Story:MMEDDP3 Chapter 1
| Chapters in Mega Mega Extreme Doki Doki Panik 3: Very Foreign Policy |
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Vorpal[edit]
Play this theme for the opening [www.vgmusic.com/music/con..._Time~.mid]
What was the start of all this?
When did the cogs of fate begin to turn?
Perhaps it is impossible to grasp the answer now,
From deep within the flow of time . . .
But, for a certainty, back then,
We loved so much, yet hated so much,
We hurt others and were hurt ourselves . . .
Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
Whilst our laughter,
Echoed under cerulean skies.
(About this time you should be at a part of the music, where the tempo speeds up)
MEGA MEGA EXTREME DOKI DOKI PANIK 3:
VERY FOREIGN POLICY
Starring:
President Vorpal
Acting President Ditto McCloaker
First Lady in Red Sapphire
Treasurer MagiKoopa
Defense Sec. Flutter
Education Sec. Dodo
Speaker Masamune
President Pro Tempore Murasame
and featuring
Energy Sec. PW Deeson
Scene opens up in a military instiallation underneath the White House~
Ditto: So until we can find President Vorpal and Treasurer MagiKoopa, I'll be the Acting President.
Saph: Well should we make a statement to the press?
Flutter: I'll get Weird Al . . .
Ditto: No, I'll do it myself.
Ditto walks into a room filled with the press.
Reporter #1: Is it true the President Vorpal never made it to Japan?
Reporter #2: Where is President Vorpal?
Reporter #3: Is Wyoming floating in the Atlantic as some would like to believe?
Reporter #4: Does this dress make me look fat?
Ditto: Please, people, sit down, I have a statement to make. At aprroxitamtely 5:30 Eastern Time, we lost contact with Air Force One on its way to Japan. Aboard the aircraft were President Vorpal and Treasury Secretary MagiKoopa. Also aboard were regular staff whose names shall not be given out. We believe that someone has hijacked the plane. Until President Vorpal is safely back, I shall be Acting President. Thank you.
Ditto walks off as the press ask many other questions.
Elsewhere in Saudi Arabia~
Vorpal: So your that guy that the Old Man failed to get rid of.
Insane: That's right, because the Old Man didn't totally irradicate me, I fool all my subjects that he was scared and ran off because of our superior strength.
Vorpal: Clever, so you're gonna hold me ransom?
Insane: Not quite.
MagiKoopal: Wha, what do you mean?
Insane: Well, I signed an agreement with ABC to produce a reality based TV program that involved people of power. I agree to keep the people here in exchange for nuclear secrets.
Vorpal: You fiend!
Insane: Sadly, I am not the master mind of this project. It was this man . . .
A figure steps out of the shadows, the very one that was on Air Force One.
Vorpal: Mr. Cooper!
Mr. Cooper: Yes, it was I *pulls off mask* Anderson Cooper!
Vorpal: I should've noticed from your voice from The Mole!
MagiKoopa: So wait, we're part of a reality program, like Survivor or something.
AC: Not quite. We set up several thousand hidden cameras in the Whitehouse to record how Vice President McCloaker handles a crisis situation. We were going to see how long he would hold out before allowing himself to become President, and we will broadcast this all over the world.
Vorpal: But, how will Ditto not know that this is happening?
AC: Well, since you asked. . .
Ditto McCloaker[edit]
Ohhh... Anderson Cooper. I was thinking of someone else... hee hee... Guess I don't know you as well as I thought! Okaay... lesse here... Oh, boy, have I been waitin' on this!
Andy: Why, because he hates Reality TV! Mwa ha ha! And further, we have sent notices to everyone in the U.S. not to speak about this to anyone not involved, i.e. the gov't.
Vorpal: And what will you call this travesty?
Andy: Why... Little Brother! The show where the American people are on the other side of the camera! They leapt at the chance!
Vorpal: How did you get those cameras in there?
Andy: ...You see, Clintin' took most of the furniture with him on his way out.
Vorpal: ...And what he left I sent out to be either burnt or scrubbed with powerful disinfectant.
Andy: Indeed. So the White House was provided with brand new furniture... courtesy of ABC! And concealed inside are cameras, that, when placed, will give us the most candid peek into the Halls of Power ever!
Vorpal: But... that's a threat to national security!
Andy: It's also good ratings. People went wild over a single photo of Lyndon Johnson crying in the Oval Office over the Vietnam War. Now, the viewing audience will be provided with a non-stop supply of heart-stopping, tear-jerking melodrama, beamed straight to their dinner tables from the Big House itself, all day, all night! Mwa ha ha ha!
Vorpal: You fiend.
Insane: Relax, Mr. Vorpal. You should be glad. You will finally get your wish. Americans will pay more attention to politics than ever before!
Vorpal: Yeah... at first. But soon, it will go the same way as the televised Congress. People will get bored, and they will become more apathetic than ever!
Insane: And then, when Americans are completely jaded, I will be free to move in and take over! Mwa ha ha ha ha...!
Vorpal: You're plan is doomed to fail. *screen pans in on him dramatically during his speech* You forget that the White House is jam-packed with the nation's best and brightest, with my Vice President Ditto McCloaker at the top of the heap. You won't be able to fool them for long!
Soddarn Insane: Oh yeah? *pushes button that reaveals a giant TV screen*
~At the White House~
*Sgt. Flutter is sitting in his office, totally alone, doing paperwork*
Sgt. Flutter: AH-CHOO!
Armchair: Geshundteit.
Flutter: Thank you. *goes back to work*
*Back in Saudi Arabia*
Vorpal: D'oh.
(I have more. I gotta pick my VP, and that'll be a post in and of itself! Any guesses as to whom you think it will be...?)
Vorpal[edit]
lolololololololol, I bet you thought it was Mr. Cooper from "Hangin with Mr. Cooper," right? I'm laughin so hard right now, I'm fallin out of my chair!
Sgt. Flutter[edit]
Flutter: Wait a minute. My ArmChair just sneezed. That must mean...
ArmChair: Uh-oh.
Flutter: ... I've got to call ParaKarry. I was hoping this day would never come.
*Flash Back, Back, Back, Back, Back*
PK: Where are you going?
Flutter: Washington.
PK: Ok call me when you get there.
Flutter: I'll call you when my ArmChair says Geshundteit. (Good thing that won't happen mwahahahahahahahaha)
*Unflash Back, Back, Back, Back, Back*
In the oval office...
Flutter: Ditto I need to use the phone.
Ditto: No.
Flutter: But...
*Flash Back, Back, Back, Back, Back*
PK:What do you hope to become?
Flutter: President. (Ha, I think he bought it)
*Unflash Back, Back, Back, Back, Back*
Ditto: No.
Flutter: Oh ok. *looks at Picture where a camera is convinuntly hidden* Wait a minute...
Picture: Uh-oh.
Flutter: This picture is tilted *tilts picture back *Something strange is going on* Ditto...
Ditto: What is it now?
Flutter: Maybe I should form a search party to look for Vorpal.
*with Vorpal...*
Cooper: It won't do you any good.
*with Flutter...*
Ditto: Where would you search?
Flutter: That is a tough one. I'm going to go and ask Merlon. Whenever Mario was in a fix and din't know where to go he would always ask him. At least that is what PK told me...
*Flash Back, Back, Back, Back, Back*
PK: Whenever Mario was in a Jam he would go see Merlon.
*Unflash Back, Back, Back, Back, Back*
Flutter: Well I'm off to see Merlon. *walks otside of White House and flys into PK*
Flutter: PK what are you doing here?
PK: Well I Have some mail for you.
Letter:
Dear Flutter,
Don't come to my shop!!!
Your Friend, Merlon
Flutter: Wait a minute, Merlon dosen't live in Sadui Arabia. This means trouble!!! Merlon must be on vacation!. I've got to go to Sadui Arabia so I can ask him where to find Vorpal.
PK: Great I'll go with you.
Shrub: Uh-oh.
Masamune[edit]
Hmm... I have a few things to work out before joining this. Mainly my involvement in these kind of OG's. I guess all the Writing OG's are going to my head, but I'm still thinking it over. By the by, great work you three so far.
Ditto McCloaker[edit]
No, no, no, Vorp. I didn't think of that Mr. Cooper either. Think about it. A guy who goes "Bwahaha" and kidnaps peoople? With a name like "Cooper?" I assumed you were trying to work Bowser into the story, as some sort of crony. I'm glad you didn't, though.
Anyway, it's too late for me to post tonight. I'll have to tomorrow. Anyone else who wants to is fine by me. I'll probably reveal my VP a bit later in the story. It'll be funny, I promise.
In the meantime, I want humor and lots of it!
Oh, and Sarge, glad your back and all. Oh, and I was gonna say not to drag Paper Mario into this, but, hey, PWD brought in all kinds of Kirby stuff as his back up characters, so go ahead. Just... don't turn this into a Paper Mario story, okay?
Glad you approve, Masamune!
Ditto McCloaker[edit]
Grr... Wake up, people!!!
*P. W. Deeson runs in*
PWD: Hey, Acting President Ditto! You're gonna need a Vice President, aren't you?
Ditto: *sigh* All right, who told him?!
PWD: Oooh! Oooh! Can I be the Vice President of the United States?! Pleasepleasepleaseplease *runs around in circles for an hour*
Ditto: C'mere.
PWD: Yes?
Ditto: C'mere.
PWD: Yeah?
Ditto: Lemme tell you a little story. It goes like this...
'Once upon a time...
...NO!!!'
PWD: Whaaaa!
Ditto: And the moral of the story is...
GET BACK TO WORK!!!
PWD: Yessir! *runs*
Ditto: Ah, what a way to start the day! Well now, what shall I do next?
Sapphire: You really should think about nominating a successor, just in case you... uh...
*Masamune and Murasame walk in*
Masamune: Um, can we make a suggestion?
Ditto: You can't have the job.
Masamune: Nooo. We're not that irresponsible. We're happy being Speaker of the House and President Pro Tem.
Murasame: But, it's imperative that we in the Senate have some link between us and the White House. A Vice President.
Ditto: This is nonsense. I won't hear of your dirty schemes-
Sapphire: Perhaps we should hear them out. Go on, guys.
Masamune: *reading*
~recited to the tune of "The Perfect Nanny" from Mary Poppins~
Masamune: If you want this top position, Have a crusty disposition. Pudgy cheeks, No jowls. Sharp eyes...
Strong bowels.
Murasame: That's the part I put in!
Ditto:
Masamune: You must be tough, You must be gritty. Charismatic, And fairly witty.
Former serviceman, Defense Hawk; Focus on integrity; Straight Talk.
Be conservative in spending, but not too cheap, What we need is a moderate Veep. Don't hold a grudge against a few barrels of pork, And don't be intimidated by Senators from New York...!
Sapphire: Okay, that was mine...!
Masamune: If you'll be fair and Represent us, We'll won't give you cause to Resent us.
Submit your appication, Include your name Cordially yours, on this occasion,
Both: Masamune and Mura-SAME!
P.S. Keep in mind, applicant, things are grim.
PWD: *running in* I'll do it!
Masamune and Murasame: Any-one but HIM.
*the music ends*
Masamune: Well?
Murasame: Whaddaya think?
Ditto: *thinks* Well, that's very nice...
*grabs their piece of paper and rips it up*
Ditto: ...but let's focus on what's attainable. Let's not waste our time wishing for fantasies, okay?
*Ditto throws the pieces of paper out the window. However, they are picked up by the wind, and fly, as if by magic, over to... someplace else...*
Any guesses as to who it will be?
To anyone who paid early attention to Election 2000, one of the lines in my song should sound very familiar...
In any case, before I reveal it, I wanna see some posts! GET TO WORK!!!
Parasol Waddle Dee[edit]
Hey, that song sounds like the lyrics from The Simpsons!!! And...and...if you were acting president, could you...perhaps...legalize brussel sprouts again?! AUGH!!! Anderson Cooper is that annoying human from The Mole!!! I HATE it when he says:
"...And then, there were nine..." "...And then, there were eight..." "...And then, there were seven..." "...And then, there were six..." "...Henry paid the price..." (That gave it away! I KNEW Kathryne was the MOLE) "...And then, there were five..." "...And then, there were four..." "...And then, there were three..."
_____________________________________________
Rocky looks up from his coffee in time to see PWD rush into the office.
PWD- Coffee?? You drink coffee???? That is almost as bad as...um...well, you are going to hurt your rock system.
Rocky- I can't sleep.
PWD-...Then don't drink coffee.
Rocky- I don't wanna sleep. I wanna be awake for my master's return.
PWD-....Don't drink coffee.
Rocky- *slurps up coffee* I don't wanna be asleep for my master's return.
PWD-...
Paula enters, suddenly.
Paula- Then DON'T drink coffee!
Rocky- You aren't my master....you can't tell me what to do...
Paula & PWD- THEN DON'T DRINK COFFEE!!!!!
Rocky-...Need...coffee...Zzzzz...
Paula and PWD look at each other, puzzled.
PWD- Uh...Paula, get rid of the coffee and tell Acting President Ditto McCloaker that Rocky's depressed and is drowning his problems in the expresso.
Paula- *Salutes* Yessir! *leaves*
PWD-...Good. Now I can get back to work.
_____________________________________________
Ditto: Who should I choose...?
*Knock* *Knock*
Ditto:...?
Sapphire: I'll get it.
Sapphire opens the door to see Paula.
Sapphire: Um...who are you? Are you one of those...er...Nintendo characters?
Paula- *Salutes* Yes, ma'am! I have important news for Acting President Ditto McCloaker!
Sapphire:...Who are you?
Paula- Paula PoleStar! You know, from EarthBound?
Sapphire:......
Ditto: Who's there?
Sapphire: It's Paula...from EarthBound...I think. Well, I'm going to play DreamCast now, so please don't disturb me. After that, I'll play GameCube, then I'll play GameBoy Advance...
Paula- Um...sir, it's about Rocky...
Ditto: Rocky? Who's Rocky?
Paula- Vorpal's pet.
Ditto:...
Paula- President Vorpal's pet.
Ditto:....
Paula- President Vorpal's pet rock.
Ditto:.....
Paula- President Vorpal's not-quite-mentioned pet rock, Rocky. The one who gave up all that Uranium.
Ditto:......Oh! What about him?
Paula- Um...well...he's drowning his problems in coffee, instead of drinking alcohol. And the coffee is bad for his rock system, so if there is another energy crisis he can't spit up minerals of any kind which will be bad for the state that will eventually die without the energy supply and then we will all be blamed by the citizens and --
Ditto: -- You're almost as bad as P.W.Deeson on a sugar rush.
Paula-.........
______________________________________________
-"Gimme my coffee!"-
-"No."-
-"I said, GIMME MY COFFEE!!"-
-"And I said, NO!!"-
*BAM!* *SMASH!* *CRASH!*
Kirby- Huh?
Yoshi- Hmmmm...Rocky and PWD are fighting again...Rocky drinks coffee?!?!
Kirby- Ya know, I think they'd learn by know that fighting doesn't solve anything.
Yoshi- Yeah...maybe one of us could apply for the Vice President position until President Vorpal returns.
Kirby- Yeah,...hey, I know! We could gather everyone together and ask Ditto!
Yoshi- Yeah!
Kirby- Okay, I'll recruit everyone who only works at the SNES system! You can recruit everyone who only works at the N64 system!
Yoshi- Aye, aye, Captain Kirby! *Runs off*
Kirby-...Maybe I should also recruit Nintendo characters from Original Nintendo, also known as NES....YEAH!!!
Sgt. Flutter[edit]
Don't worry I won't Merlon is just going to be mentioned once or twice.
Luigi of the Pipes[edit]
Can I join this, or is it restricted to certain people?
Masamune[edit]
Masamune: Our jobs are so easy!
Murasame: True, true.
Masamune: Yep... oh, I've been meaning to ask you... what is it we do?
Murasame: Beats me.
Masamune: Ahh well... hey! I got a new evil villainous idea! *whisper, whisper*
Murasame: Hmm.. but where are we going to get two people?
Masamune: You know....!
Murasame: SPLIT!? Are you crazy... well... alright..
*Masamune suddenly splits into two similar smaller versions. Murasame does likewise*
Mura: Weehee! Now the fun can begin!
Masa: Yes, yes! While Mune and Same do the little... scheme. Me and you will stay here... *focuses power and resumes a full size* My power is a little short though. So much for not sleeping...
*Same and Mune wander off*
Mura: *grows to normal size* Ho ho! This is TOO perfect!
Sapphire[edit]
just so you know, finally finished PG 15. i have no time now, but thought i'd say that.... btw, this is very funny! ^.^
Luigi of the Pipes[edit]
Well, if no one will respond... I'll take it as a yes.
*Two figures stand before the White House. One is obviously a Goomba, and the other a young man.*
LOTP: We finally made it Slort! Washington! The place where dreams come true!
*Slort (the Goomba) gestures with his foot, then winks his eye to emphasize the statement.*
LOTP: Yes, I know they call Hollywood that, but for today, it's Washington.
*LOTP walks up to the door and knocks. Slort waits patiently behind.*
Luigi of the Pipes[edit]
<One hour later>
*LOTP leans on the White House door, smoking a bubble pipe. Slort peeks through one of the windows.*
LOTP: How...much...longer?!
Ditto McCloaker[edit]
That's what I'd like to know.
Vorpal, just because your missing/presumed dead doesn't mean your on vacation. Post!
Everyone else, this goes for you too!
Sorry I couldn't be here earlier, LOTP. No, this story isn't restricted to anyone. In fact, we welcome competent writers. You can join, but first you must understand some things about this series.
This is not some run-of-the-mill video game-adventure OG. It is, in fact, totally different. MMEDDP is a political comedy, where we parody world events and famous figures. It is required that you have at least a passing knowledge of world events, particularly politics (U.S. and abroad).
While the premise of this story is that Vorpal has been taken hostage by the Middle East, this is the basis for making fun of foreign and domestic policy.
Basic Training:
-Absolutely NO deterioration. There must be no question about this. Remember: We are the U.S. Government. We can have you killed.
-Clear, grammatically correct writing is appreciated.
-It is recommended that you have a good sense of satire, and, again, the aforementioned familiarity with the world.
-In order to get the 'feel' of the series, you should probably at least glance over (or, better yet, read entirely) MMEDDP 2. Also, included in there is a link to the ORIGINAL MMEDDP. You may even want to search that out and start there.
Basically, let's have fun!
*The green-clad party stands there, bored. Finally, the door to the White House opens*
Luigi: Well, it's about time! I've been wait-
*A large Secret Serviceman appears*
Luigi: Yikes!
Secret Serviceman: Who are you?
Luigi: I... I'm Luigi of the Pipes. I've been waiting a while-
Secret Serviceman: Uh-huh. No wonder. The service entrance is around to the side. *jerks his thumb*
Luigi: Service Ent-
Secret Serviceman: Uh huh. You're the plumbers, correct? Service door. You can't just walk in the front door of the White House. Now, GO.
Luigi: Grumble, grumble... Lousy, stinkin'...
Secret Serviceman: Your country wishes you a good day, citizen. *slams door*
Okay! You're 'admitted!' I don't know if you actually intended to be a plumber or what. For instance, your character could represent 'Greenpeace,' or actually be a plumber in the White House or what. That's up to you. Just let me say... Welcome!
| Chapters in Mega Mega Extreme Doki Doki Panik 3: Very Foreign Policy |
| 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 |