the screen* I bet they have one.

Masamune: I do believe you're right.

Ashley: Is that such a good idea? She didn't seem that bad to me.

Lt. Cho: The Neko-Neko Empress is ruthless. She may have acted odd, but deception is often one of her tools.

Masamune: A direct assault could risk destroying their engines. We'll take the ship. Lt. Cho, you're in command of the vessel. I'll lead a team to take over the Empress's Ship.

Dark Ditto: I may as well go, I feel rather pointless right now.

Ashley: I guess I'll go...

Masamune: Good. *randomly points at Zebesians* You're coming too.

___________________

Neko-Neko Captain: Shall we fire?

Tiffa: Maybe he'll change his mind.

Neko-Neko Captain: It's not our custom to wait on criminals...

~the video screen comes up on front of them, Masamune is on it~

Masamune: I changed my mind. I wish to transport aboard to discuss the terms of surrender.

Tiffa: *turns to captain* See? *turns back to Masamune* Request granted. Standby.

Author: Mario Jr.

(The Neko General eyes Tiffany suspiciously...)

Neko General: You look different somehow... I can't quite put my claw on it...

Tiffa: ^^" I had my hair done recently. You like it?

(Tiffa tosses her head side to side, shimmering red hair slicing the air in long locks. The Neko General opened his mouth to say something but one of the Neko Guards steps in.)

Neko Guard: Your Imperialness! The criminal has been teleported aboard.

Tiffa: Good! Bring him in.

(The Neko steps aside to allow Masumune to enter the room, who was followed closely by Ashley.)

Masamune: Your Highness if I may have a word--

Tiffa: Silence! You will not speak unless I grant you permission. Is that understood?

(Masamune reluctantly knods. Tiffa smiles and walks up past Masamune, slipping something her pocket. )

Tiffa: *to Masa* I can't talk now. I'm not who you think I am. I'll meet you in the brig later.

Masamune: o_O

Tiffa: Take them to the brig with the other to prisoners.

Neko Guard: As you wish, Your Highness.

~Elewhere~

(Jorge is back in the brig with Andi.)

Jorge: I'm bored! I wish I was back with Tiffa.

Andi: Only boring people get bored, Jorge.

Jorge: Hey! What's that supposed to mean!?

Neko Guard: You there!

Jorge: Shutting up.

Neko Guard: I had it with the both of you. Filthy human scum...

Andi: Actually I'm an android. Don't equate me with this carbon-based lower lifeform over there.

Neko Guard: I don't care what you are! I don't like being talked back to. I'm going to come in there and take it out of your arse!

Jorge: That's brutality! The Queen doesn't want us hurt till we get to Solara.

Neko Guard: Heh, heh! What the Queenie don't know won't hurt her.

Andi: Oh fine. If I must... *starts unbuttoning her shirt*

Neko Guard: No. Not you. *knods at Jorge* I want that Latino one over there.

Jorge: I'm a guy!

Neko Guard: Yeah. So?

(The Neko chuckles to himself as he opens the gate and locks it behind him.)

Neko Guard: Come here you!

Jorge: Hey now! I don't swing that way! This ain't right!

Andi: Yeah right, Jorge. You know you like that stuff.

Jorge: *hyperventilates* This isn't happening! Stay away from me you perv!

Neko Guard: Aw, it'll only take a second.

(While the Neko male makes a grab at Jorge, Andi comes up from behid, grabs his gun off his belt, and shoots him him point blank before the Neko knew what was going on. The Neko hits the ground dead.)

Jorge: Andi! You saved me!

Andi: Oh please. I just wanted to keep things G-rated around here. Grab his keys and let's go. I have a feeling something bad is about to happen.

Jorge: Okay.

(Jorge makes a grab at keys off the floor but ends up kicking them outside the cell.)

Jorge: *sweatdrop*

Andi: Way to go Jorge.

Author: Masamune

Masamune: They took us to the brig. I thought we were going to discuss peace.

Zebesian 1: *shrugs*

Zebesian 2: At least they didnt' execute us.

Masamune: These aren't BASKS.

Ashley: How do we get out and take over the ship?

Masamune: You might notice that Dark Ditto is not among us.

Ashley: Oh yeah.

Neko-Neko Guard: I could just leave you in there.

Masamune: You'd hate working here. They're all angsty and lick theirselves.

~the guard shifts into Dark Ditto~

Dark Ditto: This is true, but the Darth said I'd get revenge on you. Not rescue you.

Jorge: Hey Andi, those people got out.

Andi: We can get out. I have a gun in my hand...

Jorge: Let us out! Please!

Ashley: They look harmless.

Masamune: Fine. Khaashar, free them.

~one of the Zebesians, Khaashar, opens the door~

Masamune: Okay. Let's make this quick. You zebesians will secure the area. Ashley, Ditto and I will head to the engine room and-

~the door suddenly opens as Tiffa walks in*

Tiffa: I'm going to free- what?

Masamune: A hostage. Ditto, grab her.

Ditto: Me!? I'm no lackey.

Masamune: *groans* Fine, I'll do it.

Tiffa: Hey! Stop! *is grabbed by Masamune*

Jorge: Um, maybe we should stop them.

Andi: *shrugs*

Jorge: Who are you?

Masamune: Masamune.

Jorge: The pirate? Awesome.

Andi: Men.

Masamune: Okay, let's go.

~The Zebesians open their claws, which have lasers inside them. They march down the hallways shooting down Neko Guards. Masamune and Ashley arm theirselves with guns gathered from the ensuing battle. Tiffa is now gagged and handcuffed over Masamune's shoulder. Some more fighting later they're in the engine room~

Ashley: How do we get it back on the Bladechappe?

Masamune: *pulls out comlink* Cho?

Lt. Cho: ~over comlink~ Captain.

Masamune: Prepare for transport of the engine. *turns to Zebesians* Hack into the computers and get the transporters online. Dark Ditto, you'll need to morph into one of those Nekos to authorize.

~they do so~

Masamune: Okay Cho. Transport.

~the engine vanishes~

Ashley: Now what?

Masamune: The Nekos will have the transporters locked down. We'll need to make it to the hangar. Everyone out.

Jorge: This is kind of fun.

~in the hangar, after much fighting~

Masamune: Okay, everyone divide. Take as many space pods as possible. *picks up comlink* Lieutenant, disable the enemy's weapons by any means neccessary.

~the ships all leave the hangar, as the ships go towards the Bladechappe, it fires on the Neko-Neko ships weapon systems. One blast gets out and hits one of the ships. Having been hacked from the inside, the shields were down and unable to defend. Soon Masamune is back on the bridge~

Depkon: Well done. Let's finish them.

Masamune: No need, they're too crippled to follow.

Depkon: Idiot! Destroy them!

Masamune: Not on my ship, Depkon. *turns to Cho* Lieutenant, use the Snagret Maneuver. We need to hide to get repairs finished.

Lt. Cho: Aye aye.

Masamune: Khaashar, report.

Khaashar: Five were wounded in battle, three dead. The prisoners have been escorted to their rooms, as you requested.

Masamune: The damaged ship?

Khaashar: Ah... Ukhazhar was killed. As for Dark Ditto...

Masamune: He's dead?

Lt. Cho: He probably wishes he was.

Masamune: Damn, the Darth will kill me if he dies.

Ashley: I thought you couldn't die.

Masamune: He'll make me wish I could.

~In the Medical Bay~

Ashley: What's his condition?

Medical-Bot: Severe. He will not survive.

Masamune: Is there anything you can do?

Medical-Bot: Completely rebuild him into a new mechanical shell.

Masamune: And that will save him?

Medical-Bot: It is not certain, but it is the only option with over a 25% chance of survival.

Masamune: Do it.

Author: Vorpal

OoC: To please (or aggrivate) everyone, I will be switching writing styles as it suits me.

~Year 2060, Plural Z Alpha, Earth~

Vorpal sits in a peaceful clearing, surrounded by trees. This is, however, a much older Vorpal, with white hair, a full beard, and a few wrinkles, but still looks remarkable for his age. Before him, on the ground is the Vorpal Sword, the source of his power, his blessing and curse. In this, his last moment of meditation, places his memories into the sword, supressing the demon within the sword far away.

A few moments later, Earth is no more, and a single solitary sword begins it's long journey, hurtling through space, toward AlphaTwoSectorJ5ElevenPiCueball9er.

~Year 2345, AlphaTwoSectorJ5ElevenPiCueball9er, Syntax~

The planet Syntax of AlphaTwoSectorJ5ElevenPiCueball9er revolved only a few million miles from the solitary sun of the sector. It was, for the most part, a volcanic planet, and this is where the Pie N' Cakes, along with Triple-X's ship, broke off from hyperspace and entered orbit.

Luigi: Well... Let's get started.

Rhykette: *eyeing the planet* I estimate there to be approximately 3,456,927 volcanos on this planet. How can we be certain that the boot will be in our first encounter?

Luigi: We can't. That's why we need to get started.

The crew dons heat resistant suits, leaving Luigi's lugs to keep the ship in orbit. They are beamed down at the foot of a particularly menacing volcano, currently issuing millions of gallons of molten lava.

Luigi: Now, I'm the professional here, so just follow me and I promise: No one will get hurt.

Triple-X: Ow! I stubbed my toe!

GM: You said no one would get hurt!! You promised!

Luigi: ~sigh~ Just come on.

The group trudges up the volcano, until they enter into a cavern that leads into the inside of the volcano. There, sitting precariously on a narrow ledge, directly above a pool of lava, is a boot.

Luigi: What'd I tell, ya? I rock so much.

Luigi recovers the boot after a few suspenseful minutes of creeping across the ledge, almost slipping, and then missing the boot on the first attempt and knocking it further off the ledge, almost allowing it to fall into the lava, but grabbing it on the second attempt, and returning without any problem at all.

GM: It's as if I'm watching a movie.

Rhykette: This seems much too easy for being like, worth five million space yen. You would have thought we would have met more resistence--

GM: Would you shut up!? You don't want to jinx it!

But it was too late. A figure appears at the entrance of the opening they entered in through. A horrifying creature (by human standards) that stood nearly seven feet tall, it had hairless orange skin, and face that looked as iff skin was stretched over a horse's skull. It had a tatoo scrawled across it's face and large black, pupilless eyes. Other than the face, and skin, it had the build of a large muscular human. A cape billowed behind it as it approached. In it's hand, it held what appeared to be an ancient Earth Japanese katana.

Creature: Who are you? And what are you doing on my planet?

Depiste it's grotesque mouth, it spoke perfect English. After a few moments in frozen utter horror, someone nudged Luigi.

Luigi: Well... you see... uh, Mr. . . .

Creature: Delta. Delta Error is what they call me.

Luigi: ... Mr. Delta, I was hired to retrieve this boot, for five million space yen, and...

Delta: I see. Well, then go ahead and take it. What do I care about a boot? For a moment, everyone thought they hadn't heard correctly.

Triple-X: Excuse me?

Delta: I thought you may have been bounty hunters, or worse yet, volcano divers. We've been having problems with those types recently.

GM: Heh... we're definitely not one of those.

Luigi: Well... we need to be going.

Delta: Not so fast!

Luigi: *gulp* uhm... what seems to be the problem?

Delta: You cannot leave until... we send you off in the Farewell Feast. It is tradition on this planet. Come, I will show you to my people. They will be well pleased to have friendly aliens here for a change.

Triple-X: Couldn't we just forego the entire... Farewell Feast?

Delta: That would be a grave insult to our customs, and would be punishable by death.

Triple-X: Sorry I asked.

Luigi: I guess we'll go to the Farewell Feast, then.

Delta: Splendid!

Delta Error leads the Galaxy Goers down the volcano and down into a deep underground cavern, which after a few miles, opened up into a very large complex of rooms that had an entire city built into it.

Delta: I became the leader of the Syntaxians about twenty years ago. Before then, I was a simple surface-ore miner until one day I came upon this sword. It not only gave me incredible strength and stature among my people, but it gave me great intelligence, and the Syntaxians made me their leader.

As the Galaxy Goers walked into the city, they could see why the Syntaxians reverred Delta so. For he stood head and shoulders above the rest, and his horse-snout was unique to his species. The other Syntaxians had more human like faces, except for the lack of ears and noses and the same dark eyes.

But as they walked down the street, some female syntaxians swooned as Delta walked by. Apparently his face was very attractive to the people here.

Delta led the Galaxy Goers to what appeared to be a public square, and stood up on a crate. A great deal of Syntaxians gathered around, curious about the alien visitors.

Delta: My friends, countrymen, we have the great privilege to give these aliens the Farewell Feast!

To this proclamation came great yells from the throng. A particularly attractive Syntaxian, in the excitement ran out and kissed GM.

GM: I... could get used to this...

Author: Yoshiman

Meanwhile, some hundreds of thousands of kilometers above the surface of Syntax.

Gravve owned a small one-man ship with the words 'Supernova Fire Trap' on the side, even though the ship's internal name was just 'Supernova'. IT was curently passing through AlphaTwoSectorJ5ElevenPiCueball9er on it's way back to the Stupard system, near the center of the galaxy. Gravve was Eotian, somewhat lizard-looking but completely covered in fur instead of scales. He had been holding a small black box for the past three days after he left the planet Fourus 4.

Gravve: PREDIC, give me our ETA.

PREDIC: Four weeks, three days and seven hours.

Gravve: I'm still bored. Entertain me.

PREDIC: You have completed all your stored entertainment videos, sir.

Gravve: Music?

PREDIC: There is no broadcasting station within three sectors.

Gravve: Well give me some thing.

PREDIC: If you would like to speed up the mission, I would like to inform you that a Bask ship and a cruiser of unknown origin are currently orbiting the planet Syntax. Neither one is heavily guarded.

Gravve: YES! That's perfect. Which one's faster?

PREDIC: The Bask ship, but--

Gravve: They're psychic, right?

PREDIC: The ship is not piloted by Basks, but--

Gravve: Perfect! Set course!

The Supernova fell into orbit with the Bask ship.

Gravve: Override protocol, open up landing bay doors.

PREDIC: Doors open.

The Supernova carefully wedged its way into a docking bay that was slightly to small for the ship, scraping across the sides.

Gravve: Couldn't you have found a better docking bay!

Gravve stowed the small black box into the back of his ship and opened up the hatch.

Gravve: PREDIC, Override main computer sequencing. We got ourselves a new toy.

Meanwhile:

Slorg: ~guuuhtherereintrudersonnnnnurghaboard~

Splot: ~durrrghhowcanyoutellurgh?~

Slorg pointed to a blinky light.

Splot: ~Garrrghpresstheuhrghbutton!~

Slorg: ~Daaaahicantgurrrr~

Splot: ~burrrghah?~

Slorg: ~Guuuhwevelostuuuhhhhhhcontrol~

Splot: ~beeeearrdrrrrivehowcanthisbe?~

Splot tried to open the door.

Splot: ~Duuurthebridgeislockeduuurghdown~

Slorg: ~Daaarrghthatswhatibeentryinsluuuuuutotellyoubutyoudon'taaaaahlisten~

Author: Fred

...In order to stay with the routine of flashbacks...

Throughout the final Battles of Earth, Fred was challenged by a myriad of high-ranking Ushatarians, who fought for one of Earth's last antiques, and vestiges of it's heritage: A pack of pogs with the faces of humanity's dictators on them. Fred had managed to win them, but in so was locked into an escape pod and ejected into space. He'd, on the planet Carnival, set up his own space empire.

Ten years later, he tried to bring back Jim Morrison of the Doors, who's zombie robot killed him and caused three hundred years of turmoil, until it ran out of batteries. His legacy remains however, as he has an army of minions who worship him though he is gone, an army of minions who "deal" with the counter-revolutionists and viewscreenmarketers of space.

Out of the flashback/history lesson, Captain Absoloutely Nobody, and Sometwo else stood in front of a shadowy figure, one that decided it'd be cool and not show it's face.

Shadowy figure (since script format is easier): It seems the plan has gone perfectly, and those fools have my other boot?

Sometwo Else (Left): Yes, sir, and they'll never suspect WHAT WENDY's KIDS MEAL HAS INSIDE!

Absoloutely Nobody: Your prototype Supercollider weapon is well worth the effort.

Shadowy figure: Then I'm afraid You'll have to... HAVE A LITTLE FALL!

(The Shadowy figure reaches for a switch, but is stopped by SE's complaints)

SE: You weren't supposed to do that unless we failed. Says so right here, in your little desk calendar thing.

Shadowy figure: You ARE replacable, you know.

AN: It's what you hired us for.

Shadowy figure: I hate this name. Anyways, I think you'll have to... intercept them.

SE: Why's that?

Shadowy figure: My... watcher has determined they've become stuck.

AN: You had a watcher? Do you just not love us?

SE: I mean, I can see you not loving me, but why the captain?

Shadowy Figure: Rest assured I despise both of you, especially since you uphold the values of Fred. You live in the past. Do not fail me, by dying. The punishment shall be death.

AN: And... we DON'T want that, right?

SE: I'm not entirely sure.

Shadowy Figure: Well, I'll ground you for a week.

AN: Dayumn.

Shadowy Figure: Both of you, exercise extreme caution, they have amassed strength since the last meeting. Now, leave me in my awesome darkness.

SE: Yes, Sah, right away, sah.

(The two stumble out in handstands)

Shadowy Figure: Expendable, but dependable. Hey, that rhymed, I should write it down.

Secretary: One mr. Darth to see you, sir.

Shadowy Figure: Ah, Darth. It's been a while.

(At the feast)

Rhykette: I've got a bad feeling about this.

GM: (Dancing with female) I certainly don't. Though, it seems that they're spoiling us for whatever reason.

Rhykette: Alright, then, be that way.

LotS: Oh, shit, they're towing the Pie N' Cakes. I knew I should have left the slip in the dashboard. Tell me, can you hurry this up?

Delta Error: I'm afraid not. Our customs don't allow it.

GM: I like their customs. There's still the other ship, what's his name's.

XxX: Triple-X. But hey, not like that!

Triple-X: That's better.

Rhykette: You know, this still puts me off.

What's the cultural significance of this feast?

LotS: I like the free food, but indulge us.

Delta Error: Hrm, I would have had to tell you eventually. We must test you on full stomachs before our God.

Rhykette: I'm a robot. Any of those rules don't apply to me. You know, the even theoretical existance of souls.

Delta Error: Souls? No, we test upon truth. If you are worthy, we let you leave... but otherwise, we must sacrifice you. It's a test, in which you must all stand on a web of rope over lava. If you are true, then you will go free, but if you are liars, then you will be trapped, as if in your own web of lies.

GM: Well, nice knowing all of you.

Author: Masamune

Computer: Teka Nebula - The Bladechappe, Captain's Quarters

Masamune: *is sitting in front of a screen, watching the movie made centuries ago by hm and his friends* This makes me cry everytime... :(

Ashley: It doesn't make any sense to me.

Video:

---

Cobrax: Vorpal, I command you to...

Vorpal: Yeah, um... he's got guns. I'm siding with them.

Cobrax: Crap. I'm out of here.

~Cobrax runs for the door, but Don Miguel jumps out of nowhere and lands on top of him, squashing him flat.~

Luigi/Masamune/MJ/Vorpal/Don Miguel: Yays! We won!

THE END.

---

~the comlink opens~

Lt. Cho: [Comlink] Captain.

Masamune: *sniff* Aye?

Lt. Cho: Problem?

Masamune: No.

Lt. Cho: The Medical-Bot has finished.

Masamune: On my way.
_________________

Computer: Medical Bay

Masamune: Well?

Medical-Bot: We have rebuilt him. He is faster, stronger, angstier. He has 10 millions points or articulation, a complete set of accessories (sold separately), power lasers (batteries not included). His old human body is gone.

Masamune: Has he awakened yet?

Medical-Bot: He's still well, offline. Waking up will be no doubt a shock to him.

Masamune: Awesome. *presses the 'wake up Dark Ditto button'*

~There is a bed with a sheet on it. The sheet falls off as a figure sits up. It turns and stands up and looks at itself. It is completely robotic, metal but with a shiny waxed car look. He still has glasses, but they are built in and are in fact laser eyes now~

Dark Ditto: What happened?

Masamune: You died, kinda. We managed to save you-

Dark Ditto: But?

~Masamune holds up a mirror~

Dark Ditto: Oh, well I'll change forms. *tries but fails* What gives?

Masamune: You were rebuilt into a robot, only a small portion of you is still biological. So if like, you decide to pick up smoking, you can be a robot that can cough.

Dark Ditto: But my shapeshifting...

Medical-Bot: Is now 'Transforming'. Using the Energon we stole form a Decepticon, we used it to turn you into... a Transformer. With your innate shapeshifting powers, your ability to transform is unlimited. But as per being a mechanical being, all forms will be mechanical. Such is the price.

Dark Ditto: I am no longer a man... I am a machine. I am Dark Ditto no more. I am from now on... known as Ditto-Tron.

Masamune: That's nice. Why don't you work on repairs.

Ditto-Tron: I hate you

~Meanwhile~

Darth: A while, but not long enough. Still having those bumbling fools work for you?

Shadowy Figure: They're stupid, but I don't pay them and they generally get the job done. They are expendable but-

Darth: Dependable, I caught that.

Shadowy Figure: Well what have YOU been doing to keep your part of the deal?

Darth: I have been making preparations for myself. The first step has been made, soon I shall rejoin you to execute my end of the plan. You just make sure these so-called Galaxy Goers are kept occupied. And above all, divided. With each new 'Galaxy Goer', my plans become more complicated.

Shadowy Figure: Well fine. Be that way, I think I should be more awesome. I mean, I'm SHADOWY FIGURE.

Darth: There's a Shadowy Figure in all kinds of stories.

Shadowy Figure: So?

Darth: So do your job. *vanishes*

Shadowy Figure: At least I have a two part name.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

Luigi: So all we have to do is walk over this rope web over this pit of lava?

Delta: While weighed down by all that fatty food we fed you, yes.

GM: . . .

Triple-X: . . .

Rhykette: [dot][dot][dot]

Luigi: Easy.

Delta: Very good. You may go first.

Computer: Luigi steps on to the nearest rope and casually starts walking across. The rope very slowly sags to the lava as he reaches the middle.

Delta: Um... you may not want to go straight to the middle.

Luigi: Why not?

Delta: Well...

Computer: Luigi ignores him and walks straight to the middle of the web. The ropes touch the lava and catch on fire.

Delta: I wasn't supposed to warn you.

Computer: The ropes burn away. Luigi hangs in mid-air for a second, then crashes into the pit of lava.

GM: Well, no more web. Let's go.

Delta: Actually, the fact that there's no web implies that you all failed and need to be sacrificed now.

Triple-X: RUN FOR THE SHIPS!

Rhykette: The ships flew away.

Triple-X: DIE WITH DIGNITY!

Computer: Triple-X's shirt flashes to a picture of bounty-hunter Leia with a thermal detonator (though you can't actually see it under his heat resistant suit) as he straps sixty pounds of dynamite to his chest.

GM: Where'd you get those antique explosives?

Triple-X: E-net. ~turns to the Syntaxians~ Yeah, yeah. Just back off now. Unless you want this whole volcano to go up and kill ALL OF US.

Delta: I AM ERROR.

Computer: They wait for him to continue, but he doesn't.

Delta: Sorry, had to get that out of my system. You blow up our volcano, and whoever survives (aka me) will just move to another one. This sword gives me ultimate power. Hell, I could just cut the explosives off of you right now without blowing a single one.

Triple-X: Are you done?

Delta: Yeah.

Luigi: Let's all just calm down.

Computer: They turn in shock to see Luigi on the other side of the lava pit, sans his heat resistant suit.

Luigi: Delta Error. You may be big and scary and have a sword that I have in fact heard of before, but I have the advantage of being on the other side of a pit of lava with no rope web for you to cross. As if you ever could have.

Delta: What... did you say?

Luigi: You couldn't have crossed it. I have the moral high ground.

Computer: Delta leaps the pit of lava in a single bound, drawing his sword in the process. The Syntaxians grab the other Galaxy Goers to prevent any escape. Luigi grabs his laser swords and ignites them with a dramatic flip of his wrists. Delta hits the ground and brings his sword down at Luigi, but Luigi crosses his blades and catches it. The force of the blow manages to drive him into the ground, irregardless.

Delta: You would infer that I am inferior? I, who would conquer my own race with a mere blade?

Luigi: It's not a mere blade. ~mock slaps the sword with his laser sword~ Stop that.

Computer: Luigi rolls to his feet and backs away, spinning briefly to ward off Delta's subsequent attacks. Delta backs Luigi against the pit of lava, then jumps right in front of him. The shock throws Luigi into the lava. Delta swings his sword over his shoulder, but notices that Luigi is swimming to the other shore in its reflection.

Delta: What...?

Computer: Delta leaps back across the pit of lava and lands in front of Luigi, who is busy following the other escaping Galaxy Goers to the exit. Luigi skids to a halt.

Delta: You know, I'm not an unreasonable guy. You didn't have to burn my rope web like that. It's really poor form to leave during the Farewell Feast.

Luigi: Traditions are made to be broken.

Delta: So are bones.

Luigi: ~holds laser swords more defensively~

Delta: I didn't mean yours.

Author: Golem

Delta: Your female companion revealed that your ship has been stolen. We will track it down and make those in it pay for stealing from your crew before you had proven your worth.

~With that, the Syntaxians release their grip on the Galaxy Goers.~

Luigi: Wha...

Delta: I may not like to admit it, but you have passed the test. You and your friends are welcome guests while they are bound to this planet.

GM: Now, where'd those beautiful women go...?

~Later, the Galaxy Goers are staying in a lush suite. Just three miles south, in a cave, Delta Error talks with an aged Syntaxian woman in clothing similar to his...~

Aged Syntaxian woman: Of course, the ship must be forgotten as soon as possible. Promise them that we will make new one, and do not let on that we have two other crafts worthy of outer space. Also arrange to have our crafts are in secure hiding.

Delta: Is there no reason to worry that they will discover our use for their blood? The Truth Test was invented soley so any visitors did not find out about the human we have in captivity, as most die from attempting it.

Aged Syntaxian woman: If they feast every day as they did tonight, they will be in too heavy of a slumber to awake during the blood extraction. Make sure the two metal ones sleep in quarters separate from the humans, though. Also, every Syntaxian must make sure the crew is as comfortable as possible. This involves making sure they do not know we are taking their blood to ward off a genetic disease shared by all Syntaxians.

Delta: The Syntaxian people will be glad to silence themselves once your word becomes mine.

Aged Syntaxian woman: Good. And you say this man swam through the lava?

Delta: Yes, as if it were water.

Aged Syntaxian woman: Then the intense Syntaxian summer will not kill them as it would most humans. Also make sure all ties with our blood sellers on the black market are cut. If everything goes smoothly, we can have our human blood without tariff and without raising interplanetary suspicion.

Delta: And if the humans realize what is happening?

Aged Syntaxian woman: Our forces can subdue them.
You are dismissed.

Delta: Aye.

~Delta walks out of the cave, and to his surprise Luigi is standing at the entrance.~

Delta: What are you doing all the way out here, so close to the Badlands?

Luigi: Well, I followed you here because I wanted to ask you about our ship.

Delta: Ah, it was wise of you not to enter the cave. That is a sacred cave. If newcomers were to enter, the Syntaxians would grow hatred for those newcomers.
As for your ship, reports from sky watchers say it has escaped our planet, unfortunately. We will have to construct your crew a new ship, as we do not have any space crafts on this planet. Plans are easily ordered through interplanetary mail and raw materials can easily be found. Our blacksmiths will put together a fine ship for you.

Luigi: Well, looks like we'll be staying a while...

Delta: Do not worry, we will accommodate you and your crew until you can return to outer space.

Luigi: Wow, thanks. Syntaxians are a nice change of pace from the rest of the universe. Actually, my crew has made a few enemies in the recent past...

Delta: Do not worry about that either. Your friends our our friends, and your enemies our enemies.

Luigi: So... what are the other nations like? Any places not as warm as this area?

Delta: No other nations exist, as most of the planet is uninhabitable Badlands.

Luigi: So isn't it possible that your sky watchers just didn't see our ship because it went into the Badlands?

Delta: Yes. But if it did, may there be mercy on the souls of those who took the ship there, even considering their wrongful act of stealing it. The Badlands are truly horrifying, even to warriors such as me.

Luigi: Isn't the hotel a bit close to the Badlands?

Delta: I assure you, everything within our town is safe. Now, have you seen your accommodations in the suite? It truly is a wonderful place...

OOC: Man that took way too much talking and not enough action to set up.

Author: Luiigii of the Pipes

~Earth, Year 2065~

~Canadian Military Base (haha, yeah)~

Narrator: Luigi and Rebe, white-haired and wrinkled, stand to one side as Dodo and his son face Lucas and Becky, the latter two dressed in close-fitting space suits and helmets.~

Dodo: You're too old. I should be going.

Lucas: You have a son.

Dodo: I'm not your son?

Becky: You always will be. But he needs you more.

Lucas: Besides. We're not so old that we can't kick some Ushatarians around.

Dodo: This is the same thing that Mom and Dad did. You know that.

Luigi: Dodo.

Becky: We'll be back.

Narrator: They turn and jump into a pair of Maple Wing snub fighters. Dodo and co. walk away as these and many other fighters take off. Fighting ensues as soon as the Maple Wings breach the atmosphere, the Ushatarians' deformed Uruguay Memoirs easily cutting down the Maple Wings. The Maple Wings, disregarding their odds, clear a path for Lucas and Becky, who land in a hangar bay of the Star of Death II and jump out, laser swords ready. They hack a path to the viewing bridge, where they find Lord Emperor Hungary on his own.

Hungary: ~without turning~ Did you bring the pizza?

Lucas: All of this for a damn pizza.

Hungary: I see you've inherited your father's abilities.

Lucas: We haven't.

Becky: We're just really good.

Hungary: He used to work for Lord Emperor Uruguay, you know. But he failed to protect the first Star of Death. ~turns to them~ This one shall not fail.

Lucas: We'll see about that.

Hungary: Yes. We shall.

Narrator: Hungary lifts twelve of his tentacles, each one holding a laser sword.

Hungary: We shall.

Becky: Brother...

Narrator: Lucas and Becky strike at Hungary, but his defense is too strong. The fighting barely before Hungary spins ten of his laser swords, creating two shields to catch Lucas and Becky on, then stabs them with the remaining two. He withdraws his laser swords and watches them collapse, nods, and slithers away. Lucas and Becky reach for each others' hands.

Becky: Poor Dodo...

Lucas: Do you remember the forest, Becky?

Becky: I do.

***

Dodo: Where are they?

Rebe: ~points up~ They're putting the main cannon into position.

Luigi: ...they're gone.

Dodo: They said they'd be back.

Luigi: They won't be.

Dodo: ~walks away for a moment, then looks to the sky~ Then where's he?

Luigi: Who?

Dodo: Dad! I told him to come! I spent three months chasing him around so I could tell him to come and take us off planet! Where is he?

Luigi: I wouldn't count on him...

Dodo: Dammit! One thing! He can't do one thing for his son! Drops me off with a family of hobos as soon as he has to take responsibility! And now he won't even pay me back!

Luigi: We're not hobos.

Dodo: Yes you... sorry.

Luigi: If we were hobos, I couldn't have afforded those.

Narrator: Luigi motions idly to a pair of modified escape pods that weren't there before.

Luigi: Take him and go.

Dodo: But... those are yours.

Luigi: Too old. There's no time.

Dodo: ~nods and picks up his son~ Thank you.

Rebe: Be safe.

Luigi: And take this. ~tosses Dodo his laser sword~

Narrator: Dodo carries his son to the escape pods, then straps him into one. As he's doing so, the wind picks up and a tree conveniently falls on the other.

Dodo: Wh--No!

Narrator: Dodo runs to the other, then turns and looks at the first. After a moment, he walks back over.

Son: Daddy.

Dodo: ~rubs his son's hair~ It'll all be just a happy memory. ~puts Luigi's laser sword into the escape pod~

Son: Daddy!

Dodo: ~hits the ignition~ Goodbye.

Son: DADDDDDDDEEEEEEE ~cough~ EEEEEE! ~disappears into the clouds~

Dodo: I did what you'd want me to, Katie.

Slort: [You did right.]

Dodo: ~turns to Slort~ Watch him.

Slort: [Of course.]

Narrator: Dodo turns and throws his arms out, howling at the sky. The MegaLaser64 from the Star of Death hits the planet.

~KABOOM!~

Narrator: Ahem...

~downloads consciousness into Computer~

Computer: The escape pod drifts away from the planet, one crying child inside. Several Ushatarian fighters start after it, but are blown apart by the drifting Slort. Slort drifts up to the escape pod and looks into the glass.

Son: Unca.

Slort: Grap hurte myop.

Son: Uh...

Computer: The escape pod suddenly jumps into hyperspace, leaving Slort alone.

Slort: [Damn. I'll catch up some day. Good luck, Luigi.]

~Syntax, Year 2345~

~Syntaxian Volcano Village~

Computer: Luigi awakes slowly, not bothering to open his eyes. A mosquito bite itches at his arm, but he tries to ignore it, thinking instead about the stolen ships and the loss of Slorg and Splot. They were mindless bodyguards, but he liked to have familiar company around. Of course... he couldn't just go looking for them without GM complaining that they didn't go looking for Don Miguel.

The bite gets worse, so he shrugs and opens his eyes. Delta Error is leaning next to him, trying to remain completely still, holding a needle and syringe into Luigi's arm.

Luigi: What are you doing?

Delta: N-nothing. ~notices that the syringe is melting~ Just wanted to make sure you weren't carrying any...

Computer: The blood leaks out of the melted syringe and onto Delta's hands, scalding them. He tries to ignore the pain, relying on the sword at his side for help.

Delta: Any harmful diseases. I have to look out for my people.

Luigi: Sorry. It might be hard to run them on me.

Delta: S-so I see.

Luigi: You can go wash that off.

Delta: Of course... ~runs away, then comes back a bit later~ So... your blood. Is that why you can swim in lava?

Luigi: I guess.

Delta: Interesting. Unfortunately, I must depart.

Luigi: Really... All right.

Computer: Delta walks away, mumbling about the lack of good blood donors these days.

Author: Mario Jr.

~Onboard the stolen police cruiser~

(Nefertina is fumming with anger as she sits bonded in the passenger seat in the far back.)

Nefertina: Why do I have to restrained like a common animal!

Datana: It's for your own protection you highness.

Kolan: *scoffs* More like ours.

Nefertina: Grrr! How dare you--

Kolan: *mocks* defy the Neko-Neko Empire. Yeah, that's what you all say.

Datana: Kolan, please. She's royalty.

Nefertina: That's right!

Datana: Even if she's a pain in the ass.

Nefertina: !!!

Kolan: Man. Are we really going to hvae to go through with this, Day?

Datana: If she's the real Neko-Neko Empress, we have no choice but to return her.

Kolan: But we'll be killed! Neko's are tricksters. Once we hand back their precius queen, they'll double cross us and kill us AND Tiffa.

Datana: Perhaps. But we have to at least try.

Kolan: Why?

Datana: Buh? What do you mean why!?

Kolan: Ever since we met the broad we've had nothing but one delay after the other. And besides, Neko's aren't that bright.

Nefertina: *grimaces*

Kolan: They probably won't even know the difference are better off under Tiffa's rule anyways. Maybe she's happy there. I say we just dump this chick into outer space and be done with it.

Nefertina: I protest to that!

Kolan/Datana: Shut up!

Datana: Kolan, that's just crazy talk. We're returning the Impress in exchange for Tiffa and that's final.

Nefertina: Template:Razz

(Nefertina had to think fast. She had been in worst situations before. She could easily turn the tables and bend these lower life-forms to her will. Those acting classes should come in handy... what was that girl's name again?)

Kolan: What the?

Datana: She fainted...

(Datana gets out of her seat and examines

Nefertina more closely. Admittedly, she did resemble Tiffa a whole lot. Their captive appeared to still be breathing though very shallowly. Suddenly Nefertina shoots up with a huge gasp of air.)

Nefertina: Day?

Datana: Huh?

Nefertina: Day!? What's going on? Why am I wearing these strange clothes? And why am I all tied up to this chair?

Datana: Tiffa?

Kolan: Bull. Shit.

Nefertina: Oh no... it happened again, didn't it?

Datana: What happened?

Nefertina: I'm sorry Day. I should've told you. I kinda have this problem... you see I have this... other side of me.

Datana: Multiple personalities?

Nefertina: Yeah. The other side of me isn't aware of my existence. She acts totally indepedently from me. Sometimes it gets me into trouble.

Kolan: Your other personality is the Queen of the Neko's?

Nefertina: She thinks she's Neko-Neko Impress. I know. It's crazy. But you gotta believe me.

Kolan: Alright, don't care. Let's get you home. Where to?

Nefertina: System P3X-791.

Kolan: But there's nothing there but a blackhole.

Nefertina: Trust me. That's where my home is. It's a space colony so it's not recorded on the maps.

Kolan: Alright then.

(Kolan pushes the ship to full throttle as the ship events an event horizon. Once in subspace, the ship slows down and Datana gets back up her seat and checks on Nefertina again. She appeared to be asleep. Great. Very cautiously Datana creeps up towards Nefertina and pulls back her bra/chestplate.)

Loter: o.O

Datana: *whispering* It's not what you think.

(Loter shrugs and knods back to sleep. Datana continued carefully pulling back the chestplate. Sure enough, it was there. The same exact birthmark Tiffa showed her in private school in their younger days.)

Datana: It is her!

(Suddenly, Nefertina grabs her by the arm and pulls her in for the kiss.)

Datana: *jumps back* What the!

Kolan: Hey! Don't make me come back there, Datana!

Nefertina: What's the matter Day? I thought you reaching into my bra like that was some sort of invitation.

Datana: It-- I-- I was just checking if you were really Tiffa.

Nefertina: And did you like what you saw?

Datana: Am I talking to Nefertina or Tiffa?

Nefertina: Does it matter it really matter?

Datana: I want to talk to Tiffa.

Nefertina: That boring party pooper? Why don't you and I go in the back and have some fun. I don't usually do aliens but in your case, I'm willing to make an exception.

Datana: That... I... No! I want my friend back!

Nefertina: So be it. *faints*

Datana: Tiffa?

Nefertina: *gasps* Day?

Dattana: Oh, Tiffa!

(Datana embraces Nefertina in her arms.)

Nefertina: Uh, Datana? ...As flattering as it is ... I'm not sure what I did to deserve this such a hug.

Datana: Don't worry Tiffs. When we get you home, we'll get you the best help there is.

Nefertina: Day... I...

(Datana squeezes tighter, losing herself in Tiffa's familar scent that Nefertina seemed to also share with her real friend. Loter glances back at the two girls just into time to see an sinister glimmer in Nefertina's eyes.)

~Onboard the Bladeshappe~

(Masamune is walking around when he spots Jorge messing around with the controls while Tiffa and Andi stood next to him reading magazines and not doing anything in particular..)

Masa: You three!

Jorge: *jumps up* Gah!

Masa: What are you three doing loitering about? Why aren't you in the brig?

Jorge: Because... no one put us there?

Masa: Carry on then. *leaves*

Jorge: *sighs with relief*

Tiffa: Did you put in the encrypted distress call?

Jorge: Sure did. Datana and them should receive in the next two posts or so with our exact coordinates and everything.

Tiffa: Damn? That long?

Jorge: It does have to travel through time and space.

Tiffa: And you're sure Captian Masamune and his men would detect it on their computers.

Andi: If you ask me, they don't seem to give a frak about us. Least of all Jorge.

Jorge: Yeah... Hey!

Author: Masamune

~Elsewhere~

Don Miguel: That's what happened.

Steve: You've captured a lot of space bandits, pirates, rebels, and smugglers. Fortunately I hated all of them. So you have done me a favor.

Felix: Well the repairs are all done. *sees Strawman and looks up in the air at no one*

Strawman/Steve: Good. Stop that. No you stop that Argh. *stomp off to opposite sides of the ship*

Don Miguel: Power struggle much?

Felix: You have no idea.

Don Miguel: I'm having an idea here. You... take me to my ship. And then Steve and Strawman can settle their differences in a duel. (And then I take the winner in for a bounty)

Strawman: No, we're going after that idiot Masamune.

Steve: Wait, Masamune?

Strawman: Yeah. But it's 'myu-nay'.

Don Miguel: He pronounces it 'Myun'.

Strawman: I beg to differ.

Steve: So Masamune was that pirate who attacked us. That sounds goood.

Strawman: As if, we're going after the Pies 'N Cake.

Steve: That's a good idea.

Strawman: Don't get your hopes up, kid. We're going after Masamune.

Steve: Darn.

Don Miguel: Hey! If we catch him, we can split the bounty. Guys? Guys! Damn.

~Meanwhilers, in the Captain's Room of the Bladechappe~

Computer: Masamune and Ashley are in bed, OMG. Sleeping though.

Masanune: Snoooooore.....

~a obnoxious ding sounds~

Masamune: *gets* Whaddamatter.

Lt. Cho: *on intercom* Repairs are finished, captain.

Masamune: Itoldshaeneverwakemeup.

Lt. Cho: There is an urgent matter.

Masamune: Don'tyouevershleeep?

Lt. Cho: I slept last week.

Ashley: What is it?

Masamune: Nothing.

~Later, on the bridge~

Masamune: Well?

Lt. Cho: Look at these logs.

Masamune: Looks normal to me.

Lt. Cho: They do, all automatically generated logs by the computer. Ever two hours, the computer runs a deep sensor sweep. But this one is off.

Masamune: Hm, 2 o clock, 4, 5, and then 6. Why is there a 5?

Lt. Cho: Somebody didn't check the pattern too deeply. It was made to look like the computer did it. Whoever didi it was pretty good, the computer keeps telling me there is nothing there.

~Later~

Depkon: Absurd, why would I send out a message?

Lt. Cho: It had to be someone clever to be able to do it.

Masamune: Dark- I mean 'Ditto-Tron' and Ashley are behind on technology, so we can rule them out.

Depkon: What does the message say?

Lt. Cho: Still deciphering it.

Depkon: What about our prisoners?

Masamune: They could be suspects. Let's get them moved into the brig. Separate cells.

Lt. Cho: What do you plan to do with the empress?

Masamune: She was an unexpected prize, but she shall prove useful. We'll simply exchange her with the empire. They get the empress, they lift that absurd bounty off me.

Lt. Cho: So we're going into Neko-Neko space?

Depkon: What about my ship?

Masamune: *jerks thumb at Depkon* We still have him. We need to get him back on his ship. This ship is getting crowded.

Lt. Cho: Very well, plotting a course towards the Pies 'N Cakes last known coordinates.

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